The Not Happy Thread

@Lea`Brooks Are we assisting in your eviction decision?

 

I think I was drunk at the time. Nasty memories. Let's not revisit them, please.

No girl on this planet wants to touch his ass, Moosie. Not even the trashiest, whitest trailer park-living Alabamian woman you can find.

I hope we are.

 

No idea who she is, but I'm from the Deep South. I get to joke about my own region. The day we no longer get to laugh at ourselves every once in a while is the day humor has truly died.

@big soft moose - I concur. Let's convene a forum get-together in Virginia, march on the estate and kick his lazy white ass out!

 

Once we sort the Porto Ricans.

 

Actually he did have a girl come over pretty often for a while. My husband thinks she's the one who brought them in the house. And now that I think about it, she hasn't been around for a few months...

 

OK, new plan, @matwoolf and @big soft moose . We'll divert our troops. One half will deal with the 'Ricans who tried to flatten poor Wrey and the others will mount an assault on LazyAss McBaby.

 

I've wanted him gone for a while now, but he's my husband's best friend. It's hard for him to see these negatives that I see. And since we can't really afford to live without him and my husband doesn't want a stranger living with us, we may be stuck with him for a while.

 

Or Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light.

 

Yup.

Unfortunately, my husband doesn't see it that way. Just picked him up from work and he isn't blaming our roommate at all. "They could've come from someone in the building. They could've been here when we moved in. You could've brought them home." He doesn't understand why I'm so upset. And he said he wouldn't feel right kicking him out, as he's his only support system.

So I asked him. Are we just going to live with him forever?

He said he didn't wanna talk about it anymore.

 

Oh goody, he's siding with Mr. LazyAss McBaby and he doesn't want to talk about it. Despite clear evidence of the guy's mattress being the perpetrator of the bedbug infestation. Despite clear evidence that he's acting like a teen despite being thirty frickin' years old and freeloading you two like you're his mommy and daddy.

I sense he's only doing this because he thinks the guy as a best friend. Let me clue him in on something: REAL best friends don't make the friends he's living with have to suffer because of his presence. In any way. He's using your husband just as much as he's using you -- using his friendship to his advantage.

 

Bloody hell, LazyAss McBaby is on a winner here.

If you can't get hubby on side to boot him now I'd be laying some firm as fuck ground rules. Who's to say it won't all happen again?

I'd be writing up a list of conditions to come into force when the the home is debugged. I'd be requiring LazyAss to keep his damn room clean (have weekly inspections), do his share of housework (itemise it) and pay his damn rent (amount and date due). You may not be able to prove he's the bedbug bringer but considering the state of his mattress I'd be calling him on it and demanding he contribute one third of the $1250. I'd break it down into affordable amounts and add it to his rent payments. I'd be including the consequences of any unmet conditions - eviction with two weeks notice. I'd write it up in a nice big bold font, insist he sign it (otherwise he can start packing now), make a copy, laminate it, and put it on the fridge.

And I'd be telling hubby he better start going along with me or he'd be the one responsible when our relationship starts going to shit.

 

....Can I just have you come over and do all that for me? You make it sound so easy. lol

 

@Lea`Brooks

He might be a terrible roommate in real life but he sure does sound like a great person to base a fictional sidekick on. One of those useless comedic number two's that is always like teamed with someone who is slightly smarter and more logical. So, there is that if you ever wanna write a buddy story.

 

Yeah I know it's a lot easier for me to spout off what I'd do when I'm not in your situation.

But it's not right that you're expected to put up with this crap. I hope you can get things running more reasonably somehow.

 

Oh shizzle, I have romantic feelings again. I don't know how to handle these.
Someone make them go away!

 

I'm glad others agree this isn't right. Because my husband just does not see it. He didn't say anything to our roommate until two minutes ago, and it was to tell him he'd get some spray for his bed and literally give him a pat on the back.

It seriously breaks my heart. My husband is supposed to have my back. And I feel like when I comes to me and Mike, Mike always comes first and I'm second. I just spent three years in a relationship like that and left it because of that reason. I don't want to go through that again. I didn't sign on to this. I married my husband because I wanted to spend my life with him. I didn't realize I was adopting his best friend too.

So now I feel like I'm wrong and that I shouldn't be upset about this and that I should understand how embarrassing this must be for Mike because, according to my husband, "I'm sure he feels bad." No, I'm not sure of that because he didn't say anything and went back to his computer afterward like everything was fine. He hasn't tried to clean his bed. He hasn't gone out to buy a spray. He hasn't apologized or shown any remorse. He hasn't offered to pay us back. So how would I assume he feels bad? What has he done to show that?

So now I'm feeling isolated and alone when I should be feeling supported. And I don't know what to do anymore.

 

It sounds like a hell of a situation. Could you tackle it from a different angle? Any chance of looking at moving to a new place at some stage? A smaller place where you wouldn't need/couldn't have a roomie. This might only be possible down the track but it could be a tunnel light for you. (I know you shouldn't have to move but if it's gonna keep you sane.)

Plus what Homer says.