Funny things about my life...

  1. Word Of The Day

    Today's word of the day is ZEN. I refound my Zen today. I didn't even know I lost it. I was mowing the lawn, giving it a scalp cut, 1st cut of the spring. This is where you cut it at the mower's lowest setting, trim off all the dead so it can grow back green for the spring. I was transfixed atop the riding mower doing a repetitive task, the drone of the engine, gentle breeze in my hair. I'm back in the groove again. A calm & peace came over me, & I was reminded of when I worked as...
  2. Temporary Blindness -True Tales

    SoberDate 8041 A couple nights ago a series of thunderstorms rolled thru our area at nighttime. Around 11pm I got up for a late night snack from the fridge (a cheese stick) when the power went out. I ate my cheese and went back to bed. Around midnight, my wife awoke to use the bathroom and the 1st thing she noticed was it was pitch black, no light from the clock, no nightlight from the bathroom, no light outside from the streetlight. Nothing, just total inky blackness. Now mind you,...
  3. I'm choosing denial

    I'm Choosing Denial If somebody asks: Did that really happen on saturday? I'm choosing denial. When someone says: You're family really forgot? I'm choosing denial. Should somebody say: It was that bad? I'm choosing denial. I'll choose denial like a loyal friend. I'll reject reality like the current trend. I'll run with denial, and I will never look back again.
  4. Yours

    Is it bad that I want to be held, but in arms that aren't yours? Is it bad that I want to be kissed, but by lips that aren't yours? Is it bad that I want to be gazed at lovingly, but by eyes that aren't yours? Is it horrible that I fear being loved, but only by the heart that is yours?
  5. My name is triple z, and I am addicted to NOT STAYING STILL

    So, I have beeen off for awhile, and I sincerely apologize to any that care that I was gone. To be honest, this is the forst time in seven days that I had access to a computer and didn't have homework to do:D Yay me :D Anywho... In the last seven days I have: >earned the fourth highest rank on my tennis team (of fifteen girls) >confessed to my guy friend that I liked him, and my girl friend >set these two up because they liked each other >broke the two up because they were confused to...
  6. Yeah, it's raw...

    Got my coca-cola glass and I'm spinnin' it around, pondering and wondrin' why my world's upside down. Got messed up in things I couldn't avoid, and now I am confused, also annoyed. Spin little glass, you're my centerfuge. Can't take anymore, reality deludes. Good gawd dang! I thought I had escaped; but here I am again, in my emotions draped. Darned skippy, my emotions are worn on my sleeves. And when I finally embrace sanity, it gets up and leaves. Can't take it any...
  7. The Odd Musings of a Z

    Love fully, live happily, and forgive unconditionally. Growing takes learning; learning takes understanding, understanding takes trying, and trying takes COMMITMENT. Wield your pen so that it may maim the confidence of the guy with the sword. Don't underestimate Forever until you are on your deathbed. Life goes on whether you're weak or strong, just try not to be dragged along. You have to get up and strut, or at least pretend not to crawl. Loves come and go; your knowledge...
  8. nothhing, no title

    sometimes I wonder if I've any friends at all they say ne'ry a word to me in summer attached to my hip come fall or even worse "I'm there for oyu" yet no actions prove said words true I admit that I'm not always nice but I don't lie about how I feel I tell you true "I just don't want to be 'rpound you" Can these words not be spoken to me or are there none that wish to say them I don't want a bff but I want to know I've freinds left people don't like when I'm always...
  9. Jj

    It started with a glance We only met by chance I was but a young boy and she the new school toy a girl from a far state and me with none to hate she'd be my target, my focus and I the one she wished to get locusts five years this did we endure and then feelings changed from what they were before a friendship, a bond something that was time beyond orbitting round each other like planets think of one another with the odd regrets is fate playing a game most cruel or...
  10. The Verge of Tears

    That's where I stand right now. I need to rant. I need to vent. DO NOT correct me on anything, I need to say this. First, Obama. I am happpy that a black man has made it to the presidency. That said, I don't give a damn that he's biracial, that he's black, that he's white. He is a MAN. Only a man, a very lucky and prophetic man, but man none the less. People put him on a pedestal and either stare up at him in awe or aim and shoot until he falls. Leave him the hell alone. Allow him to...
  11. Ditto Dido

    Dido once sang, "I will go down with this ship. I wo't put my hands high in surrender. There will be no white flag above my door, I'm in love, and always will be." I never thought I'd be that kind of girl, falling "blindly in love," not seeing beyond the eyes of the guy I find myself wanting so badly. Not that I am now, I'm just teetering too close to the edge of it all. Even in middle school, I couldn't date somebody I didn't see going anywhere. I'm not a gold-digger, I just figured...
  12. Leave Out All the Rest

    That is not only an allusion to my new favorite/mainstay song by Linkin Park- it also titles my latest observation in life. See, I try to live a good life, I've never done anything illegal, I work hard at most everything I do- but I can never shake this nagging feeling that, if I were to die tomorrow, there would be only a handful of people that would remember the person that is me ten years afterwards. It's not so much a rant of a depressed person- I've been counseled and declared "too...
  13. Method Writing

    I have often heard of actors whom "become" their current role as a way to better understand the character. I never would have thought that there was a such thing as a "Method Writer," but I think I am one. I realized this first when I started playing RPG- I felt like I was in the mind of my characters. I often had to remind myself that the members and their respective characters were not the same entities- and that I could not start fires with the mere thought of doing so, could have been...
  14. Give an inch, and a mile will grow

    show a little kid a pretty color and you've given her the rainbow show her a butterfly and she's seen a flitting fairy show her the moon she'll aim for the stars show her compassion and she'll know love show her a smile and she'll know joy show her the sun and she'll see the galaxy show her you care and she'll want for nothing
  15. Oh, you can see me?

    Sometimes I wonder if I exist at all, or if I'm just the figment of a collective imagination. I see that all those around me are alive, but I just survive. I can't live life to the fullest, and won't be able to change that- sadly. I wonder often, if I'm missing something, that Happy Teen Gene that so many seem to flaunt, but alas- I don't possess. I try to smile, it gets me nowhere. I try to laugh, it gets me nowhere. I try to blend in, but I can't. And, it seems, I have personalites...
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