gay MC and sex scenes

My point was that I, a 1 or 2 on the Kinsey scale, would not show up as bisexual on an survey of the LBGTQ community. But under the right circumstances, I might very well have sex with someone of the same sex as me. So you saying that bisexuals "are within an extreme minority margin in the LGB community" doesn't mean that much, because I think there are lots of people who wouldn't identify as bisexuals but who still might, under certain circumstances, have sex with someone of the same sex as them.

Behaviour may suggest labels, but labels don't determine behaviour. Just because I'm not labelled as bisexual it doesn't mean I must always, under all circumstances, be completely straight.

You seem to be thinking of a three-point scale of attraction? People are either straight, bi, or gay, and their behaviour will always conform to their label. But I know lots of gay people who've had sex with people of the other sex, lots of straight people who would consider gay sex in certain circumstances, etc. The labels are an oversimplification, but if you want to use them, I think it's probably best to think of the majority of humanity as potentially bi, given the right circumstances, even if their thoughts and behaviour are straight as a rule.

 

If a gay person has had sex with the opposite gender then that would make them bisexual. Since there are only two genders, it's only possible to be attracted to either a male, a female or both. If you are attracted to both, it doesn't matter when or how you found this out; you were born bisexual. Straight people who would consider gay sex in certain circumstances are still bisexual, how does that make them straight when they're attracted to the same gender as well? It's clear that they are bisexual.

And we have to accept that a lot of people who are straight or gay will continue to do so because you can't just "convert" them, it isn't like a religion or an ideology, it's a sexuality that you are born with.

 

Although I identify as straight, I've recently realized that I find a lot of genderfluid/genderqueer people attractive. I'm not sure where in the hell that puts me on the Kinsey scale, but it's definitely A THING with me.

 

Is there any particular reason why you're not planning on querying agents in America, the UK, and other English-speaking countries? If you can publish in English, I shall assume your English is native standard, so why restrict yourself to the Dutch market? (since your profile says you're from the Netherlands)

I've no idea what a POD is.

 

Print On Demand. It's used by both self-published authors and smaller publishing houses who don't have the capital to print hundreds or thousands of books in the hopes that they'll sell.

 

POD - Print on Demand.

 

If every single person who might possibly be attracted to the gender that they're not most often attracted to is bisexual, then I suspect that a very large portion of the population is bisexual.

 

That's a huge generalization, that doesn't apply to everybody. Most people who aren't born bisexual find it repulsive to even consider having sex with anything but the gender they're attracted to, much less entertain the thought of a relationship with them. I'm not sure why it's so difficult to just accept the word of straight and gay people that they simply just aren't attracted to everything, just the gender they're attracted to.

Why does everybody have to be on a spectrum? Why must the idea that all straight men secretly like other men be the only answer? If a man says he's straight and does not find men sexually attractive, then why can't it be left at that?

 

It's a huge generalization to suggest that your huge generalization might not be totally accurate? Okey. Also, you're putting words in my mouth that I never said. In fact, I'm not sure if anyone said that "all straight men secretly like other men". Since you seem to be arguing with a strawman, it's best that I leave the two of you in peace.

 

How else am I supposed to interpret what you're saying? It's very vague. All I can take from it is that since you believe everybody is on a spectrum, you're implicating that it's possible for the majority to be bisexual without knowing it. I'm saying that it's a huge generalization because we don't even know if the spectrum actually works and to say that everybody on it could happen to become attracted to a gender that they weren't attracted to before is a generalization.

If everybody is on the spectrum then are you saying that people can "move" on that spectrum at any time? So to speak, switch their sexual orientation?

Which is why I also asked why straight and gay people can't just be that, straight and gay?

 

I was afraid I was going to do this, my apologies, it started with me.

 

Cause not everybody is that black and white, in terms of their sexuality.
People have things called brains, and they happen to be able to change overtime
based upon thought patterns.

That and bi-sexualism has been around since people have, so unless it was a new
phenomena, it is just as normal as people who lean one way or another.

Now with the relaxed state of terms given the 'progressives' mindless way of inventing
shit out thin air, a man can dress in drag, have a girlfriend, and call himeslf a lesbian.
Mind you he also claims to be Transitioning, but is not taking hormones or even considering
getting reassignment surgery. I call that a man that is straight and full of horse pucky.
Fine by me if you want to dress like the opposite sex, and be with them, but you are still
straight regardless, unless you actually transition into the gender you wish to identify as.

All these made up sexual identities is a load. You only have 3 options. Straight, gay/les, and bi.
Those are the only logical and rational choices, before you start making shit up to sound like a
special snowflake.

(Sorry if this offends anyone, but that is reality)

And I have no problem with anyone and their sexual preference, as long as it makes some kind
of coherent sense.

 

I'm still looking into my options, but according to several Dutch research and stories I've heard from people who has tried to walk that road, it's very difficult for a foreigner to get an american agent without having to spend a considerable amount of money. Pretty much the only reason they would consider, is once a book is already a bestseller in the country of origin. Only then they might be interested.
Having said that, I do intend to try and sell my book internationally. There are several (online) stores here that sell globally for instance. Another option I'm looking into is Amazon's selfpublishing options and Lulu's(?).

 

A part of human sexuality is who and what you're attracted to, so this statement is self contradictory.

 

Sexual attraction involves things like fetishes, pedophilia and bestiality. It is possible to be attracted to those things and still have a sexual orientation to a certain gender. That's the distinction I am making here.

 

The funny thing about this whole discussion about what sexuality is or should be and blabla, is that it only enhances the point I'm trying to achieve with my theme; Humans think exactly like the discussion above: We feel the need to label things, as if labels gives us the context we so desperatly seem to need in order to have peace of mind. And as soon as anyone messes with it, discussion starts and emotions fly. (which isn't always a wrong thing, mind me.)

That's where 'my' vampires are different. They don't need those labels, those frameworks. You see the same thing in really old people, they seem to be able to let those 'little' things go. I can only imagine how one would feel if you're 200, 300 years old or older even. When you've seen entire societies rise and fall, wars break out over 'little' things. *dreams off in her own world*

 

I'm basing a lot of what I say on established science and personal experiences. I don't think age will affect your sexual orientation but sexual attraction? Certainly, you could end up being sexually attracted to hula hoops by the time you reach the age of 300. But your sexual orientation remains the same throughout and there are no studies proving that old people change sexual orientations.

 

Fetishes are a philia, and do not determine who you are attracted to.



The other two are just sick and wrong.

 

Yes, that's what I'm saying. There is a huge difference between sexual orientation and sexual attraction, pedophiles are sexually attracted to children but that is not their sexual orientation.

 

Well, I just found this study about transgender people changing sexual orientation. So there's that. And there's also this book here. So, again, there's that.

 

At the risk of offending people, transgender people are quite frankly people suffering from Gender Dysphoria. They have not changed sexual orientations, they were sexually attracted to the same gender from the beginning. As proven that some heterosexual people with Gender Dysphoria claim to be "lesbians" or "gays".

 

How do you distinguish between someone "claiming" to be gay and someone who actually is gay?

And... do you have any citations to support ANY of the statements you're making with such authority on this thread?

 

You really didn't read that study at all, did you.

 

Where would be the fun in that?

 

Yes well most people don't recognize that one as a fetish but more of a severe mental disorder.

Secondly normal fetishes involve situations or professions that arouse them. Orientation has nothing
to do with them, so doesn't make sense in bringing them up in the first place. Further more there have
been people that have specifically sought out the same sex to engage in such activities to keep the sexual
element out of it. Fetishes are not exclusively attached to ones libido. Arousal comes in more ways than
strictly being sexual in the first place. People who are adrenaline junkies are aroused by the thrill and
fear that they could potentially die, and get a rush from cheating death. So bringing up fetishes has no
bearing on ones orientation, nor does it shape it. Some people have them, develop them over time,
or don't have any at all.
Still has nothing to do with anyone's sexual orientation.