In Which I Demonstrate the Proper Use of a Metaphor
Published by Atari in the blog Nothing Better to Do Than Read Blogs? Then this is the Blog for You!. Views: 102
I was hanging around with some music fanatics and was forcefully subjected to endure the endless whining of self-proclaimed musical zealots calling each other names and launching hate-injected insults at each other's taste in music in much the same fashion that six-year-olds slap at each other until one of them gets in a lucky hit and makes the other kid cry.
Amidst all of the idiocy, I found a gap, a crevice about the size of a quarter from wherewith a shaft of light broke through. Curious, I slowly waded my way through this flood of idiocy, inching toward the hole as if struggling against a persisting wave of a large body of water.
Finally, I made it and was able to put my face against the floor and peer into the hole, only to have someone jag a sharp object into my eyeball.
Turns out that beneath all of that idiocy is another, deeper layer, filled with stupidity.
And below that is a place filled with teenage girls who don't know good music from a nail on a rusty, metal chalkboard covered in sandpaper scattered with gravel over a hardened layer of concrete.
Not just any concrete, but the same concrete used on the remnants of a broken pane of glass that had been shattered using the carcass of a rigor mortis-stricken porcupine.
Apparently, a ghost asked her what her favorite song was. I say it was a ghost because I neither heard nor saw anyone requesting that she announce aloud the song she likes most.
She says it is 'Kiss Kiss by Chris Brown'.
Had she left it there, we would all have walked away with all of our brain cells, but she had to go and tell us why, exactly, this is her favorite song.
She said it is because 'he is so hot'.
Right, me too.
After standing there like that for five minutes I had to actively restrain myself from bludgeoning her in the head with a door I found.
She honestly likes that song because she is attracted the person who sings it, or even if she's not, none of us asked her what she thought about the attractiveness of the singer.
My guess as to why she said it?
Ghosts. Ghosts are to blame for everything. I'm moving to Detroit. I hear the ghosts up there shut up and leave you alone.
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