I saw you 'cross the dance floor - I thought of birds and bees. But when I tried to speak to you my tongue unravelled to my knees. I tried to say "I love you", but it came out kind of wrong, girl. It sounded like "nunubididoo", nuh-mur-nuh-murh-ni-nong-nurl Yes, you make me nongy nangy. Why can't I tell you clearly? Be-dobby-durgle, tongue tied whenever you're around Oh, I'm beggin' on my knees, sweet, sweet darling, listen please. Understand me when I say, Gedurble-diggle-doggle-niggle-foggle-nibble-nay Tongue-Tied ~ Howard Goodall / Doug Naylor / Rob Grant
Alas I can't take the credit. Any Red Dwarf fan will know that instantly. I spose I better put a credit in there before the Gestap... I mean the mods come along.
Oops. I feel silly now But thank you for reminding me of Red Dwarf. I'll have to binge it one of these days.
This poem’s pretty awesome for a “terrible poem” I reckon. Are you sure that’s the worst you can do??
Once there was a time, I always spoke in rhyme. I then ate a lime That tasted like slime, And now I can only mime... And write.
I write without fear. I fight without wrear. How can I write without beer? How can I bite without rear? I fear no beer is near, So please bring some here? The demons I fear brought me the beer. I write without fear the tales we tell down here in hell.
June, June, June Oh, how you loom, loom, loom! Just like the moon.. moon, moon Bright in the sky About to come soon.
I fell down a rabbit hole today, f a l l i n g and then I hit the ground, surrounded by rabbits. I have died and gone to Heaven.
Rabbits wiggle noses Rabbits wiggle toeses They like to nibble carrots They like to nibble you. When the rabbits come around Pretend I said something profound.
They speak German in Berlin and Munich, Two places I haven't been, But considering I live in China, I should rather learn Mandarin.
Faithful, true, but therein is the test. Who is faithful, who is true? Find the faithful and you've found the true. But not really, because it's all made up.
Courgettes rhymes wiv baguettes? Like a shiny green truncheon They are really nice to munch on Unless you find a slug in one Damn you Mollusks F****ing ruin everything...
i ride a gas guzzler my gun got a big muzzle every time i see a bunny run i shoot at it with my gun me and daddy think its so fun lookit it run and run into its hole it goes my muzzle i insert my gun's powder i blow until the bunny is inert daddy loves me so
Ode the the disappearance and likely theft of my new pen that I got from the stationery cupboard. She did it, she did it again, She never came back when she borrowed my pen, Plastic and pretty, shiny and new, I liked my new pen, And I guess she did too. (I'll be honest, I kinda like it.)
The cat it stares from up the tree. Its green eyes narrow as it glares at me. Cat, are you going to end my life? Why do you look at me with so much strife?
I caught a cat in my bag and went to the swamp to sell it to a hag she took it and in her pot did she the cat dump along with lizard snot and of mushrooms, a clump seven bats and a dirty rag salt and pepper she added not no, but my eyes she stole and sewed them to a vole into the pot it did go now a blind beggar am I spare a coin for my bowl?
My fingers are like electric zapping hotdogs They stumble upon the TV remote, missing crucial buttons I sigh And the night fades sorrowfully Why did I come here What have I forgotten The children roll out of the closet now, one at a time Holding PEZ dispensers, launching the candies into their dumb little mouths Chalky regrets stewed from my loins and alfredo pasta dreams conquer my route indifference I am not a God No, I am just lord of the flies.
The terrible pain of smelling my old dog's breath I would fly to Jupiter on a jetpack to escape it Would you come with me? Would you bring a sandwich? The time is now and the place is here We must have been sumo wrestlers in a past life As we maneuver around in a circle, trying to cast each other out I declare that there is much foul in the 3rd dimension (and the 4th, and the 5th...) Things fouler than my dog's breath We must do a banishing ritual We must not get vaccinated. Or I might become Autistic again.
Is it just me or does a bee sound like buzzing p or a cracking in my knee maybe a dog yapping in glee or a man zipping up his trousers after a pee no, rather, a convict sawing though bars to get free is that a bee?
I seek PEZ that green like linoleum too. I find the cuss word that meant for blue. hush, I say to my self, this is belladonna on cue.
