Not at all. Day off today (and tomorrow). 33% of my brain does nothing but think about restaurant things. If I ever had a stroke or head injury, my cognition test would be all food related questions. That's what my marbles do. If I was half as good at writing I'd be an international bestseller twenty times over.
The latest business model has the customer enter the restaurant, hand over his wallet, remove the jacket at their front desk, and [he/she] takes a beating in the yard. Gets a lollipop on the way out as an incentive to come again. That kind of blends the dessert/revenue stream conundrum. People admire the stampede, and not just for cattle. Any opportunity to disguise myself among a herd of bison, and hurl myself over the ravine's lip with the boys, and ultimately keep some chief warm through his winter, that would be great value for money. We don't need ice cream.
Potvin’s Pizzeria I always wanted to go see my buddy Potvin in action, down at his Pepperoni Potential. He told me so much about the thriving, jumping atmospheres and the hearty portions of steaming twelve inchers on his plate. I was salivating on the aeroplane over to Chicago, or Chihuahua, I can never be certain with these foreign place names. Our taxicab pulled up outside in the dust, and in my excitement I busted through those saloon doors. And oh my God there he was in the background with his autographed hat, and the white apron spread round his fine man belly. A true veteran of the galley service. Now behind PV I spied maybe twenty, thirty monkeys rolling dough and tossing tomatoes into liquidisers. It’s all very high technology in America. And before I even had the opportunity to greet my buddy, this lady, she kind of fell over in front of me, all dressed in chiffon and a head piece, maybe a garter around that thigh? She was of course the boss, PV told me about their nights together counting money. She stood up and hiccupped. ‘Hey y’all,’ she said. ‘How do you do,’ I replied. ‘Fuck,’ she said, ‘fucking tourists,’ she said a faraway look in her eye. But then she eyeballed me specifically, and regarded my wife and family. ‘Table for four and a half?’ she said. I only nodded because I don’t speak American. Then I heard the voice of Potvin, my old friend, I was moments from shaking his hand. ‘Focking English,’ he said, Focking fock the hell to Buckingham Palace.’ Those monkeys were in a frenzy, beating on their chests. One even was on his knees polishing Potvin’s baton for the principle service.
I know I'm the relative newbie here, but since you guys are getting all lovey dovey, I love all of you, too. You're all hilarious and damn fine people. ETA: I may take my love for @matwoolf back if he ever changes his avatar, though.
This morning as I was making coffee I realized what the feeling of an unsatisfied palate at the end of the meal is. It's kind of crude, but describes it perfectly: culinary blue balls. The cure: frozen chocolate mousse. I'm not ordering the molten chocolate cake, the bread pudding, or the tapioca. The first two have been done to death for over 20 years now and have reached the point where they're often done badly. Tapioca's not getting any love from me after a good meal. After a good meal I want something chocolate with a silky texture, or something out of the ordinary with a silky or fluffy texture. ETA: Joan's On Third's Chocolate Roulade is a cure that's actually obtainable. It's a classic flourless chocolate cake baked in a sheet pan then filled and rolled jelly-roll style with with slightly sweetened whipped cream, then the whole thing is dusted with cocoa. At Easter, Joan's does a lemon flourless cake version.
Chilli chicken escalopes with roasted veg - i wish i could say it was my work but its courtesy of M&S (thats a posh supermarket for the americans among us)
Cooking? Well, I've got a kilo and a half of tri-tip salting away in the fridge for the second round of biltong, to go in the smoker/dryer tomorrow morning. Traditional spice is coriander, which is why I'm using szechuan peppers this time. We'll see.
There was a guest on the morning show Mr. Kelly directs that was talking about superfoods, so low and behold he came home with a bag full of gorgeous beets with the greens still on. I think I'm going to do a stacked "tartare" of diced roasted beets and carrots, sauteed beet greens and a pork loin that's been sitting in my freezer for a while.
I dunno about superfoods, but that sounds great. Drunken side note, I think it's "lo and behold", but I'm still going to bug you for a more specific recipe when I sober up.
I'm trying to cut back on carbs, so I'm thinking taco salad without a shell/tortillas. Maybe some fried cheese chips for texture?
I made 20 charcuteries and picked on all the meats, cheeses, cornichons, and stout figs... not feeling so hot. ETA: ugh, no beets... poached, peeled, and sliced like 20 lbs of them this morning.
Oh man, too much of that combo sounds brutal. A club soda with lemon from the bar should fix you up. Whatcha makin' with the beets, Homes? I love beets. It was a happy day when my supermarket in L.A. started carrying them already peeled and roasted. I'm paying for the convenience, but since it's just me, it's worth it because I wouldn't bother making them otherwise. Not cooking tonight. I had a Gyro with homemade tzaziki when I was out earlier today, then we stopped at a bakery that had old school chocolate mousse...real rum and all. Might've had a tad too much rum in it, but it was delicious. I could feel a little bit of a burn from the Bacardi.
Female choice tonight - prawns & avocado. I took charge for round two - fish fingers and some ‘chowder’ in plastic dolphin- killing toy container, feeling q guilty about the plastic plus the three glass bottles for turtles, hic
I am sure someone will do this at some point. But it is still true: Putting frosting on a bottle of Rum, does not a Rum Cake make.
Szechuan biltong (Google says I'm the first person to put those words together intentionally, yay!) has been pickled and brined and is in the smoker/dryer as we speak. Traditionally it gets hung in the breeze for up to a week, but last time I did it at 100F for 23 hours. I've seen some recipes saying that you can do it in a food dehydrator at 130, or your oven at 170, and have it done in a few hours. Since I've never had the real thing, I've got nothing to compare my efforts to, so I'm giving the 170 plan a shot today. The most important thing is to change multiple variables every single time so that if you accidentally get something right, you'll have at least three more runs to try and figure out what that was.
I actually made some Tacos today. They came out fantastically terrible, so for dinner I went to visit my mother and just ate some Bacalao Guisado (Cod stew). I'm a horrible person, I know, but eating my tacos would've have killed me.....okay that's dramatic, but they were terrible. The cod stew on the other hand was totally worth it.
