Get your hybrid and e-cig and bathroom that runs on poopoo out of my life, you moron.
On a pretty major intersection on El Molino Ave, CA 91106, (just to give you a visual), an idiot noob in a white annoying Prius turns sharp left while I'm going straight. We collide past the middle of the intersection. Slight bump. I survived with a minor scratch on the front left bumper because I'm a genius driver. I drive like I'm a dood. Don't get feminist on me. My mom drives like she is Korean. She is Korean, relative newbie to America.
My "beh emm veh" has the battle scars of a pro, and the missing license plate lends color and credibility to my image. Nowadays, I like to think I have "an angel on my shoulder but a devil in my head".
The other driver got wheeled away on a stretcher. Hysterical. Freaking out and jumping around sweating. Engine smoking. Thank god the guy didn't pass out. I couldn't even get his info properly. Might have seemed inappropriate.
He is sucha nubbly wubbly, doods. He can probably can take can take credit for THIS:
"2012 Toyota Prius Two
Written by: tommyterrific on Oct 11, 2012 1:51:35 PM
Hello Everybody, We just purchased this car 2 days ago, and were given the "HARD sell" to purchase an extended warranty. What does anybody have for an opinion on this matter? Thanks, TT"
Bottom line: Thank you GAWD for my life, my boring days, and the fact that I was paying attention.
Driving is all about attention span. That's really all there is to it. People who space out or go manic-depressive or paranoid on the road better not dare judge my Bimmer, or come close enough to look at my school tramp stamp on my butt.
People get rationally furious in an accident. The car, and the institution of "safety" and "adulthood" failed you. Nothing is infallible. You're not special. It really does happen to you. Oh btw man, you have cancer because you smoke and you lied when you said you only smoke e-cigs.
I love how I had to hand in my interim driver license to the police officer. Single, btw. Made fun of my "interim" paper license.
Him: So where's your REAL license?
Him: Ahhh. You're one of those new drivers.
Him: So you have an INTERIM license?
He's lucky he's cute. Or I woulda slugged him. No really, I would have. I could have. I should have.
Omgosh. I think he's into me. He gave me his card. Has his name on it and number and everything!!!!! Maybe I should ask him what is a better name for our third child: Lucy or Charlie (both girl names. Eff you.) Oh and if he doesn't want to shave the heads of our babies, then so be it. It's not meant to be. My aunt shaved my cousin's head twice when she was a baby. People thought she was a dood baby, but she now has thick, super cool hair.
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