My Happy Place

I know people who wake up joyous. They are eager to talk and get started early in the morning. I'm not one of them. Never have been and probably never will be; I find it annoying when they spread that morning happiness around me.

I wonder if its real. Are they putting on airs of being happy, or does happiness get swallowed from that swirling cup of coffee? The mind loves denial. I cringe and wonder if they 'check in' to that happy place so they can alter reality.

"Go bother the morning people," I want to shout and push everyone away. Can a body have a minute alone with the misery of waking out of peaceful sleep. My consciousness crosses back to this side and seeps into my avatar that's been waiting here unconsciously. Thankfully, however, the world fails to shock me now so this process of waking has become less "painful."

What makes me happy, though, is not found in a place that I control. Do you know how long it took me to realize that? Happiness - for me - is found in the faces of children. Their beautiful eyes, mannerisms, voices, and laughter. It's shameful what happens to all that energy and spirit as we get older.

Thank god we die. Death to some adults doesn't come soon enough. I wonder when I'll die.