Avoid being wordy!

Published by Nadala in the blog Nadala's blog. Views: 46

lets look at being wordy, man I'm addicted to blogging, someone should ban me from it. Anyhow. What is being wordy? look at the sentence below

Johnny hadn't been a good boy, in fact just this morning he had broken all his toys.

So what can you see? are there words that don't belong? maybe there is a way to make the sentence flow much better. Such as...

Johnny had been bad. (you're showing the start of the sentence instantly no dilly dally, shilly shally. It's a fact and is plan as day to see.) just this morning he had broken his toys.

You don't need words like, such as, in fact and but. These words just drag the sentence out. At times they confuse your reader. When you think you've found a sentence with problems like theses in your work read it aloud to yourself. Even to someone else who may pick up the problems. Sometimes one word can replace two. But don't let it lead to the dreaded adverb. here is an example.

Sally ran quickly, they were gaining on her.

Instead of using ran quickly. Find another word. Dashed, sprinted, hurried. They all explain the same scenario in less words and far more effectively.

Another common mistake is saying dashed Quickly. By dashing we've already established that the character is in a hurry no need for quickly.

Remember to always reread what you've written and be aware of wordiness and adverbs.
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