Hey don't get me wrong. I'm sure gays are nice people and I really don't care what they get up to in their free time. It's just this marriage thing. Like envious neighbours. "Mum, mum, they got a big Plasma screen TV. Can we get one?" Well, they can have marriage anyway. Half end in divorce and a lot don't even get round to it, despite having kids. I'm one of the survivors. First marriage and going on 30 years now with good ol' Bess. Now Bess, there's what I class a real woman. Homemaker. No fancy aspirations to a career. Her happiness is to make a comfortable nest for me and her. They don't make women like this anymore, I assure you. She belongs to a breed soon to be extinct. The selfless woman variety. God bless her. Ok we didn't have kids and don't expect an apology from me 'cause you're not goin' to get one!
And another thing. Stop the boats! I'd add stop the planes too! Australia doesn't want any more migrants. That includes radicalised Poms who think they can beat us in cricket and rugby! We don't need your kind here. Stay in that cold, wet part of the world forever and watch repeats of the Antique Roadshow on TV . And then watch Eggheads after that. Barry's my favourite by the way.
I have it on good authority that our ex-prime minister, Tony Abbott was born in England. if that's the case, we return to sender. You can have him back. He's too much of a monarchist! Oh say hi to Liz for me by the way. How old is she now? 100 yet? She's in the nervous ninetees . Hope she gets her century!
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