Throwing Tantrums (It’s just one of those days.)
Is it just me, or are these guys seriously avoiding me on purpose? Seriously, what did I ever do to deserve this kind of public exile? One day they're talking and laughing with me, and the next few days they just breeze past without even a word. They’ll talk to my friends and everyone else around me but give me the cold shoulder, like I’m a leper or something. If I squint hard enough, I bet I could see icicles forming in the space between us.
At times like that I feel like extending my foot to trip them when they attempt to bail on me. But then I'd look totally ridiculous for getting baited into unleashing my fury by a couple of pranksters. And, really, they must be pranksters because they weren’t acting like that when PF was around.
Why can't it just be simple? I mean, I just turned twenty-six less than two and a half months ago, and for some reason I’m tired of playing these silly games with people who may or not may not be interested in me. Look at what became of AY and me: We got nowhere. Obi puts it best. She chirps, “Nothing can come between us,” and I have to nod in agreement every time I hear that line because, yes, she is absolutely right. Nothing can come between something that doesn’t exist.
So tell me what is up with this hot-and-cold/hard-to-get/flirty-one-moment-then-ignoring-me-the-next game that these guys are playing, huh? I'm human; I have feelings too, you know? If you don't like me, fine; if you just want to be friends, fine. No problem. I get the picture.
It’s just, we were having so much fun together, and I got my hopes up thinking I was finally going to make some friends who won’t diss me at every opportunity they get, and then when I finally get the nerve to approach them – Whoosh! – There they go, circling away from me like I’m a vicious python about to swallow them whole, and they’re the ones who have to ward me off with the forked stick.
Anyway, that’s not the point. The point is I just want to meet that 100% perfect guy for me in the simplest of simple ways: No need for “birds [to] suddenly appear”, or for stars to fall down from the sky. He'd just stop me by the exit before I leave and be like, "Hey, um, my name's..." and struggle a bit before finally getting it out, and I'd laugh and say, "You have to think about your own name?" And he'd say, "No, it's just, I'm a little nervous." And there would be this beautifully awkward silence as the thought mutually registers in our minds, and then I’d slowly smile and extend my hand for him to shake.
No, simpler than that: Every time he sees me, he will come up to say, “Hi.” And every time I see him, I will do the same.
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