No, I'm straight. That being said I'm also a Furry and I've been desperately lusting after Lola Bunny since 1996 sooo...I'm straight but I'm weird. I make no apologies. She's hot, sue me.
Well, when I was a kid Lola didn't exist, but I did used to have a bit of a crush on this: Spoiler I'd like to say I outgrew it, but then I do have this gif on standby.
I'm gay. But I'm not what I consider a "flaming queen" - I look, dress, and act pretty damn manly. I don't like Judy Garland or Barbra Streisand. Or Liza Minelli or disco or the "club scene." I can't dance, and probably wouldn't if I could. I'm a man who likes to hang out with men (I don't mean "hang out" that way, before all the jokes come in). I'm just not attracted to women.
You've brought up a topic that has always baffled me a bit. I'm a heterosexual woman, but I can certainly understand why some men are sexually attracted to other men, and some women are sexually attracted to other women. BUT ...how can it happen that a man who is sexually attracted to other men would prefer men who look and act like women—especially 'diva' type women? Women who wear tons of makeup, etc? The 'gay icon' thing. I can see why gay men and women might want to play down artificial gender stereotypes. But to encourage them? I am truly curious. What am I missing?
Different people are different. I know hetero women that prefer effeminate men and men that prefer masculine women. I also know women that prefer other womanly women and manly men that like manly mans. I also know gay men that find women attractive, but would get ill at the thought of copulating with one.
Yes, but that makes sense to me. A man prefering a manly man, etc. That's the point, isn't it? A gay man is attracted to MEN—or a particular man. (Brokeback Mountain, etc.) So ...why would a gay man be attracted to men who dress and act like the most unrealistic of women? It seems strange to me, on some level. Attraction to a stereotype you would actually hate to copulate with in real life? There is definitely something I'm missing. And yes, I know that some women are attracted to women who act and dress and project themselves as manly. It's a similar thing?
It's the 10th Wonder of the World, right after gamers asking "Why am I lagging?" and "How did that miss?"
Are you saying effeminate men aren't men? Generally the argument goes the other way, in that no matter how indistinguishable someone is from a genetic woman, if they were born with a penis, they'll always be a man.
No. Don't put words in my mouth. Of course they are men, if they say they are. I'm just wondering why this 'diva' thing? Effeminate men were not born with makeup and high heels and fakey glamour, any more than women are. It's one of those things that made me totally uncomfortable watching "Tootsie," the movie. Is that what men think women are like? It's all about teetering around on high heels and wearing makeup and exaggerating a rather unpleasant and uncomfortable stereotype? (Of course the character in that movie was not gay, so it doesn't totally apply.) I was totally comfortable with Brokeback Mountain. But not Tootsie. I feel insulted, as a woman, if men think women have to wear makeup and high heels to be attractive and get noticed and be 'female.' It's more a statement on female stereotypes than it is on gender differences. Is that what men think is 'effeminate?' Yikes. That's a slightly different issue from the one I brought up on this thread, though. My core question is this: Why would you (the generic you) have the desire to imitate a gender you're not, in order to attract a person who doesn't actually like the gender you're pretending to be? Whatever form that takes?
I wouldn't say I'm attracted to a masculine woman, but I am attracted to women who aren't push-overs. Sometimes a woman who's dominant tends to be described as masculine. And this is why my relationship status is set to "Confused". Also, the women I like are the ones teetering around on high-heels and wearing make-up. But then I feel deceived and utterly disappointed. This poll should've included an "Alone" option. Yes officer, I've been drinking.
In my experience, the majority of gay men don't act this way, at least not on a regular basis. I'm not saying there aren't guys like this, because there are, but I think they seem much more prevalent because if a guy doesn't act gay, we assume they're straight, so when we see the small percentage of flamboyant divas, that colours our perception. But I have noticed when out and about, that if I'm trying to pick a guy up at a bar, chance of success is way greater if when I'm talking I do a couple of the stereotypical gay gestures, specifically the 'hand flop' thing. So I think stereotypical gay behaviour could also be a type of shibboleth, telling other men that yes, you are a part of that club, and yes you'd be willing to get down.
If I were anymore gay I'd be a flaming rainbow unicorn, lol. Seriously though, I'm about 90-95% gay in that I'm definitely so, but I know that sexuality is a spectrum and there is that part of you that is more curious and would do it. I don't imagine I'll ever actually date a woman though. Boobs are gross.
Yeah, I can't do the voice without it sounding like I'm making fun of someone. I like boobs. I've honestly considered getting a set of my own just to cut out the middle (wo)man, but then I would have to get my suits re-tailored...
If you ever don't want any, let me know. I'm a fan. On a side note, I've had a lot of people tell me that before they got to know me, they wondered if I was gay. This is what I get for not being your stereotypical "fuckboy" or "Alpha bro".
Yeah, my question was to the gay men who DO like the diva thing. Why? I am truly curious. I have a very good gay male friend (from my childhood, who has stayed in touch all these years) who talks about 'gaydar.' He says gaydar picks up subliminal cues from another person that lets him know they are also gay. This has nothing to do with diva behaviour or dress, which he's not attracted to. He is married, by the way, to a guy he's been with for well over 40 years. I've been thinking about the many men and women I've known in my life who are gay. Especially the ones who didn't 'come out' till after I knew them. I have to say that in ALL cases, without any exceptions, I wasn't surprised when they came out. In other words, there must be some kinds of subliminal cues floating about that everybody can pick up on—not just other gay people.
I used to say I was 'non-discriminatory,' but the reality is I'm hugely discriminatory, but more about things like reading habits, diction, and hobbies rather than like race or gender.
I think the only thing you're missing there is that there is no point. People are just physically or emotionally attracted to various things. A person doesn't declare their sexuality in order to be attracted to one type or another. Almost the exact opposite is true (which I'm sure you know. I'm not calling you out here.) Think of it this way, being effeminate, even to the point of fitting negative stereotypes, is still very different from being a woman. Most of us wouldn't confuse one with the other, and there are people who are attracted to each. They just are.
