what are dark thoughts? I believe we are all prone to them and by airing them out would be I believe interesting and less darker then they seem. How often do you encounter yourself having ''dark thoughts'' ? Thank you for sharing
Daily. "Dark thoughts" is a broad term. It can mean thoughts about violence or death, or just negative thoughts, and everything in-between.
Exactly this. For me, I would say dark thoughts were thinking about death and self harm in it's many forms. That said, I do think about death fairly often, but I am not suicidal. I wish my life were easier in places, but who doesn't? The amount of emotional suffering I endure means that I don't have any need for self harm! I haven't tried to end my life for 8 years now, and I am very proud of that. I wear it as a metaphorical badge of honour.
To me, it's any conscious or unconscious thought that deprives of happiness. Thoughts of harming others or myself, the thoughts that tell me I'm not good enough and will never be. The thoughts that make any effort seem pointless and futile. Anxiety about the future. The thoughts that make me wish a friend would stop smoking and lose weight so he won't die of lung cancer or a stroke before he's even fifty. Sometimes it helps to share these thoughts, sometimes it only makes them seem even more substantial. How often? Every day.
All day?? I am taken aback. I am just interested on the expression to see if we all share the same ''dark thoughts''.
For 8 years? That is proper impressive and very well done. What were you going through before that? I hope you do not mind me asking.
The better question would be what was I not going through. I was diagnosed with depression just before my 15th birthday, my dad died that November, just after my mum's birthday, and a week short of his own. I flunked my GCSEs, my sister left home for the first time, and I was going through the joys of being a teenager. Add in homework, coursework, boyfriends, my own emotional problems and trying to come to terms with my family unit falling apart, I was pretty screwed up about it all. Because of my character, and compounded by the depression and strong medication, I couldn't process my feelings properly. That continued to screw me up for the next 15 years. I was later diagnosed with Emotionally Unstable Borderline Personality Disorder when I was pregnant with my first daughter. She gave me the strength to stop hurting myself. It is only recently that all of that is starting to subside, and I contribute that to a number of things. Both of my girls give me strength and hope. I am not on any medication, or hormonal contraceptives. Due to my age, my hormones seem to have settled down, and I have a wonderful guy by my side. Things look and feel bright, and I am truly happy for the first time in my life, despite my uncertain situation.
I get crazy jealous of happy couples and groups of friends - then I feel terribly guilty, and think to myself 'they're most likely very nice people who are well-deserving of their happiness'. Also pestered by memories of the crap I had to put up with in high school...and I'm beginning to think that I'm taking this post too far.
You are not alone in that. I used to be the same until recently. It is hard to see other people happy when you feel shite yourself. There's no shame in that. Take it as far as you need to, if it helps to get it out. You'll find support on here for all sorts of things, and when you feel happier, there's always memes around the place to make you laugh.
I found it was a combination of things: productivity, distraction, creativity, something yummy to eat when it's cooked, and you get to thump the dough!
Totally relate. I'm going through something myself at this current period of my life. I'm not physically harming myself, but I've been having recent episodes of PTSD.
As it happens, I find that fictional characters with PTSD are the most interesting. I know there are worst thing that can happen to a person than kids picking on them. I am both curious and too afraid to ask - I know some people are open to sharing, but others are more private about their 'inner demons'.
I am in the process of attending a weekly mindfulness meditation class. It's been very interesting, and has already given me simple tools to distance myself from 'dark thoughts' ...worry, angst, pessimism, etc. The trick is recognising these thoughts and deciding not to dwell on them. Mindfulness helps you to recognise the control you have over these kinds of thoughts. If your thoughts reflect real, solvable problems, removing yourself from their depressive influence can give you a calm space, where you can actually work out a way to solve the problems. Win-win. I guess you're never too old to learn new tricks!
I cultivate dark thoughts. They pervade my songwriting, so I need them. If anything I worry about being too happy, as then I fear I won't be able to write. In general, the dark thoughts I experience (and write about) seem to revolve around paranoia, isolation, futility and interaction. I'm hoping life will provide sufficient material without me either running out or deciding it's not worth writing about it any more.
My dark thoughts often turn into some fictional scene based on my current creative projects at the time. We all need inspiration from somewhere..?
I have never been prone to suicidal thoughts, but I have gone to a John Keats mind set (“I am in that temper that if I were under water I would scarcely kick to come to the top”). I have been in some pretty dark places where I've felt that if anything were to happen to me, I wouldn't try to fight to live. However, my writing reflects these dark thoughts in the sense that the majority of them do not have happy endings and deal in some kind of way with death. Not MY death or people I know.... just themes I seem to keep coming back to. A poem I wrote in middle school was called Circus of the Dead. It was a long poem about everything wrong with the world.... a kid in the circus because he was being abused, a smoker had lost her lung and it was on display, a girl that wrapped her car around a pole was on display as well and at the end, the ring master blamed the audience for the "freaks" on display. Boy, were my parents looking side-eyed at me for a while after that poem..... My work has seemed to follow those dark themes.
Trust me the places my mind goes is not for mortals, so please refrain from asking as dark thoughts are to me a place I would rather not discuss. Thank You. (My mind is a messed up place due to having a rather horrible childhood).
