Friends come and go...

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Hwaigon, May 7, 2015.

  1. Mckk

    Mckk Member Supporter Contributor

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    But reading your post, I personally think what you have sounds like you already have the dream :supersmile: (mostly focusing on the steady relationship and the adorable pets lol)

    That's the thing I guess - it's like society, the people around you, think everyone's gotta have the same dream or you're somehow "missing" something. But if you have love and peace in your life and you're content, then what does it matter?
     
    Shadowfax and Spencer Rose like this.
  2. Spencer Rose

    Spencer Rose Member

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    @Mckk thActs exactly what I mean. Dreams shouldn't be based on the "American Dream" or Finnish dream or wherever you're from. Dreams are yours. They're personal. And the only one who can make those drama reality is you. You shouldn't have to sacrifice personal desires to comic ate someone else's idea of normalcy. Life is too short. We only get one shot. Make it count. Make it everything you want and never regret it.
     
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  3. Shadowfax

    Shadowfax Contributor Contributor

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    I'd advise against that on the practical grounds that twice as many children means twice as much work.

    While both moms having a child sounds great, it would mean that there wouldn't be a "surplus" partner to give you a break...and, believe me, there will be a time when you want need a break.
     
  4. KaTrian

    KaTrian A foolish little beast. Contributor

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    Of course, but to each their own. I don't know if I'd survive even one. I hardly manage babysitting (catsitting?) a cat, or at least I'm ready to give it back after a few days. Can't give the baby back, so maybe it's better to sort my own life out before making it a part of somebody else's.
     
  5. Mckk

    Mckk Member Supporter Contributor

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    Yup, totally. And I thought I might tell you that auto-cucumber ate your post... :supergrin:
     
  6. 123456789

    123456789 Contributor Contributor

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    This is a popular belief these days, but really isn't it just the definition of selfishness? Also shortsightedness. With 7 billion people on the planet, and counting, and some of us growing up with more advantages than others, I'd personally like to see a stronger sense of responsibility and mindfulness- (what exactly that entails, course, is another discussion.)
     
  7. Mckk

    Mckk Member Supporter Contributor

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    That sorta depends on what it is you want, I think. When I read Spencer's post, I was actually reminded of what my husband once said to me. He always reminds me how life is transient and nothing lasts, how death will be a release from suffering (he's a little bleak sometimes) - and because of this, he says he likes to live life in such a way that he won't regret it when he comes to the end.

    And his definition of a life he won't regret? It's a life of kindness and service. I've never met a kinder man. He is kind to the homeless and stranger on the street, the old grandma about to get on the tram, the waiter in the restaurant. He is kind to his family and mine. He is kind to everyone who's ever come to him for help. He once spent 2-3 hours translating someone's wedding speech from English to Czech because this someone bumped into him, asked him for directions, they got chatting and he found out the couple was on here to attend their son's wedding and the bride is Czech, and in an effort to welcome her the father had wanted to make his speech in Czech. My husband had never met these people before. He then sent them an email with detailed instructions on where they could get the translated speech printed. When someone at church asks him to fix up their computer, sometimes he does not ask for money or only asks for a low price because the person's unemployed.

    So I dunno. I wouldn't say that's selfish, at least not him anyway. It just depends on what it is you mean when you say, "A life you want and won't regret".
     
    Spencer Rose and Ivana like this.
  8. PiP

    PiP Contributor Contributor

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    I'm xx yrs old and by the time you get to my age and most of your friends are drawing their pension you look back and think: if only :(

    Friends do come and go... mostly die. It's not that I'm old - I have older friends with young minds and sick bodies. :)
     
  9. james82

    james82 Active Member

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    "As time went on we saw less and less of Teddy and Vern, until eventually they became just two more
    faces in the halls. It happens sometimes, friends come in and out of your like like busboys in a
    restaurant..."


    Always loved that.
     
  10. Gigi_GNR

    Gigi_GNR Guys, come on. WAFFLE-O. Contributor

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    It's weird to see people on Facebook and have the thought "I used to go to high school with them." I'm only 20 but it feels so strange.
     
  11. Neha

    Neha Beyond Infinity. Contributor

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    The strangest thing for me is, there are classmates I have who have kids, or have recently gotten married, girls I grew up with - and some of them in an arranged marriage context - and here I am, not even wanting a relationship. Forget wanting to get married! All I'm focused on right now is my career and future, and I feel that every body feels that way.

    Then I realize they don't, and then I just feel weird.
     
  12. JessAlways

    JessAlways Member

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    Friends do come and go.
    I was homeschooled, so never really met many people. They had homeschool groups and things, I would go to those. I had a few "friends." Turned out they were just using me for whatever.
    I can never have more then six friends it seems. I have four, at the moment. Three are a few years older, the other is my age.
    Problem is, I can't talk to them often. Those four get along very, very well. When I am there, I feel as if I am ruining their fun. I stay quite, and let them talk.
    Two of the friends are actually engaged. So they are pretty busy planning the wedding and stuff....I don't know. I'm just waiting for something to happen and these friends just leave. Everyone seems to with me.
     
  13. JessAlways

    JessAlways Member

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    Starting to feel as if I am losing friends. I've never been that great at making them, and keeping them.
    I have 3, but I feel as if they are backing away.
    I love hanging out, so I try to plan as much as I can with them. But they never seem to want to do anything, or they can't..
     

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