Frog Prince; the Real Story

Had a little fun with this one, please comment and tell me what you think! Thanks!



A beautiful woman, in figure and in spirit, walked delightedly through the forest with no place specific to be. She had a wonderful smile strewn about her perfect little face. Her walk was thrown off beat and her smile turned to awe when she heard a voice.

“Aye you!” She turned around and to her surprise she saw a whole lot of nothing behind her. “Aye, down here!” Expecting a dwarf… or even a midget, she looked down to find a small frog. “Help a frog out?” He asked her with a little frog smile. She shrugged and lowered herself to the talking animal. “You seem like a very nice lady. You have a nice smile, you smell nice, you’re pretty, you dress nice… Oh and that necklace is just marvelous! That clearly must be pure gold embedded with diamonds?!” she blushed and nodded in embarrassment from his complements. Her hand reached up for her necklace, as if it were a habit for her. Almost like source of comfort.

“Well I need your help!” the small frog exclaimed. “You see, I am a prince of all the land! It is I that has dedicated myself to protect the innocent and even the very forest you roam in! An evil crime has been committed to royalty, for a dark, ugly Witch has changed me. She transformed me into… this… The Witches term for reversal was to kiss a beautiful woman. Now she didn’t specify ‘beauty’, but you are definitely a solid 8.” The wanderer pondered on how she should take that comment. After some thinking, she just smiled and blushed some more.

“I can repay you! Give me this one kiss, and all the riches you could ever want will be at your fingertips! We might want keep this on the ‘down low’ though, because I am basically positive this is some form of… well never mind” The woman giggled and blushed yet again, her blonde hair bouncing along with her laughter. “So, will you help me?” The woman nodded in agreement. She puckered up her lips and bent to kiss the frog.

“Wait wait wait!” the frog announced and the girl jumped back, a little startled. “After the best kiss of your life, because clearly kissing a prince is the only complete and utter true form of satisfaction, I must go behind those bushes over there. If only that witch hadn’t taken my clothing, you could witness this wonder of a transformation. I just wouldn’t want to overwhelm you with too many heavenly things in one day!” the frog gave the woman a wink. She giggled and turned red as a tomato.

“Ok, ready? Here we go!” she raised the frog in the palm of her hand to her face, and brought his slimy mouth, which resembled nothing of a prince, and pressed him right up to her soft, red lips. She looked at him and studied him. He looked misshaped… His head seemed slightly fatter! His cheeks gave a bulge and his mouth was formed into a definite smile. He must be transforming!

He hopped off of her hand, and awkwardly bounced his way to a nearby bush, thanking her in a mangled, disturbing voice. She had done something great that will be remembered in stories forever! She had saved the prince of the land and everyone in the kingdom will welcome her and through parties and have a national frog kissing day! She felt so delighted! She felt lighter, not physically, but mentally. Like a burden had been lifted. But as she thought about it… she did feel lighter physically. She looked herself up and down, trying to figure out what it was. She raised her hand up to her neck to feel the comfort in her necklace… but all she felt was the soft skin of her chest… THAT FROG! She ran behind the bush to find the little green, scandal of a monster. All she found was a note. The note read: Dear woman. You are an 8 in the face, but a 3 in the lips. Practice makes perfect. –the fraud prince.