Things That Annoy Me, But Shouldn't

I wish I could go back in time to find out if people actually used to have better manners.

 

And now the truth comes out. Modern day life is just one big competition between strangers for space. On the airplanes, on the roads, in the supermarket aisles...

 

It's the same when you either bump trolleys or step to the same side when passing each other in the aisle. I say, "Oops, sorry!" and they don't say a word. Every nerve in my body is saying go back and ask them where their apology is?

 

So this is how you grocery shop, interesting...

 

I was there and oh yes, they did. Where I lived anyway, the social rules were strict and if you didn't follow them, things would not go well for you. You would be dropped from your friend circle, which was more important back then because people visited each other far more than they went out to other places for amusement. There weren't that many places to go and there either was no TV yet or it only had like three channels. And besides, if you wasted too much money on frivolous entertainment, people would talk about you for that, too. Everything was under those strict expectations of the correct way to live.

All of my grandparents got dressed up whenever they left the house, and people would not be seen (or allowed) in restaurants, etc. in shorts and baseball caps. No one went around dropping f-bombs, especially around children or men around women. If someone invited you over, it was your turn to invite them over next time. And from an earlier topic on this thread, gift-giving had clear rules, too. No asking for gifts (although I'd imagine prostitutes did anyway lol). If you talked at the movies, the whole place would shush you or an usher would come up and shine a flashlight in your face in front of everyone. Children were taught a certain way to answer the telephone (Hello, Berg residence. Carly speaking). And if a neighbor or teacher called your parents about you, you were getting a butt whipping when you got home, end of story. It all started to change in the late 60's-early 70's.

But of course there was a flip side to that rigid social control and hierarchy, too. It was not limited to manners but covered the big things, too. Not only would you be judged on every little thing, but hardly anyone kept an out-of-wedlock baby or came out of the closet, whites didn't mix with blacks, and if a woman tried to buy anything expensive, she'd likely be told to come back with her husband. Police generally didn't get involved in familial abuse situations. Etc.

People do get on my nerves because these days they do frequently seem rude and like they only care about themselves. And it gets confusing. You used to know what you were supposed to do in a given situation, which made it easier to navigate socially. But when I think about the rest of it, I think we actually do treat each other better overall.

 

We used to have a huge book of etiquette in our house - I think it was Emily Post, but it might have been someone else. But years and years later I can still remember the introduction, which said that the ultimate point of etiquette was to make people feel comfortable. Outrageous ethical issues aside, if you have a choice between rigid etiquette and making someone else feel comfortable and unembarrassed, then the right etiquette, the true courtesy and manners, demanded that you make the other person comfortable, rules be damned.

I've always liked that view on manners.

 

I always, always call people out on that. It astonishes me the number of people who don't say "thank you" when you let them past first or hold the door open for them, or who don't say "sorry" when you bump into each other. I don't give a shit how important that person thinks he/she is, I will do my utmost to draw attention very publicly to their impolite (lack of) response and how they should have responded, with the aim of publicly shaming them. I'm coming to the conclusion that most people don't give a shit about people they don't know, and I think they should be embarrassed about that.

 

Friends are hard - and I feel like any friends would be better than no friends because otherwise I'd be all alone.

I wasn't the host. Maybe I used the wrong word. I just didn't feel like going.

The party died down before it started, so nothing bad (or good for that matter) happened last night.

If I didn't let people treat me badly I'd be out of people to treat me at all... I might just be a kind of doormat personality. So feel free to walk all over me, I guess?

 

You would rather let people treat you badly than be alone? What's so scary about being alone?

You deserve so much better than that, @Lemie . You're a very kind, sweet person. Set the terms for your own life. Don't give those assholes the control.

 

I don't like being alone. I used to be too scared to leave my own apartment and meet people at all... so I've had my fair share of being alone and isolated. I know it's not healthy, it just feels like both options are bad, but in one there is at least some human affection or whatever.

And thank you I wish real life was more like a writing forum. Nicer people and easier to reach out to new people

 

I'd settle for the cashier having the courtesy to thank me for my patronage. Lack of manners or poor training, I guess.

 

I understand where you are coming from. It is hard on either side of the fence.
Though it is highly preferable to not want to be around people that are asshats
to you on a regular basis. Real friend s give eachother shit, but it is not in a
negative way, and all parties know that is all in good spirits.

So with all that out of the way, you will do whats best for you (even if everyone
else disagrees wither your decision). Suppose we are hoping you meet some
more respectful persons, that will treat you better than the lot you have now.

Feel better, and all the best.

 

Leo Getz from the Lethal Weapon films.

In fact the LW films in general - specially from 2 onwards - kind of get on my tits.

This is pretty much how they all play out from 2 onwards:

"Hey, R-R-R-Riiigs! Rigs!" (piercing saxophone). Repeat for 100 minutes.

 

We went to the Golden Corral for dinner tonight (for those outside the US, it's a cheapo buffet restaurant). The cashier had the audacity to say, "So, two for the senior discount, then?" Senior? It hit me like if she had said, "So, the big butt discount for you, then?" She should have been fired, right?

 

Murdered, actually.

 

Pundits and ordinary people who criticize creative works (songs, plays, stories) because they use expressions and images that oh, my gosh! CAN'T BE LITERALLY TRUE!!!! Like the critic I read who rejected songs where the singers say love leaves them breathless, because, good golly, if they were breathless they'd be dead!

Yeah, right. You dolt, what were you doing when your 8th grade English teacher was explaining metaphors and similes? Picking your nose?

The only reason this "shouldn't" annoy me is because people who think like this are just that, dolts.

 

Did you take the discount?

 

People who remember stuff that I should, but don't. I had to look up both references in this sentence from another thread: "One would need a General Products Hull and a Pierson’s Puppeteer to even get started to get there from here.", and I loved those books back in the day.

 

"I'm not a robot".
"Prove it. Click on every image which shows a fuscous thaumatrope."

 

The fact that I said the quote in my signature was from Gandalf for like 5 months before I finally remembered it was actually from Samwise Gamgee

 

No! My husband did though and it was only 60 cents anyway.

 

My car. (end bitching)

 

Things that Annoy me.... (And should annoy everyone else!!!)

Human Incompetence, My Pharmacy is one of the best in the company, we made it to #1, and how do they reward... how the fuck do they reward us, show their gratefulness to my Pharmacy Manager, who took the worst Pharmacy in the company and made it literally number 1 in the company. By Cutting our hours to unreasonable levels. And why, why do they do this.. Incompetence and greed. The big fucks at corporate made some risky purchases putting the company in dire straights, and it's us, the employees who get fucked.