Firstly, I'm aware this isn't a new problem with writers. I've written all of my life and have started and stopped countless times. I've produced upwards of 500 pages toward various projects since 2015, but most of these are all shorter works or stories set within a larger personal "world-building" project which I don't plan to publish. I can never seem to complete a novella. I've tried at least four times. The longest story I ever wrote was 68k words, but I ended up putting this on hold. I told myself that my latest project, a novella, would be the work I finally try to send out to publishers or self-publish, that this would be different, but my interests are always shifting. I'll elaborate. I was inspired by the fantastically ethereal and gorgeous prose of Peake, therefore I started a fantastical novella. I drew character sketches, planned for several weeks and then wrote about 8,000 words, but in the last few days I've begun to struggle with this story. I've always had a love-hate relationship with fantastical settings. Half of what I write is realistic, humanistic fiction, the other half leans toward atmospheric and strange imagery. I personally feel like fantasy world-building, even if it's not an important part of the story and the characters are front and centre, acts as a handicap for my writing. This latest project started off well, I think, and I truly felt like it was something new. Now it just feels stale and like something I'd write. It doesn't help that I'm always shifting in my interests and always being influenced by the last thing I read. I read Chekhov and now I feel my story isn't serious enough (despite that fact that it deals with introversion, has themes of suicide, etc.) or it's not in the style I truly want because it's dressed as fantasy. I always feel the next thing I write will be more sophisticated. The imagery sustained this latest idea, but I feel like I just want to write stories set in the real world without any of the constraints of world-building, research and everything else that goes into creating a novel setting. Honestly, it feels like I'm ruled by spurts of inspiration and that I've just awoken to find out, once again, that my latest project isn't exactly what I wanted to write. But that's not entirely true. It's complicated. I'm not looking for validation and I'm not asking for guidance. I just wanted to share this.