The Birds and The Bees

Today I was lying on the grass in between classes because it's nice out and I have these heinous 1.5 hour gaps in between classes which forces me to remain on campus from 8 to 5. So, I saw this fat little bird bouncing around on the grass and I had this insane urge to pick it up and squeeze it. Not like a big squeeze, just a little one. Like if you were to hold a water balloon in your hand and squeeze it just to squeeze it not to pop it or anything. Anyway, so, I tried to make it come to me but apparently robins aren't very good with commands so that didn't work out so well. I don't think it would have liked being squeezed anyhow... it probably would have misunderstood my intentions. Conclusion: I want to squeeze a wild bird for my birthday.

Afterward, I called up my friend and some how came upon the topic of what we want to do with our lives. Recently I've been seriously considering dropping out of school, going to mexico, and becoming a scuba instructor - not exactly sure what the rents would think about that after paying for 3 years of college so I decided not to push the idea. So, after telling her about the bird, we briefly discussed the difficulties associated with training a wild bird to come when called. THEN I saw a bunch of bees flying around and thought - what if I decided to train bees for a living? What if you could train bees to come to you and do tricks and maybe even sting people on command? That would be a real skill to develop.

However, I am allergic to bees, so I am afraid that dream can never be realized.