A dose of terrible writing...

Published by Kimi-chan in the blog Autistic in Wonderland~. Views: 143

I notice when I write, I add a lot of emotional imagery yet I always fall at writing imagery that involves scenery. I wonder... if that's a bad thing... anyway... here is a rather LONG does of my writing. It's not the whole story but the emotional imagery that I am takling about...


Sayuri had no choice but to go with him to the hospital as he was taken by ambulance. The rest of them rode in the ambulance with paramedics until reaching the hospital. Sasuke was rushed in and placed on a respirator and IV fluids to keep him from getting worse.

"Excuse me but... is there anyway you can let Sayuri stay with her twin brother? It's really required they stay together because they can't be away from each other." Kusagi asked the girl at the front desk. "I think it would help a lot with Sasuke's recovery." He watched her get up and go into the other area and talk with the others nurse's and then come out.

"We don't allow having other people in ICU with the patients." The secretary had explained.

Sayuri started falling to the floor and sobbing when she couldn't see her brother. Her emotions started going completely astir as she clawed her arms and picked at her scars. Kusagi sighed as he went over to the lady and started explaining everything to her about the twins.

"You can't keep this twins apart. I mean sure, if you want to deal with this and also having him panic as well... and end up with an even <i>bigger</i> emergency, fine... but I'm not paying for her medical treatment." Kusagi shrugged. "I'm only trying to help understand the emotional issues they both suffer and realize that you just can't separate them." He told the nurse about Sayuri having an serious emotional disturbance, Post traumatic stress disorder and panic disorder.

"But... she's a minor. We can't allow minors, only an adult at her side and even then we only allow one person. I'm sorry but those are the rules." The secretary sat down at her desk as Sayuri started screaming and covering her head in a fetal position.

"Well, then I'm not going to stop her. I can't stop her because this is how she reacts." Kusagi watched as Sayuri screamed and sobbed louder into her legs; hugging them and wearing her brother's favorite jacket.

Sasuke's cat hoodie didn't make her feel any better as she wrapped herself inside of it and continued screaming and crying. Her fits were horrendous that even Kaimu couldn't calm her. Sayuri was eventually forced to be taken outside and that only increased her panic.

"You can't do this, you know. You are really neglecting the fact that Sayuri can't be without her brother and that's not making things better by kicking her out." Kusagi had to stay outside with her until she started panicking and losing her breath.

Sayuri hadn't taken her anti-anxiety meds because she had forgotten and they only helped a little. It was to the point where she was crying so much that her breath got shallow, her chest started hurting and she was coughing on the little air that wouldn't come out. Kusagi rushed her into the emergency room when she was finally placed next to her twin brother after passing out from the panic attack.


It's probably very poor and not worth your time so... yeah. It's the first time I've ever posted it among strangers but... eh...
  • Ixloriana
  • -Junebug-
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