I finally got up the courage to post something in the first-three-sentence thread... and no one commented. That seems like an active thread. I think beginnings are often tricky and more often than not I probably end up scrapping mine a few times before I can get it right. I tried. Maybe everyone just has me blocked.
I liked it shortly after you posted it, so that was something. Three sentences is a tiny sample for folks to judge so feedback is generally limited to grammar and word choice. Your entry was solid (imho) in those areas so I couldn't offer you much. It had a proper hook. I suspect I would have appreciated a few more details on how Bonnie endured being submerged, though I would have kept reading all the same. Edit: Also, no one commented on my three sentences either. It happens. @John Calligan liked it though, which I appreciated.
I understand your use of the word Fail. I posted the first chapter of Ragged Hearts. There are 9 views of which two are me editing. Know one even gave me a like. I don't know if people think it is garbage or the subject matter turned people off from reading it. I would like to know because if it's really bad, I have to find something else to do with my time. I thought it was good writing. I have no confidence in my writing ability.
Or maybe people have lives! It's the last days of summer, there are other priorities. But, since you're here milking the communal attention, I'd reiterate that your first three puppies are sprightly, although in need of some combing down and fluffing up. It's definitely not a Fail. It could make a good beginning for a nice story. Technically, it has all the elements of a good beginning. It's like textbook good first three sentences (after editing). Really.
