OK, I was wondring whether or not that this plot was ok or not, or whether it was too cliche ect. An unkillable man saves a woman from a pack of beasts. She has orders to get to the queen of the three worlds, and so the two travel together. In another completely different world, Hell has just won a massive victory over Heaven, and the main villain has melded the two together. In the other worlds, shards of a sword have been discovered. The man and the woman are still travelling, when more beasts attack and the woman is killed. The man discovers that she holds the last shard, and when he touches it, the other shards gravitate to it and he is given the only weapon that can kill the villain. More happens after that, and I can be far more elaborate, but I want to know whether you would be more interested in hearing the rest before I post it.
It sounds promising, though I'm not much of a fantasy gal. I guess the thing which is missing is basically elaboration, but since this is just a summary I'd give a heads up. I have never heard of this concept as such.
I don't care for how the girl just dies and he finds a sword shard on her. Perhaps with her final few breaths she gives him the shard? and I'd make a few chapters about him seeking the other shards & the hilt. Of course, that's me, you can do whatever you want. I'd possibly keep reading depending on how you present the first half.
Yeah I was just thinking of how to make it summarised; I will be putting chapters of him seeking out the shards, as I need to get the reader familiar with the concept of the three worlds. Also, I was thinking of making the woman die while the main character is helpless. That would drive him on his quest to do what he has to do. I think I'll make another thread with a much longer plot thingy.
Or make it that she IS the last shard. He discovers this during the quest, and refuses to cause her death, even to defeat the evil. At some point, she discovers the truth as well, and sacrifices herself at the crucial moment to complete the weapon and save her people.
I very much liked that idea. Or even, she's the KEY to obtaining it. But if the main character is as unlikeable as I was thinking when you mentioned it, he wouldn't care about the lady dying. Will he grow attached to her? Make sure to include that stuff in your next plot summary.
Thanks for the feedback. I will include more stuff in my next summary. And to let you know he does grow slightly attached to her. I also wonder why you think he is unlikeable? He may be a bit harsh sometimes but before he meets the woman, he takes care of the spirits of children who die in the forest. When they manifest he acts like a father to them. He does get more likeable though, at least I hope he does.
An unkillable man saves a woman from a pack of beasts. that's where I figured he was unlikeable =P oooooh! Unkillable. Sorry about that, dyslexia got the best of me on that word. But making him unkillable doesn't seem very fun...perhaps don't make him seem immortal, I don't think readers enjoy a one-sided story.
He doesn't know that he is unkillable he just thinks he is extremely lucky and quite skilled. Also if he is given a fatal wound it takes a t least an hour for him to return. Also if he is poisoned, pain forever. Also, later him and his new ally have to go to "Hell" and you can only go there when you are dead. Thats when he discovers he can't die. So his companion must go through hell by her self. And he feels incredibly guilty about that. Theres also the whole love someone, watch them die scenario.
