The Not Happy Thread

I can't take someones comedy gold! What kind of woman do you take me for?

My TV is tiny, but has a built in DVD. I wouldn't have needed a TV at all if it wasn't because of my Xbox one. At the day we bought it (me and the ex together) I put a claim on it. If we were ever to break up it would be mine. Since we were happy and in love he agreed willingly. Sucker.

 

A little frustrated that I've been in Texas for a month now and still haven't found a job... though that has led to me having more time to write and read so I guess there's always a silver lining!!

If you pray please pray I find a job soon... if not please send any good thoughts you have my way as I would prefer not to starve and I know my family can say they same!!

 

I've been more or less unemployed for the past two years. While I did have rather steady job last summer, the rest of the times have been hundreds of applications, countless interviews and plenty of odd-jobs that caused more pain than pay. Did I mention the unpaid jobs? Don't get me started on those.

While I sympathize - one month is NOTHING when it comes to job hunts.

Yes, I'm really bitter. Like extremely bitter.

 

You can survive being unemployed in those northern countries though, right?

 

Lol well I have all the episodes ripped anyway, so owning the actual media is more of formality

I do kinda second the lack of need for a TV though. My ex kept my old one, the only reason I have one now is because my sister is moving to somewhere rather smaller so I got the TV from their guest bedroom (and the bed as well).

You made the right call btw; if you must keep one remember that your xbox will always love you

 

Maybe better than the US - but no, we don't survive being unemployed. The only reason I've managed this far was my ex, saving up from old jobs, odd jobs and that I (while sucking at math) am quite good to balance my economics.

Though noodles and oatmeal is cheap, so I'll survive a few more weeks.

I'm... not really the pirate kind.

Well, look who stood by me! It's not very hugable, but that aside I much prefer it to my ex. Plus I mainly play Fallout. So I get the sweet talking of romances while I get to shoot things in the head. So I'm happy.

 

I literally have a pirate hat on my desk right this moment. I'll say no more

Well quite. And seriously, bricks of plastic are more huggable than people give them credit for. Plus shooting people in the head is romantic, don't care what anyone says

 

Boys

On the pirate thing. The shooting I agree 100%

 

I'll have you know I look dashing with a cutlass

 

To be honest... I don't think that is the first time I "heard" that line. What's with men and bragging about their weirdly shaped swords?

 

Hey hey... Nothing weird about being slightly curved!

You know, years back a friend of mine used to brag that his *ahem* sword was perfectly anatomically shaped to amaze and astound young ladies. A while later I asked his ex if this was true. Her response was "Well it is a bit of a funny shape".

 

How would she know? What makes her such an expert in male ahems? An examination of a man's codpiece drawer, no matter how thorough, doesn't count.

 

I thought ahems were supposed to be weird and kinda funny. Not super funny, just a little slapstick, maybe even gag worthy.

 

It would take a rather remarkable young lady to have encountered a statistically significant sample of the human male population. Especially naked and well along on the path to full ahemness.

 

In my teens I knew this almost painfully adorable couple. Some time later she had started dating someone else, so I asked what happened to the old boyfriend. She had dumped him due to the shape of his - HEY AREN'T WE ALL GROWN UPS IN HERE? - sword.

I felt bad for the guy.

With all the pictures of sharp shiny weapons that women gets sent these days, I think anyone can be an expert!

 

The girl was something of a fencing mistress in her own right; a swordswoman of renown if you will. If anyone knows what's weird and what's just taste then it's her.

Some people find sword swallowing to be an artistic endeavour to be cherished and encouraged. But each to their own.

 

I think the word you're looking for is pastime...

 

You mean she carried a sword of her own? That would certainly give her a heads up.

 

Really? Is that the word? I mean... In a strict sense, yes, it does pass the time. But that doesn't quite cut to the quick of why people do it for me. Call me a stickler; perhaps even call me a purist; but for me it's more an... Exaltation. A celebration even. A meeting of... Tonsils?

Sorry what was I talking about?

 

One day you can get me drunk and I'll tell you all my stories about her. She wasn't quite born with a sword in her hand, but she acquired a number of her own weapons, some of which graduated out of being a sword and were well into polearm territory.

 

You could keep the stories if you gave me her number.