On My Feet Again.

By GrahamLewis · Jun 24, 2018 · 506 · 3

On the ground again.

Two miles up in a bright blue cloud-touched sky, the wind whipping by at 120 miles per hour, one hand on the side of the door, one on a strap from the ceiling, one foot on the step outside the plane. Then whoosh. Into the sky, sort of spinning, almost tumbling. I straighten out, and look out over a patchwork of green and brown fields, bright green trees and a surprisingly dark river. One full minute of falling, head arched back, arms extended, legs bent. A surprising calm within. Almost observation without an observer.

Then, with an unexpected surge of disappointment (and a bit of unwelcome sudden tightening of straps in a delicate area) the chute whumps open, and all slows down. Four or five more minutes, then a gentle bumping slide across grass.

Six minutes of my life that in some ways seemed to last forever, in others to end far too soon. One more check on the bucket list. And a notch on my courage stick.

NB -- it was a tandem jump - as required, I had an experienced diver strapped to my back in charge of the details. But still . . . . .
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More than 24 hours later, and it's still alive for me. In a weird, background sort of way. I did something I never thought I would really do, and I did it with a sense of determination, no fear or second thoughts. All the way up I wondered when reality would strike -- I didn't realize reality was out there, in the falling and the the beauty of the world unfolding beneath me, and the surge of life. My worry-mind never spoke, never insinuated that the parachute might not open. I was lost in flight, and far from time and my everyday world. When the chute opened, I felt not relief but loss. I'd forgotten I was falling at more than 100 miles per hour, and that the unforgiving ground was fast approaching.

I was in flight and that was all that mattered.

I don't think I ever experienced a sense of exhilaration, just of deep being, and that has stayed with me. I'm still in and of this world, but I seem to have touched something bigger.

The web is alive with references to Zen and skydiving, and you know what? To the extent that I understand the incomprehensible nature of Zen, I believe I experienced it.

GrahamLewis, Jun 26, 2018
When the chute opened, I felt not relief but loss.

Congratulations by the way graham. Good effort. I wonder if I would have the same reaction as you. I wonder if others would feel the same as you.

paperbackwriter, Jun 27, 2018
I didn't really talk to any other first-timers, but no one seemed traumatized and of course the ones who work there do it regularly and they say they love it. They do say everyone approaches it differently and part of the point is to confront and overcome your natural fear of falling,

GrahamLewis, Jun 27, 2018

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On My Feet Again.

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