When I was a child, I knew I could fly, and so I did because it was fun. "Don't!" I was told. "You are supposed to be a person, so act like one. People don't fly. People walk." Walking was hard, especially when I got all excited, keeping my feet firmly on the ground was a challenge. Conversely, at times the gravity of the situation weighed me down so much, I could not walk, too tired to expand the gigantic effort it took to lift my feet off the ground. Most people did not have this problem, I understood.
So I started observing other people closely constantly. What I observed though was that none of the others really observed people. In fact, I was told not to do that either, even more adamantly than against the flying, observing creeped people out.
"But if no one is observing, why can't I fly or at least float? Maybe no one will notice?" I was assured that they would notice. They never noticed anyone when they were doing ordinary things, and all was well. But if anyone did something extraordinary, it would have to be noticed, and disapproved, presumably in part at least because it forced ordinary people to stop and observe someone.
"Do people not want to be noticed?" I enquired. "Oh, quite the contrary: they all desperately want to be noticed, and most never are. But they don't like to be observed."
So I had to learn to have the proper perspective on gravity without observing people. I did it by studying up about it in books. Before long I found myself buried in high level physics research books with my nose in the book all the time. I panicked when I realized that no one else around me was doing that either. Expecting the worst, I was instead reassured that being a nerd was perfectly fine: yes, it was not ordinary, but it was easy for people to dismiss, especially since they had this handy four letter word to dismiss it with.
Reading was fun but I felt the need to create, to pour out my soul and mold it into a new shape. Not allowed. I guess people didn't do that either. The closest thing to it I was allowed to do was write. So here I am, writing, while wishing I could fly.
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