Tags:
  1. badatgramer

    badatgramer New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    2

    Help with colon useage

    Discussion in 'Word Mechanics' started by badatgramer, Jun 26, 2019.

    Am I using this colon correctly?

    "Additionally, I have a persevering mindset because I do not give up in my long term goals: For instance, becoming an Eagle Scout."

    Thanks for the help!
     
  2. Homer Potvin

    Homer Potvin A tombstone hand and a graveyard mind Staff Supporter Contributor

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2017
    Messages:
    12,136
    Likes Received:
    19,758
    Location:
    Rhode Island
    Hmmm... looks a little funny, but I think you can get away with it. "For" would be lowercase after the colon, though. And you should be using "on" instead of "in" before "long term goals."

    I'd probably reword it to eliminate the "for instance," which I think is causing the funny looking (but probably necessary?) colon in the first place. Something like: (now that's a good colon right there!)


    "Additionally, I have a persevering mindset because I do not give up on my long term goals. Like becoming an Eagle Scout."

    ETA: paging @Seven Crowns
     
    Last edited: Jun 26, 2019
  3. ChickenFreak

    ChickenFreak Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2010
    Messages:
    15,262
    Likes Received:
    13,084
    I wouldn't use a colon here--I'd use a hyphen. Also, it's "on", not "in"

    Additionally, I have a persevering mindset because I do not give up on my long term goals--for instance, becoming an Eagle Scout.

    A colon would be OK if you lost the "for instance" and made it listlike:

    Additionally, I have a persevering mindset because I do not give up in my long term goals: becoming an Eagle Scout, maintaining a straight B+ average, and breeding a superior dryfarm tomato.

    I don't like the "because". "Because" calls for a reason:

    I cook because I'm hungry.

    But you instead are using it to present evidence:

    I cook because I make scrambled eggs.

    That feels off. I'd split the sentence:

    I cook. I make scrambled eggs.

    So I'd split your sentence:

    Additionally, I have a persevering mindset. I do not give up on my long term goals--for instance, becoming an Eagle Scout.
     
  4. badatgramer

    badatgramer New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    2
    @ChickenFreak and @Homer Potvin thank you so much for the help!
     
    Homer Potvin likes this.
  5. Some Guy

    Some Guy Manguage Langler Supporter Contributor

    Joined:
    May 2, 2018
    Messages:
    6,738
    Likes Received:
    10,227
    Location:
    The kingdom of scrambled portmanteaus
    I'm too embarrassed to show you how I use my colon.
     
  6. badatgramer

    badatgramer New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    2
    I feel like you've been waiting for an opportunity to use that for a long time. @Some Guy
     
    Homer Potvin likes this.
  7. Some Guy

    Some Guy Manguage Langler Supporter Contributor

    Joined:
    May 2, 2018
    Messages:
    6,738
    Likes Received:
    10,227
    Location:
    The kingdom of scrambled portmanteaus
    Me? No, just a whim. But I'm sure the alien in my brain has been waiting eons. :D
     
  8. Shenanigator

    Shenanigator Has the Vocabulary of a Well-Educated Sailor. Contributor

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2017
    Messages:
    4,886
    Likes Received:
    8,763
    I'm deferring to Seven Crowns for the rules. But, this piece of colon advice from an old newspaper editor has helped me tremendously:

    Think of a colon as setting the stage for presenting a fantastic piece of information, and use it accordingly. It's the P.T. Barnum of punctuation.
     
  9. JLT

    JLT Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Mar 6, 2016
    Messages:
    1,855
    Likes Received:
    2,233
    I use colons in a sentence only for phrases in a list.

    "At the end of his run, he was thinking only of three things: a warm bed, a cold drink, and a massage."
     
  10. Thundair

    Thundair Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2017
    Messages:
    1,345
    Likes Received:
    1,191
    Location:
    San Diego
    I've read a lot of technical stuff, white pages and so on, and a lot of times I would see it as..."Additionally, I have a persevering mindset because I do not give up on my long-term goals, i.e., becoming an Eagle Scout."
    I changed 'in' to 'on' and compounded 'long-term' and deleted because....
     
  11. Lolly Inkstain

    Lolly Inkstain Member

    Joined:
    Jun 26, 2019
    Messages:
    72
    Likes Received:
    151
    Location:
    South East UK
    I'm so glad it wasn't just me who read the thread title and came up with this train of thought
     
    Some Guy likes this.

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice