The Corporate/Professional Language Translator

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by VicesAndSpices, May 31, 2022.

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  1. Robert Musil

    Robert Musil Comparativist Contributor

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    I was gonna say, a lot of people in this thread have sort of assumed that the flow of learning and adaptation only goes one way. Young people have to learn what older people, who are in charge, want and then give it to them. When in fact there's no reason people of any age can't learn from each other (unless they don't want to learn or change based on what they learn, which is what's really behind a lot of the resistance to this IMHO).

    To try and keep it positive I'll give an example from my own job that happened recently. I'm not as old as I think the people OP was talking about, but I am old enough that I now have colleagues who are ~10 years younger than me. And somehow, I am still the most meme-savvy person in my office.

    (To be fair, online culture did peak with us Millenials...)

    So the other day I made a passing reference to a meme--the "old man yells at cloud" thing from the Simpsons. I did it in a self-deprecating way; I was saying that I was the old man. Nobody else (some of whom were younger than me, some older) got it, so I took a minute to explain what it was and we all had a bit of a laugh. It was really not that big of a deal.

    Now, I'm aware of the power dynamics of this situation--all the other people on this call were either my direct subordinates or in some way my junior in the organization, so perhaps they were secretly thinking "ugh, this guy". But...I also don't really care? Like as long as they're pulling their weight I truly don't care what people think of me (unless it's part of some bigger problem, like they're feeling excluded from the overall team, but more on that below). In my line of work I get bad mouthed all the time, because my job is to make people follow rules, so if I had that thin of a skin I'd never get any real work done.

    I think all of this goes back a bit to the leadership style of whoever it is that's in charge, because they are the ones setting the tone for everyone else. I'm not in charge of much but I tend to be very goal-oriented. As long as the team is accomplishing what it needs to, like I said, I try and not sweat the other stuff. And within my sort of immediate team, I'd say that manifests as not being too fixated on hierarchy, formality, or any of that. I mean you have to be to some extent, because we exist in a larger organization that is fixated on those things, but I try and keep it minimal and only when it's needed.

    Anyway there's a whole thread on leadership styles somewhere around here, so in the hopes of not derailing this thread much more I'll just suggest that as additional reading.
     
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  2. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    Its not so much an age thing except that V&S told us that she's young... new junior people in any organisation have to learn what the senior people want and give them it, regardless of the age of either party. A fifty year old joining a start up run by twenty five year olds will have the same challenges
     
  3. VicesAndSpices

    VicesAndSpices Member Contest Winner 2022

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    To be fair, I'm admittedly part of the resistance, too. I understand I have to learn how to communicate with my older colleagues and clients, but I've convinced myself I don't have to like it while I do. I think it sucks that I have to adapt to them but they're making no effort to adapt to me, and my instinctual response to that is anger. It's one of the other things I'm working on...

    Ask me again in 3 years how I feel about professionalism, and I'd say there's a 50/50 chance I change my mind.
     
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  4. Catriona Grace

    Catriona Grace Mind the thorns Contributor Contest Winner 2022

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    I spent twelve years working in civil litigation. Surviving the same required every skill I'd learned in amateur theater years before. I put on a costume every work day morning and performed on the law firm stage every day. The saving grace of my position was being very good at the job from the beginning, and thus being trusted to work without someone breathing down my neck every second of the day. As new partners came into the firm and determinedly set about leaving their mark on the place, I became increasingly discontent, finally said, see ya, and never looked back. It was an interesting experience, but enough was damn all enough.
     
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  5. Bruce Johnson

    Bruce Johnson Contributor Contributor Contest Winner 2023

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    This sounds like the pilot episode of a new primetime drama.
     
  6. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    A good question is if you feel like that why are you working there ? Go find a young funky start up run by 25 year olds who talk all the latest slang.... admittedly you'll still be the new girl and you'll still have to fit in with how they do things
     
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2022
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  7. Naomasa298

    Naomasa298 HP: 10/190 Status: Confused Contributor

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    Hah, my amateur musical theatre skills have never been called upon in my working life, except once, when I had to sing karaoke as a publicity stunt for my company at a convention. Couldn't quite hit the top notes, but I knew how to fake it without sounding too much like a strangled chicken.
     
  8. VicesAndSpices

    VicesAndSpices Member Contest Winner 2022

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    I graduated in May 2020 and it took me until December 2021 to get a permanent job. Job hunting was exhausting and miserable, and it's not exactly the kind of experience I'm ready to throw myself back into just yet, especially with a resume marred with bailing on my first job only 6 months in. Plus there are financial considerations, location, and a ton of other personal issues keeping me where I am. "Just go somewhere else" is a lot easier said than done. And I'll reiterate an earlier post of mine: I actually like my job. The workplace culture isn't ideal, but I like the work.
     
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  9. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    In which case you need to suck it up and stop kicking against the culture... As Mingo said earlier if professional communication skills came up in your review that's a big problem. If you're not careful your resume will wind up being marred by getting fired.

    Stop expecting the culture to adapt to you - that doesn't happen, for anyone (well unless you're an incredibly rich plutocrat taking over a company and not always then).. You either genuinely adapt to the culture, or you adapt yourself to pretend to adapt to the culture.. resistance as the vogons tell us is futile.

    Being angry that they won't adapt to you is childish - you need the job, the job doesn't need you , because if you won't adapt there are 1000s of applicants who will. This is especially true at the start of your career where you don't offer any special skills or experience which would be costly to replace or difficult to find.

    Also top tip about job hunting if it becomes plain that this is a bad fit - 1) do it before you bail or get pushed, and 2) don't tell the truth about why you're leaving... 'i had a communications problem with my manager' is not something any hiring manager wants to hear... i've never forgotten the otherwise well qualified candidate who wrote "because my manager is a cock" under reason for leaving...we didn't interview him... the acceptable form of words is usually something like "I want to broaden my skills base" or conversely "I want to specialise in xyz"
     
  10. Catriona Grace

    Catriona Grace Mind the thorns Contributor Contest Winner 2022

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    Sometimes it felt like one, too. I liked the work, but let's just say the gig didn't involve type-casting on my part. The day after my last day on the job, I banished anything in the closet that looked like it could be worn at trial. I have not worn a pair of heels or pantyhose since 2010, and never intend to do so again.

    :D No one ever asked me to sing, but one of the partners hired me to teach a private belly dance class for her and half a dozen of her friends.
     
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  11. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    Also i think theres an important point that we may have missed - the issue with "you're being extra just pick one" is not just the phrase "being extra"...it would be no more acceptable to insert an older person phrase such as "don't be so picky, just pick one" (unless you're an extremely senior manager talking to a junior subordinate in a culture which accepts downward rudeness)

    professional communication caries with it a certain expected standard of how it should sound... and it shouldnt sound like something you'd say to a mate, or to child...
     
  12. Naomasa298

    Naomasa298 HP: 10/190 Status: Confused Contributor

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    Well, if you work for a company whose boss likes to do things via Twitter...
     
  13. VicesAndSpices

    VicesAndSpices Member Contest Winner 2022

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    Guys, the horse is dead. You can stop beating me now.
     
  14. big soft moose

    big soft moose An Admoostrator Admin Staff Supporter Contributor Community Volunteer

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    You know selectively quoting people to misrepresent them as picking on you rather than giving you valuable and well thought out advice isn't too cool either... but you're right about one thing, this horse is dead

    :closed:
     
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