Am I considered "different"?

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by MatrixGravity, Apr 23, 2012.

  1. bibliolept

    bibliolept New Member

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    Not wanting a tattoo doesn't make you "different", just like wanting one doesn't make you "unique". There are people who think tattoos and piercings are aesthetically appealing, and there are some who don't. The reasons for them getting body modifications are their own. You know what's not different? Judging people based on cosmetic things like piercings, tattoos, etc. These "crowds" of teenagers are driven together by a sense of belonging: they like the same things, they like tattoos, they like the same music. They've found common ground.

    They like that kind of stuff. Good for them.
    You don't. Good for you.

    What makes us all "different" is the fact that we, as people, have varying backgrounds and beliefs. That's what makes you different. Thinly veiled elitism does not.
     
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  2. killbill

    killbill Member

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    Be who you are, and respect who others are, that's the advice I'll give.

    Regarding the advice 'don't do things to please others' I would say that's kind of difficult. In some way or the other, consciously or subconsciously you will invariably do things to please others in your life. It is inevitable. Just don't lose your SELF doing so. This I think is a more practical advice.
     
  3. jazzabel

    jazzabel Agent Provocateur Contributor

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    To me it sounds like you are somewhat prejudiced towards certain groups of teenagers. So they are superficially different to you. So what? I am sure you are not the only person who doesn't have a tattoo or a piercing at the age of 19. Perhaps you should live and let live. Be confident n your choices and don't resent choices other people make. If you delve deeper, you'll see that there is much more to a person than what band they listen to or whether they have or not have a piercing or a tattoo.

    When I got my tattoo at 19, it was not fashionable to do so. I was very different from the young people around me, and my tattoo wasn't to "comply" with a trend but to help me transition from something deeply hurtful I experienced in my life. Be careful when you devalue people because of a characteristic you dislike or don't necessarily understand the meaning of. Not everyone who has a tattoo has been to prison, or mainstream, or a rebel just like not everyone who doesn't have a tattoo or a piercing isn't goody two shoes, or responsible or not been to prison. Prejudices based on how people look have it's purpose, but that purpose is limited, especially in this day and age.
     
  4. jazzabel

    jazzabel Agent Provocateur Contributor

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    Most people I know don't have tattoos because they are trying to "beautify" themselves. Tattooing is an ancient custom of marking milestones or important things in one's life. Most people I know have tattoos for the same reason, and they are deeply meaningful to them. Who are you to poo-poo someone else's choices? You compare painting my own skin to someone desecrating a world famous fresco, and say they/I should be arrested for ruining something beautiful. My skin is not yours. You have no right to expect my skin will remain "clean" for your personal enjoyment. Who even gives you the right to determine what I will do with my own skin?
    And what is next? Will you hate on ugly people, fat people, people who spent all their lives working hard so their faces are lined with deep wrinkles? People with haircuts and beards you dislike? Because all those people did something to their appearance that you might fing unattractive.

    You are free to "hate" tattoos all you want, but you should not be disrespectful towards others in this way.
     
  5. Mystique23

    Mystique23 New Member

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    My view is a little skewed...most of the tattoos I have seen growing up have some sort of meaning to the person who has them (ie. a Maori moko.) It's also rather rare where I am to see teenagers wearing an extreme amount of piercings or tattoos. I have my ears pierced and am thinking about a tattoo, but if I get one it will be my own choice and a meaningful one.
    But being different is not bad. I can happily say that I was VERY different in high-school and sometimes got flak for it, but being different has made me the person I am today. I certainly realize what a gift it is too be comfortable in your own skin, but it's not as hard as some think. I think a some of people (small-minded people) equate being different with being abnormal in some way. These people do not appreciate diversity and should be ignored.
    I'm sorry...I seem to be meandering a bit. The point is, if you're happy with the way you are, then there's no reason to change just because others say you should.
     
  6. simplyrachel

    simplyrachel New Member

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    you're not differnet. everyone else is different from YOU! haha.
     
  7. The Tourist

    The Tourist Banned

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    Things come and go, but I think there's an old adage that might help.

    Yogi Berra was a catcher for a baseball team, and he was known to make strange comments that often proved to be true. Like, if there was a close game with the momentum on the other side he would remark, "It aint over till it's over." Well, of course that's true, but lots of people often think a game is sunk when both teams are still on the field.

    I believe this is one of his old adages on fads and crazes. He commented on a fad restaurant by saying, "The place is so crowded that no one goes there anymore."

    I feel the same about tattoos. I see some of the guys at bike shops with an entire armful of tattoos. It's a fad to see bikers that way. However, lots of these guys are in their early twenties. They have little experience in the world, so the tats mean nothing except for decoration. So in trying to be rough-tough bikers they just look like every other bored housewife.

    So, "everybody's doing it" and now no one wants to. Yogi was right.
     
  8. jazzabel

    jazzabel Agent Provocateur Contributor

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    Just because someone is in their early twenties doesn't mean they haven't experienced a lot. By the time I was 19 I've been through hell and back which is something that certain people would know nothing about. I am happy they are ignorant, because most likely it means their lives were kinder to them than mine to me, but sweeping generalisations and prejudices like this are really annoying.
    Be happy that you have no idea, but be respectful to other's experience.
     
  9. 123456789

    123456789 Contributor Contributor

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    Matrix,
    Where in NY do you live.
     
  10. Gonissa

    Gonissa New Member

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    Bah, just be yourself. Don't worry about if you conform or don't conform. After all, anti-conformity isn't actually anti-conformity, it's just conformity to different standards.
     
  11. The Tourist

    The Tourist Banned

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    I'm sorry that you have experienced that side of life, I sincerely hope you life is better in the future.

    As for future opposing viewpoints to your response or any others, I will only discuss those issues in PM form.
     
  12. simplyrachel

    simplyrachel New Member

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    i as well have been through my own personal hell. but for some odd reason i keep pulling through :p
     
  13. heyitsmary

    heyitsmary New Member

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    At 23, I'm not too heavy into tattoos or piercings, but I know a lot of people my age who are and a lot who aren't.
    Sometimes I feel like a complete freak among my peers because so many of them are out drinking and partying while I'm sitting at home watching movies or reading/writing. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only person my age who is acting that way! But you know what? I'm not.
    "Normal" is a relative term. What's common to one person might be totally foreign to another. As a result, "different" is a relative term as well. Do what you're comfortable with and/or what you believe is best. Like several other people have mentioned, following a trend is not necessarily a bad thing if it's something you want to do...but at the same time, steering away from one you don't like is okay too. You're always going to be influenced by people around you, whether it's your peers, co-workers, family, or friends. But I think people sometimes focus too much on being "different" or "conformist," and not enough on being themselves.
     
  14. killbill

    killbill Member

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    The odd reason might be that you are mentally strong, just what the doctor (or God, if you believe in one) ordered to live this life.
     
  15. Mell

    Mell New Member

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    Everyone is "different". You can basically put everyone into some kind of category of similar people, and they will still seem "different" to someone. No one is entirely unique, with no similarities to anyone else in any way. You might like some super obscure band or philosophy, but someone else very likely does, also.
     
  16. Yoshiko

    Yoshiko Contributor Contributor

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    It's actually more likely they came together because of their similar interests. ;)

    I was working on the plans for a documentary at the start of the year on body image & modification -- that was scrapped early on in favour of a topic we believed would generate more interest -- and the research we conducted did show that the majority of people in our targeted age group (18-25; almost an equal male:female ratio) were interested in piercings/tattoos despite vastly differing hobbies, backgrounds and current employment/study. Of course, there were also a number of people who didn't show an interest in these things but we didn't see any major difference in hobbies/interests between these people and those who do want/have piercings/tattoos.

    I wouldn't say you're "different" for not liking them though.
     
  17. aimeekath

    aimeekath New Member

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    'Different' is good! It just means that you're not a boring follower, and that you have your own mind.
     
  18. Boriol

    Boriol New Member

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    I've never liked tattoos or piercings, but I don't hold anything against people that do have them. Whether it means something to them or not doesn't matter to me. I don't know by looking at them. I look at someone and see them as a person, not a person with or without tattoos or piercings. It would be stupid to judge them based on such things.

    I say that, but I still find piercings and tattoos quite ugly. Whether it was conditioned or if I was born that way, I don't know. If anything, the rising number of girls getting belly piercings turns me away from looking at adult magazines because I just can't stand them. Therefore, I get a lot of work done in the time some other guys would spend looking through that stuff.

    Making a statement? Deep emotional significance? Did it because your friends did? Like the way they look? Whatever the reason, we're all human, and what makes us human has nothing to do with how many needles have gone into our bodies. In the times when appearance is all that matters (i.e. adult magazines), yeah, it can make a difference. Otherwise, in person, not at all. Not for me, anyway.

    Different? Every multi-pierced, tattooed teenager standing in their groups talking about their newest favorite band is different. There are sixteen basic personality types and nearly seven billion unique people. Even the word "normal" is a variable. Normal black guy. Normal white kid. Normal Indian. Normal girl. Normal boy. Normal actor. Normal teenager. Normal writer. I'd go on, but I think I'm losing my point already.
     

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