Chudz Blog 2

Published by Chudz in the blog Chudz's blog. Views: 98

Chudz Blog: (Entry 2) CB reporting . . .

Note: For the sake of brevity, Chudz Blog is now being referred to as “CB”, and Mr. Beanie Bear will mostly be referred to by his sobriquet of “Mr. B”.

(The Scene: Our three characters have dragged the charred mini-fridge out of the tower and into a nearby, deserted field, where Chudz is delivering a eulogy.)

Chudz says: It was a good fridge and a brave fridge. It steadfastly cooled our . . . sniffle . . . beer through all seasons, never faltering once. We will miss our fridge, our friend, our ever cooling companion in the days ahead. But we must be steadfast ourselves and resolute in our determination to move on. Fare you well, our lovely mini-fridge.

Mr. B. blows his nose into a Smokey the Bear hankie. HONK!

CB wipes a mechanical tear from his eye and transforms into a back-hoe, in order to dig the last resting place for the mini-fridge.

Chudz says: A mechanical, transforming blog . . . that was truly an outstanding idea you had there, Mr. B.

Mr. B. grins like the Chessire Cat.

(The Scene: The mini-fridge has been buried. CB has transformed back into his usual mechanical-looking, Frankenstein-type self. And Chudz is busily counting up the beers—that were put on life-support—in an ice-filled washtub.)

Chudz says: Hey guys, there’s 42 beers here. Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

Mr. B. is thinking about two female bears and a hot-tub full of honey.

CB says: Two 21 beer salutes?

Mr. B. puts the hot-tub thought on hold.

Chudz shouts: Let’s do it!

(The Scene: An hour or two has passed, and the ground is now littered with empty beer cans. Mr. B. is sprawled out on his back, tongue lolling out one side of his mouth, snoring loudly. Chudz is passed out, hugging the empty washtub. And CB has transformed into something resembling a reclining chair and a lawn mower.)

Farmer Jenkins pulls up in his old pick-up truck and honks the horn. HONK!

Mr. B. launches himself into the air, thinking Goldilocks is after him.

CB whirls through several transformations, until he’s finally back to normal, with a little dizziness added in.

Chudz pats the washtub affectionately.

Chudz mumbles: I love you too, baby. . . .

Farmer Jenkins honks the horn again. HONK!

Chudz wakes up and looks around, bleary eyed, until he notices Farmer Jenkins.

Farmer Jenkins pokes his head out through the side window of his truck

Farmer Jenkins says: If’n you miscreants dun buried another mini-fridge in mah field, I’ma gonna shoot you fulla rock salt again!

Mr. B. thinks, Yoinks!

Chudz gulps.

CB says: Again?

Farmer Jenkins lets out a sigh and reaches toward his gun rack, and the waiting shotgun.

Chudz yells: RUN!

(The scene ends as Farmer Jenkins is fishtailing through the field, steering with one hand while shooting at our former mourners, who are scrambling back toward the tower.)
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