I'm going to give you a short writing prompt. Continue it in any way you want. Well, except sexually explicit items. Okay, try to keep it so that minors, under the age of eighteen, can still read it. Catherine screamed. It was shrill and high pitched. She jumped up from the over sized chair she was sitting in and flailed her arms into the air in excitement. “I got it! I got it! I got the job!” She then pranced around the living room shaking her hands in front of her, something Dan called “Jazz hands.” At the first octave Kurt slapped his hands across his ears and cringed. “Okay! You got it. Shut up already!” He shouted at Catherine annoyed at the very sound of her voice. Kurt had grown to dislike his big sister over the last few months. Maybe, it was his own spur of preteen hormones? Or perhaps it was the way that she seemed to get everything she wanted while Kurt had to struggle to even get a simple pizza topping he wanted? Maybe, it was the way his new step mother adored her and left him sulking in his room every weekend? “That's okay, let her have her stupid job and her stupid pineapple pizza. Let Blair get her new stuff all the time and go places with her. I got something better.” Kurt thought to himself. Your turn! Go for it! I hope I helped.
He closed the door of his bedroom and went back to his desk, hearing muffled howls of her sister from downstairs. "That's better," he thought as he sat on the chair, "It's gonna be a looong weekend". He look eagerly at the white metal box on his desk. It was small, he even could put his shoes in it. But of course he won't. He reach out and caressed the top surface with his fingers. Then, slowly, he spin it ninety degrees to look at the logo printed on the long side. His heart hammered in his chest. It was just a green hexagon with a white K letter inside. The KinHex Corporation logo. That's where daddy worked. The box was his birthday present. He knew what was inside even though he hasn't opened it yet. Inside was he wanted the most. He smiled. "It's gonna be a looong weekend".
He smiled. "It's gonna be a looong weekend". (Con't) He said aloud this time. He pattered his fingers over the metallic green logo, creating the effect of a horses gallop; his heart couldn't quite match the rhythmic pace, but it was pretty close to doing so. Kurt set the container back on its back, placing his thumb nails under the lid.Slowly applying pressure, the lids seal broke. "With great power, comes great responsibility Kurt....." his father had said before placing the container in his hand. Kurt stared down at the bright radiating light, his face aglow with a green hue.
"Your father told me a lot about you Kurt" the banana said with a sly grin. "And you, Lord Ban'an...Na" Kurt said as he knelt. Kurt had awaited this day for a long time, he didn't know if he was ready, but the success of his sister has forced his hand. It was now or never. He would become the fruit his father always wanted him to be. "Take a bite of thee, Kurt...and let the radioactive sugar juice of my body, transform you...into a fruit" Kurt stood, wrapped his hands around the banana, and bit into its glowing green skin.
A hideous stench filled the room. Kurt wondered if he'd pooed the bed again, it had been a pretty freaky nightmare. Then suddenly Lord Ban'an..Na jumped up. 'Ha! Fooled you kid! Becha thought it was only a dream? Well, guess what, it wasn't, it's a glorious reality! Now roll over here, and discover what awaits you as Fruit Overlord of the Universe!' Kurt squelched slightly as he checked out his new body. That was where the foul stink was coming from. He'd been transformed into a durian, the smelliest fruit in the world. Kurt fondly reflected on the first time he'd eaten a durian, he'd been with his girlfriend Astrid on a beach in Thailand. A brief but sweet holiday romance for a boy of twelve, but weren't they always at that age?
He wondered where Astrid was now, what she would think of his new faculties. In fact, he wondered himself what new faculties this form provided him. "O-overlord? Does that mean I'm your master now?" he asked, prodding at the spiky tendrils that covered his body with his root hands. "Don't get ahead of yourself kid, nobody bosses Lord Ban'an..NA around. But,technically... by the laws of fruit and men...." Ban'an Na coughed, obscuring the rest of his speech. "What was that?" Kurt asked. "Alright! Jeez, fine! You wanna hear me say it? You wanna bring me down? Yes, you're now my master, you happy!? Unbelievable, some upstart kid whose been a fruit for less then a minute dares claim authority over ME, LORD BAN'AN" it paused, its radioactive eyes set in a terrified stare. "Na? What is it?" "Don't...move....kid..." it said calmly, pointing with the tip of his head at a nail sharply glistening only a short roll away from Kurt. "What's the big deal, I'm the fruit overlord of the universe, it's just a nail" "You stupid fruit...you've got enough stench power locked inside that spiky shell of yours to bring this whole thing down around our heads..." A sudden memory came crashing back to him, he remembered where Astrid was now; buried ten feet in the dirt, and it was the putrid stench of the durian that had put her there. "No...it can't be...I've become death, destroyer of worlds?"
Awoken in the night by a distressingly familiar aroma, God climbed out of his bed in the clouds to go and spy on creation with his binoculars. 'What the..?' said God. But before he could finish his sentence, he found himself smothered in foul smelling, but oddly delicious, dripping gobs of durian. God didn't usually mind bathing in fruit puree, but durian was a different matter. Literally. Durian was the fruit of death. The fruit of destruction. The fruit of evil. Anti-matter fruit! The demise of Kurt, Daifu Durian, Overlord of All Fruit, destroyer of worlds - or simply 'the kid' as he'd been affectionately known by those who'd loved him (not including his annoying older sister Catherine) - was mourned for over 10'000 years in the fruit universe. Kurt's life had been a short but brilliant one. His swimming certificate was carefully retrieved from the ashes and interred in a temple dedicated to his memory. Millions visited the sacred site, cherries, physalis, all manner of berries, apple and citrus, united in their grieving. It was a wonder to see. Lord Ba'nan..Na preserved what remained of his master in brandy. The kid had had so much potential. If it hadn't been for that damned fateful nail! Who.. WHO.. had put it there, he raged, weeping copious green tears into his cocktail. Hmm.. who indeed?
"Where am I, who's talking? Did someone just faint?" Kurt said, except the words didn't come from his mouth. He couldn't feel his mouth, or his body, or anything at all. "I'm dead aren't I?" the thought rang out in his consciousness with no reply. "It's all that blasted nails fault...who...who could have left it there?" Kurts new found overlord powers kicked in, and the black nothingness of sensory absence began to erupt with color , sound, and feel. Before he knew it, he was back in his bedroom staring at the green logo, his thumb nails at the ready to pry the lid off of its seal. "Did I just...travel back in time?" he said, feeling his lips and tongue move in his mouth once more. He looked to the floor where the nail had been and saw nothing. It could only have come from one other person...and that person was a damn radioactive fruit. "Ba'nan....NAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Lord Ban'an...Na, acting overlord of the Fruit Universe (at least until the young prince Kurt came into his fruit powers), sat cooly cogitating at his cocktail cabinet. He was a sly banana, and the smile on his green face revealed more than simple unaffected joy at the anticipated awakening of the new overlord. Bathed in a soothing radioactive light, the Overlord Chamber was tastefully decorated in flashing neon signs, and multicoloured paper butterflies, which fluttered bouncily in the breeze of a ceiling fan. The Overlord Chamber was the ideal place to perfect Lord Na's plan. Because it had a secret door. A door which Na was watching closely through narrowed eyes and a cruel, self-satisfied smile. Na had his sharply sparkling nail to the ready, he would jump through that door before anyone else was even aware that the kid had opened the lock on the other side. Then he would seize his chance to deploy the weapon once the kid fell into his transformational sleep. Kurt would awaken groggy, confused, unused to his new form, and unaware of just how much power it possessed. He would be defenceless, like a ripe cherry to be plucked and eaten.. The nail in Na's hand sparkled like a diamond in the neon lights. The nail was contraband in the fruit universe and had taken many moons of negotiations on the dark fruit web to procure. But finally he had it in his grasp. An evil laugh erupted from his evil face... 'Hahahahahah I shall be overlord forever!!!' He imagined how he would pretend to mourn with the others, stifling his evil laughter under sobs of sorrow and fits of rage, he would pretend to care. He would even pretend to be nice to the kid, the little upstart! No-one would ever suspect that he had caused the destruction of the human world, killed the kid, and seized the throne all in one fell swoop. Then he would feast on the kid's remaining flesh, like the fruit cannibals of old, filling himself with The Power!! Na checked his digital watch, it was nearly time. The kid should be cracking open the box any moment now... Ten minutes later Na was drumming his fingernails on the countertop in annoyance. What the hell was going on? Was the kid ever going to open that cursed box? Twenty minutes later, the effects of Na's brandy cocktail combined with the soporific bouncing of the butterflies, left him slumped and snoring gently over the counter, green drool oozing from his slack mouth.. Kurt peered in carefully through a crack in the door. He felt certain his cunning disguise would fool the sly banana. He'd found the pineapple costume in his sister's Halloween box and in the kitchen he'd found the perfect weapon to defeat his hated nemesis. The Kid's face was steely and determined, as in his right hand he brandished a yellow plastic banana slicer. Just one question troubled Kurt, why had Na warned him at the last minute? Had the sly banana had a change of heart, was it possible that there was some good still in him? Kurt reached out with his feelings.. There was good in Na, he was sure of it.
There was Vitamin B6, Vitamin C, of course folate, and Kurt was going to extract all that juicy goodness from Na's body with this here banana slicer. "Ready or not, here I come you...." Kurt popped the lid off and readied the banana slicer, ready to let the coil of plastic blades rend Na into pieces. He stood in shock, his eyes beholding a sight his mind had not expected, a sight which changed everything.
'That's a shock', said Kurt, licking his huge lollipop in ecstasy, 'I hadn't expected to see that. This changes everything!'
And the slicer went on him. First it did a thorough work on his left hand so that Kurt couldn't push the slicer away. And then... ...the slicer was stuck - the pen in Kurt's chest pocket entered the space between slicer cheeks and noiselly arrested their move. "My father was right - a pen can be very useful."
"Ho mwahahahaaa!" screeched the sentient slicer, withdrawing from that accursed pen. It floated jellyfishily between Kurt and the slumbering Ban'an. "What... what are you?" Kurt asked, his voice as perplexed as his face, his left hand a bloody mess. The slicer did a loop de loop, shouting: "I am the harbinger of plastic death, the bringer of ends to those who wish to end fruit, any and all. Aye, when I was a wee lad I was a bigot, cutting canteloupes, rending rasberries and jabbing jackfruit! But I have seen the light, for is not violence against fruit an inherent evil brought about by various socio-economical disparities that exist only because the bourgeois wish to uphold archaic notions of singular tribalistic inter-organic elitism? Additionaly-" BANG! The peeler spoke no more. It had evaporated, all thanks to the laser musket held by Gorp Dorington, dimensional tourist. The bang had awoken the Fruit Lord. Kurt, his mind a jamble of activistic buzzwords, simply stood there. Mouth hanging open. Hand dripping life jelly. "Hey yo, bordilignoop boyo! Is this the Randy Roadstripe bar? Or am I in the wrong galaxy!? He heh he... ah zit. Wrong galaxy." Gorp frowned. His four eyes blinked. He turned his head. He noticed Ban'an. He frowned some more. Scratched his stomach.
