Dora the freaking Explorer.

By Brightsmiles · Jul 15, 2009 · ·
  1. Okay. If you hadn't guessed, this is a MAJOR rant.

    you know that little cartoon character with the big brown eyes, purple backpack and singing map? You know, the one with the cute little voice that sings, and finds stars with the help of her best monkey friend (who's name is boots by the way)

    Well, if you hadn't guessed, her name is dora the freaking explorer, and she's making me want to be extremely violent atm!

    I have a three year old who'd decided she *only* wants to speak spanish (i'm in australia, where the heck is she gonna use that???) and who keeps randomly screaming out every word she knows like Mr Bean does in that episode where he's singing at church and only belts out the chorus.

    then my 18 month old, who is only using one word sentences, is now saying 'backpack' in the most retarded way, and then laughing hysterically everytime she does it. Now if it weren't so cute that she was cracking herself up, i woulda gagged her with the pacifier by now, and yes, possibly used a sock to keep it there!

    and you know what's even better? my charming husband, who thought he was being so sweet and thoughtful, has brought home a freaking 95 minute dora DVD!!! which has already been played three times today!!!

    my current facebook update says something along the lines of wanting to rip my eye balls out and shove them down my ears. i would say that i should just be thankful for the peace, but really, when i'm getting half coherent spanish and hysterical laughter combined with a screeched 'backpack' there's not much peace to be had.

    somethings going to go over the balcony if this doesn't stop, and somehow i think the girls would rather it me than their precious dvd. i'm thinking i need to fake a blackout.

    *serenity now* *serenity now* *serenity now*

Comments

  1. Rumpole40k
    In my house, it was a 15 min episode of Word World called Pies, Pies, Pies. My son learned the one button he had to press to make this episode repeat ad nauseum. At one point, I began plotting the death of the characters.
  2. Brightsmiles
    lol R! at least mine is only three episodes worth, so it takes a while for each to come around again. you have my deepest sympathies! lol.
  3. Rumpole40k
    and you have mine. (But your blog made me burst out laughing because I could just imagine little Rumpole doing all those things).
  4. becca
    My son is currently in love with the Dora show. He is 4. I had him restricted to the disney channel for a long time, but he got tired of those shows, and then he discovered Dora. Lately he is mad whenever she isn't on. He keeps screaming he wants to watch Dora, and I tell him that he can't watch her because she isn't on.

    Previously we were totally, obcessively in love with Thomas the train. My hub and I got tired of the TV constantly being Thomas, so we got him a portable DVD player that he could watch his videos on and we could still watch TV.

    NOW my hubs dad got a new TV, and gave us his old one, so the little guy has his own TV in his playroom, so I don't have to hear all the little people stuff anymore, it's wonderful.
  5. Brightsmiles
    lol becca. sounds like a good idea :D
  6. Kirvee
    I can't relate on a maternal basis, but I can recommend you a few shows they could watch (at your decision) that are far less irritating than Dora if they pick something up to mimic.

    - Darkwing Duck
    - Talespin
    - Ducktales
    - Animaniacs
    - Freakazoid
    - SWAT Kats
    - Gargoyles (maybe when they're 5....)
    - Sonic The Hedgehog (cartoon)
    - Sonic Underground
    - Chip n Dale Rescue Rangers
    - Captain Planet
    - Tiny Toons/Tiny Toon Adventures

    Or, if you'd prefer they watch girly cartoons and less cartoons that were made for boys (I watched those, personally, and loved them a lot), then you could always hunt for videos of the old "My Little Pony" cartoons. Or Carebears. Either of those two are MUCH more entertaining than Dora the Stereotype.

    All/most of those cartoons are from the 90's, the age where cartoons were actually good to watch for everyone and not just for the little brainwashed kids (like 95% of cartoons these days are...).

    It's up to you whether you want to let them watch any of those shows or not, and most of them can now be bought in DVD sets. Hope I helped in some way.

    Edit:

    There's also Goof Troop which was a pretty cool series they might like. "Bonkers" is another awesome cartoon they could watch.

    Also, if you or your kids aren't easily creeped out, Beetlejuice (the cartoon) was a pretty awesome series. Or maybe I was just a really weird little kid....

    And, if you don't mind anime, Hamtaro is a nice little kid-aged anime. Granted if you can find any videos/DVDs.

    Oh, and if you're ever curious about any of these titles, Youtube has pretty much every intro to each show in this comment and Wikipedia is your friend (in this case).
  7. Lavarian
    I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map.

    I'M THE MAP!
  8. marina
    Go watch Teletubbies (I'm told I loved them). It'll make you feel grateful for Dora, I'm sure.
  9. Kirvee
    I am not editing my comment again....

    One more show:

    - Time Squad

    Not only was it funny, but it was actually a little educational. I learned a thing or two from watching that show as a little kid. Like how Thomas Washington found over 100 uses for the peanut. That show made history enjoyable, unlike school.
  10. Brightsmiles
    lmao kirvee. uh, i get the strong impression you sent your folks nuts too once upon a time! lol.

    lavarian, lavarian, lavarian. what can i say? either you've been driven nuts by it, or you simply are nuts for knowing it! LOL ;D

    thanks for the sympathies folkes. its a new day, they've been up two hours, and already begging for it, but i've been a meany and making em watch land before time and curious george first, then play time outside. never knew a three year could give such dirty looks! lol.
  11. Kirvee
    The Land Before Time is an excellent movie for them to watch.

    And I may've driven my parents bonkers because I was a weird kid and had more severe AS back then, but I can assure you that all the shows I've recommended are a lot better to listen to than Dora the Stereotypical Spaniard.

    Anything your kids might mimic from any of those cartoons is about 10x better and less mind grating than anything they copy or could copy from Dora.
  12. becca
    Something that works for me if I want to 'delay' something, or if my son just can't watch it right then because it isn't on, is I tell him they are taking a nap. Sometime I tell him something is broken and he can't watch it.

    I know, it's naughty of me, but it helps us have fewer melt downs. It get really interesting when he says no, and that they need to wake up. LOL
  13. Brightsmiles
    lol becca!

    unless its unplugged at the wall, my little terror can turn it on! at the tv, and via remote. she even knows where the flip piece is to change channels directly on the tv!

    technology and kids these days...

    the nap idea is a good one though... thanks for that one! :D
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