?

Would you watch a movie like this?

  1. Yes

    2 vote(s)
    40.0%
  2. No

    3 vote(s)
    60.0%
  1. Kirill

    Kirill New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    1

    Longline for a nonexistent fantasy movie in Slavic setting

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by Kirill, Aug 30, 2019.

    Hello, everyone! Sorry to bother you. I want to conduct a little movie poll) How do you like this longline for nonexistent movie?)


    Name:

    Where the fairy-tale ends

    Longline:

    The fictional Slavic country lives side by side with ancient mythical creatures such as mermaids, сynocephalys (werewolfs), domovoys (ghosts), and others, driven into the ghetto. When a group of such creatures raids a warehouse with forbidden magical things, a violent detective from the crimes of mythical creatures department and his companion, a staff сynocephaly, have to undertake an investigation.


    Thank you for participation! Have a good day!
     
  2. Kalisto

    Kalisto Senior Member

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2015
    Messages:
    975
    Likes Received:
    995
    Ghetto would not be a term used in ye olden days.
     
  3. Cdn Writer

    Cdn Writer Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2019
    Messages:
    732
    Likes Received:
    625
    Location:
    Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, North America
    Currently Reading::
    TRYING (!!!) to read Eric Flint's "Ring of Fire" series.......it's soooo many books!!!!!
    Really? I thought the Jewish people's specifically requested a section of the city from the local government, where they would manage everything and this was titled a "ghetto"? Back then, it was not a negative thing as in a " poor" community. It was just an insular community of peoples with its own culture, tradition, and laws.

    Am I wrong?
     
  4. Kalisto

    Kalisto Senior Member

    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2015
    Messages:
    975
    Likes Received:
    995
    No, you just spouted something completely irrelevant, that's all. To be fair, I may not have made my point very well. And that was because I did not ask the right question. What time period are you imaging in your head? If you're imagining the era of the Vikings (which I thought for some reason) then you wouldn't put that term in there. If you're imagining Victoria times and beyond, then yes, it would be appropriate.
     
  5. GrJs

    GrJs Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2018
    Messages:
    185
    Likes Received:
    125
    The thing you're writing is called a Logline, only one n. It's long. Generally a logline isn't over 30 words and it is the plot condensed into the most concise and accurate wording.

    So for yours a better one would be:

    When a group of mystical creatures raid a warehouse full of forbidden magical item, a violent detective must investigate before (insert your antagonists goal here)

    Or

    Violent detective (insert name) must race against time to recover stolen magical artefacts after they're stolen from a government lockbox.

    For comparison:
    The fictional Slavic country lives side by side with ancient mythical creatures such as mermaids, сynocephalys (werewolfs), domovoys (ghosts), and others, driven into the ghetto. When a group of such creatures raids a warehouse with forbidden magical things, a violent detective from the crimes of mythical creatures department and his companion, a staff сynocephaly, have to undertake an investigation.

    What you need in your logline is your protagonist, your protagonists goal, the conflict, your antagonist. The antagonist isn't strictly necessary as you can see from the example above but if your story is focused on a protagonist/antagonist fight rather than another goal, as yours is, then you need to have them in there.

    You don't need back story, you don't need world building. It's all about the characters, main goal and main conflict.


    Forgot to answer your question though :p. Totally would see a movie with this premise.
     
    Kirill and Seven Crowns like this.
  6. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2016
    Messages:
    22,566
    Likes Received:
    25,882
    Location:
    East devon/somerset border
    The term originates from the Jewish Cannaregio Ghetto in Venice instituted in 1516, where Jews were forced to live by the Venetian government, so by and large it has always been a negative thing, not one requested through choice

    on point the the term ghetto was not used prior to 1516, although similar restrictive areas were used further back into history - of course in a fantasy setting any word can be used at any time since we are dealing with a made up world or at the very least alternate timelines/settings

    there is some merit in using terms easily understood by a modern readership, particularly as you are writing in English, not the language actually used at the time.place you are describing
     
  7. matwoolf

    matwoolf Banned Contributor

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2012
    Messages:
    6,631
    Likes Received:
    10,135
    Location:
    Yorkshire
    'Ghetto' can be used in all sorts of ways.

    I would despair somewhat if after writing 'the gated community was a ghetto of snow-eagles and face-lifts...' I then had to tag the expression because my readership had a vocabulary of 500 words.

    The same term could equally be applied to your stone age epic tale with the neanderthals reduced to the caves up the high end of the cliffs...

    ...or low end, maybe..
     
  8. Kirill

    Kirill New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    1
    Thank you for advice and answer! You been really helpful!
     
  9. Kevin Teichman

    Kevin Teichman Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2017
    Messages:
    185
    Likes Received:
    57
    Location:
    Texas
    I would watch it!

    Kirill, do you speak Russian?
     
  10. Kirill

    Kirill New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    1
    Yes, I'm) Did you guess it by my poor English? :D
     
    Kevin Teichman likes this.
  11. Kevin Teichman

    Kevin Teichman Active Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2017
    Messages:
    185
    Likes Received:
    57
    Location:
    Texas
    No, by your name! I know a famous Russian lifter named Kirill Sarychev. I’m also learning Russian.

    Привет! Как дела?
     
  12. Kirill

    Kirill New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    1
    Неплохо! Спасибо, что спросил)
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice