I'm in the process of planning my second book which is a sequel to the one I'm working on now. And for the second book, I want to use the first person perspective of writing but I also want to use third-person/"narrator" perspective and I'm not sure if I'm "allowed" to if I get it published. If you can help me, thank you!!
Why? What do you hope to accomplish with this mix of narrative voices? First person is used because of its retrictions to the solitary POV of the main character. Third person is a more flexible perspective that is better in most instances, unlesas your intent is to emphasize a locked point of view by choosing first person. So I ask why. And so would any decent submissions editor.
Very ambitious planning a second while the first is still uncompleted. The mix sounds good, perhaps to set a plot moving that protagonist will be completely unaware of. It sounds possible with careful writing and thought of course.
I can't remember reading a book that pulled this off well. Ever. Switching between first person perspectives is one thing, but switching between first and third... well it's like when that happens in any other context really - movies, games and whatnot - it's kind of jarring. Before you commit, remember that first person details can be given during a third person narrative as long as the link between narrative and character are consistent and not omnipresent. There really shouldn't be a need for you to go that far.
For the sequel it portrays a girl who was a supporting role in the first book and it's telling her story from where the first book left off. I want to write it in POV because I want to express her feelings to the reader because her boyfriend dies. I know you can express it also in third person but I think it brings the readers closer to her if they read it in her perspective. And I want to switch the story to a third person perspective also because I want to describe action scenes that will be happening when she isn't around. Help me out guys! And thanks for the other replies.
Perhaps it would help to read some books that use that mix, then decide if you think you can make it work for you. Oryx and Crake, The Year of the Flood, and Lady Oracle all by Margaret Atwood use a mix, if you can stand to read them (some people really, really dislike her work).
I've read a story with three different narrators (The Blue Girl by some guy whose name escapes me right now) that was done really well - but they were all first-person. Switching from first to third sounds like it would be kinda awkward. It's probably not totally 100% impossible to make it work, but it's probably really really hard. Aburdly hard. Expert Mode. It seems kinda like cheating, though - I mean, writing in first-person, but then showing the audience stuff the narrator doesn't know. As Cogito said, that's kind of the point of first person: we only know what the narrator knows, so it's like we're experiencing the story the same way they are.
You can get as close with third person limited as you can with first person. I'd drop the first person. Besides, doing it in first person is more likely to sound like she's throwing a pity party.
Response to hyperspace!: I've read a couple military books where there are more than one main character and they all tell stories that link to the main plot. And i don't think it's cheating because I've also read a book in my English class where there's a first person and third person view and the third person character tells a story and does things that the first person doesn't know and doing so it excites the readers to find out if she will ever know what the third person did. That's how I kind of wanna portray but I'm not sure yet. Response to Cogito: I want to write it in first person because the first book is written in third person and I want to 'spice up' the format for the readers instead of doing the same thing. And Im not planning to keep switching from POV to Third, only for atleast three scenes which will be in the ending chapters. Try to think of it as a movie where they show a scene of someone doing something that will affect the main character and it switches to a different scene and that main character doesn't know what will happen soon. That's how I vision my scenes in my books. Response to linden: I will go online and look up those books. Thanks!
"Spicing up the format" is a poor reason for selection a narrative voice. Stick to the choice that works best for the story, and concentrate on writing well instead.
Well actually the POV is the best for the sequel because she will be talking about the lost of her boyfriend, meeting a new guy and all other emotional feelings. The sequel steps up with more romance than the first book. That's why I chose POV I'm not here if the message went through, POV is the best for the sequel because she talks about the lost of her boyfriend, meeting a new guy and explaining all of her emotions etc.
I do understand what you are trying to do, and I believe it can be done as well if not better using third person. You're certainly not obligated to follow, or even listen to, other opinions. But you did ask.
I'm currently reading the Bartimaeus trilogy (again), by Jonathan Stroud; he goes from one character in 1st person (I said) to other characters in 3rd person (Soandso said). It was very effective for that series, and if it will work the best for yours, go for it. I recommend you check out those books because they are an example of what you aim to do, plus they are just awesome.
(Just as an aside, "... only for at least" is contradictory. "Only" is limiting - "At Least" is de-limiting.) Consider that, if and when your first book sells, part of that success will be in how it is written. Third person. If you change up the format, it can, as already mentioned, be jarring and distracting. Furthermore, it may be so jarring the agent that handled the first book will say, "Why? --- Fix it." If you can deliver on the first book, don't try to 'spice it up' for the second. (If it ain't broke ...?)
I would not say you definitely can’t do it. I am a movie lover. And it seems like movies can do this. Tell a story and have a narrator but also give the first person point of view in places. I say give it a try. Trying something and having it not work out never hurts anything! It could go very bad though. But it could also work out, who knows until you try it.
I had a plan for a scene, I had descriptions of how certain actions were to be performed. But then as I was writing, something happened in-story that diverted the protagonist's and hence the PoV's attention, so I did not get to 'show' how things were done in the other locations. I am trying an 'after action' briefing, but it feels less fun. I know how the things were done, I suspect a reader might be able to guess but I 1. don't think they should have to guess 2. want them to enjoy the action but 3. cannot use it in a present time setting because although the PoV can view multiple encounters at a time, when the PoV itself is engaged in an encounter that encounter recieves full focus. So in short, I hope I am making sense here. How do you explain things after the fact? My PoV already knows what they were supposed to do.
If the most fun for the reader is to see it as it happens, maybe you can rewrite the scene. Like adding another PoV character. It's probably easier to answer if you post an excerpt in the review room, if you have access there.
My fantasy writing is written in first person and present tense. I find you can set up a discussion - ask questions etc. For me finding the way round my POV problems has produced my best story ideas.
Unless it was vital the actions were performed in that order and at that time, could you put them off? I've moved whole days of my character's time around to accommodate awkward moments like that. Say, make the distracting moment happen before the POV character is meant to stumble onto the rails that roll through the events they were meant to observe?
Hey all, I've begun working on a new project and it's made me realize that I have an odd sort of habit: I tend to write each scene from more than one person's POV in 3rd person. I know about 3rd person omniscient, but it's not exactly like that. I tend to have a scene mostly from a particular character's POV and then sort of insert another person's ideas into it. It's hard to explain without giving an excerpt, but it goes something like: "Mark wandered into the room and grabbed a Coke while simultaneously replaying the dialog with Stacy in his head. While he slumped at the table, contemplating every facial expression she had made, every pause, every word, Annie pursed her lips scowled angrily. "'Well you could say hello, Mark!' Mark jumped and eyed his roommate. 'Oh, hey. Didn't see you there.' You never see me there, Annie thought, biting back the urge to say something more nasty" (This isn't actually from any work or anything. Just made it up for this post) Anyway, you see how I sort of flop points of view halfway through? Well, I've been doing this for a long time and never really thought there was anything wrong with it. But recently, a lot of people have been telling me I should limit all scenes to only 1 point of view. What do you guys think?
dfds I understand what you mean with switching to different POV. I am working on a story, and in chapter one, I have indicated to the readers that I switched different POV characters, and it may not be that hard. On the other hand, it can be if you are doing it over and over, especially in the middle of the scene. I don't find it hard to understand, but some do. This is why most people say that try to stay focus on one character at a time. If you have to switch POV characters, you might need to start another chatper, or indicate that you switched POV characters, add three stars after the scene. Mark wandered into the room and grabbed a Coke while simultaneously replaying the dialog with Stacy in his head. While he slumped at the table, contemplating every facial expression she had made, every pause, every word, Annie pursed her lips scowled angrily. "'Well you could say hello, Mark!' Mark jumped and eyed his roommate. 'Oh, hey. Didn't see you there.' * * * You never see me there[/I], Annie thought, biting back the urge to say something more nasty" You see, that the three stars show the readers that you switched POV characters. In my scene, I have three POV characters on the same chatper. Here is a sample of mine and how I dealt with multi POV characters. (I know some writers do it differently, but my personal taste is the three star notice. In this scene, Jason is the POV character A gasp came across Jason's ears. “My God! Sorry to hear that darling. Mom will protect you every step of the way. Oh, and by the way, did I forget to tell you that we’re rich?” “What’s that supposed to mean?” “Well, we own land here. If you need anything, I’ll be more than welcome to help, sweetie.” He covered the mouthpiece. “Yeah right,” and removed his hands from the earpiece. “Oh, that’s, that’s nice, I suppose. And Guess what Mom. I made a few friends here. Though twin sisters I met last night.” “Ohm." “Becky and Christina,” he continued as Tom exited the ceremony. “Wait Mom, here’s Dad. You should talk to him.” I switched POV characters. Now Tom is the focus point of the story. * * * He snatched the phone to the extreme, that he nearly dropped it. “Hello?” “How you’re doing?” she asked. “How’s life going for you?” “Well um, Jason and I had quality time together. We even run a club.” He wrapped his arms around Jason's shoulder. “That’s cool, I…” “We’re moving home to see you.” “Yeah, Jason told me about that. Alright dear, one more thing, What’s with the club?” “Oh.” The empty look on his face seemed as if he knew nothing about it. “It’s basically about hanging around and stuff. Me and Jason work there for the twins, so I collect the money and stuff, and Jason, well uh, the Conflict Manager. So now—“ She interrupted, fighting him to conclude the conversation. “I see, I see. Anyway, I got some things I have to do. I’ll see y'all when you get here…” “Well alright, babe. See you later.” He clicked the phone. The moment Jason been waiting for, is that he finally prepared himself to leave California. You didn’t know how blessing this was when Dad told him to pack his bags. Perhaps, living here was the worse state he ever lived in, so they rode down the road to the airport. Ten minutes went by. Just as he were riding to Mom's house, someone cut him off. “Buddy back off! This isn’t NASCAR racing!” He flicked his middle finger at him as Jason covered his face. “O yeah? Screw you!” The racer pointed both of them back at him. * * * He couldn’t believe his eyes; Richard was here! He recalled on him because of the light skin and the same long black beard on his chin, so he excitedly dashed into him expecting good news. “Aye bro? What what’s good?” he said, attempting a response out of him. Kelly took her glasses off and frowned. “Jason, hon, Richard... And aren’t you going to say hi to your mom?”
Yes, shifting the point of view like that within a scene is considered a fault in fiction. It's a fault because it's distracting to the reader. Yes, it fits within the powers of a third person omniscient narrator, but it's still distracting to the reader. It's jarring. Not only do you need to stop doing it, but you need to tune your inner ear to catch anything like it and eliminate it while your revising your rough draft . I think the common term for that fault is "head hopping." In your example, the omniscient narrator is "focused" on Mark's thoughts; therefore, the reader is focused on Mark's thoughts. When the focus suddenly shifts, the reader becomes disoriented. Mark loses his identity and it's as if both characters (Mark and Annie) are the same person. Thanks for bringing up an excellent point and providing an excellent example. --Edward
Reggie: I hear what you're saying. The thing is that I think I do it too frequently for the *** trick to make sense. The example of a scene I gave is pretty much exactly how I write, and I may switch back and forth five or more times during the course of a 5 or 6 page scene depending on convenience and importance of each character's vantage point. I really don't think it would be appropriate to use *** every few paragraphs, particularly when the scene isn't really broken. Once Annie finishes her thought, Mark might very well take over like so: "You never see me there, Annie thought, biting back the urge to say something more nasty. There was a long silence. Mark sipped his Coke loudly. Despite the obscene amount of corn syrup dissolved in the amber liquid, it tasted bitter and did nothing to quench the biting thirst on his tongue. "How is it, Mark?" Annie must have asked with a little more bitterness than she had intended, because Mark raised his eyebrows quizzically." I just feel like it would be inappropriate and redundant to separate it after every paragraph...but thanks for the detailed answer. I may just employ *** more often. And for those of you who are skimming this and not really reading it, I am not cussing after every word! *** = * * *
Have the people that have been saying it is wrong read your work? I have never found what you have posted here confusing. Does it make for a good story, is it confusing etc? Sometimes doing what shouldn't do can be a flash of brilliance - other times the disaster it should be. What is your opinion ?
