You've tried all that you could. I still say wake up your parents. Just tell them a friend of yours tried to kill herself. They can try to help. It won't hurt.
Folks online here are limited on what can be done to assist. Parents are the folks to wake up, even if it is early in the morning.
well unfortunately theres not much you can do at this point just wait it out hopefully, she'll be fine and in most cases, they are, people who are deadset (at least in my experience) about commiting suicide seldom tell anyone about their intentions, infact most of the time it's a spur of the moment decision.
Yeah...you're kind of helpless in this situation. It's a horrible feeling. Last year while I was away, my best friend sent me a suicide text message. He wouldn't answer his phone, and no one seemed to know where he was. I was up all night. Turns out he got drunk and tried to throw himself in front a car on the highway. But he was so drunk that he couldn't calculate how fast he'd have to go to get in front of the car, so he just ran into the side of it and bruised himself up. The people whose car it was called 911.
I concur. Very unfair, personally I'd be mean enough to leave it alone whether she's joshing you or not. I mean letting it slip to someone who can walk and in stop it because she subconsciously wants to be rescued is one thing, but to someone miles away and all these privacy policies to prevent net stalking also preventing any chance to help... it's just above and beyond the call of inconsiderate.
She's not alone though Lucy, when I were your age, this used to happen to me frequently and my 'friend' would just lay this enormous weight upon my shoulders by listing all these intentions she had to harm herself, and I felt really responsible for them- it's only now I realise that I am not (and never were), and alot of the time, in spite of whether they really are a true friend, the people who do these kinds of things to you are just looking for acknowledgement, I suppose, the indication someone cares- events like these, in my opinion, are more an indication of low self esteem than serious suicide-risks. It's all very unfair, and how you choose to handle it is entirely up to you, but in my case, I simply had to let go of all the 'friends' (including her, obviously) I had that kept obliging me to bear their burdens for them- this doesn't mean you don't have to care for them, it just means you form a line between that which you can help and that which you cannot.
I am really sorry that you have had to endure something like this. It is not easy when something like this happens. I went through a similar situation myself once, only to find out at a later date it was just a lie. A very silly lie. I've not forgiven the people involved either. But that is neither here nor there. I only hope that this person is ok. You have done everything you can in this situation, so if it has gone badly, do not ever blame yourself. And if need be, speak with someone about it, like your parents for one. My thoughts are with you. I really do hope that all turns out ok... Hugs Torana
Wow, good timing. I read through this whole thread to find out the result of the girl's health had just been revealed. Good to know she's okay. I think she was attention seeking, personally.
that really is great to hear, Lucy. And attention seeking or not, it is something that you really can't ignore. Because if you do... you never know what may happen. You handled the situation really well. It is just great to hear that she is alright. Hugs to you.
I hope that with time and support from good friends, and hopefully family, she is able to find a way to deal with this hardship she is now faced with. She is lucky to have a friend like you, that cares so greatly for her well being.
Hasn't drank anything in 4 days? Although it may not seem likely, last night may very well have been an attention seeking episode, one dumped on you. In either case, I hope your friend gets things straightened out, or finds the help she needs. Terry
she should go see a doctor as her body will be heavily dehydrated. It could have also done damage to internal organs (liver/kidney/stomach lining) if she hasn't drank and has over dosed to a degree on medications.
The reason for her behavior does not matter. The result was/is life threatening and she needs professional help. If you genuinely care about this person, you should NOT be an enabler. Tell her to get therapy or you will cut off the relationship. If you continue to act as a willing "ear", you may actually facilitate her ultimate death. Have you heard the expression, "accidental death by suicide?" This is actually quite common, where a passive dependent person "acts out" with a suicide gesture, not really expecting to die, but the result turns out to be fatal anyway. I know of one such person who took an entire bottle of sleeping pills ten minutes before her boyfriend was due home from work. Obviously, he was supposed to find her in time. He had a flat tire! So, don't enable such behavior. Tell her to get treatment or don't bring you into her problems. I know it sounds mean but it is necessary in my opinion.
Lucy E, NaCl's advice is not something to readily dismiss. The statement you posted: reads as classic manipulation. Of course, you know the situation better than anyone online here, but if you stepped away and looked at it objectively, I think you will find validity to the comments made. Place that statement quoted above with the events of last night...her scaring you with overdose, knowing you really had no way to do anything about it. Do the two really jive?
It was definitely attention-seeking behaviour. But I wouldn't abandon anyone like that. If everyone ignores and abandons these people, they just fall into deeper and deeper pits. I think it's heartless behaviour to stay away from these people. They need help. Just be aware of what they are doing and why so it doesn't master you and torment you.
Just keep in mind that the attention you give her when she is "commiting" suicide is never going to be enough. She's going to do it over and over, unless you put a stop to it. You have to tell her to quit her ****. I've dealt with this stuff before, and I've seen other people deal with it. I understand that sometimes you don't want to take the risk, attention seeking or not, because of how much you love the person. I still get texts from my sister asking what pills would kill her easiest. I know that she wants the attention, so I give her what she wants but I tell her after that i'm not going to put up with it, and I ignore her. She's still alive.
Lucy, Your "role" in this relationship IS an enabling action. You are succumbing to her manipulation in a mutually destructive relationship. It is your choice to extinguish YOUR OWN part in this co-dependent friendship or to continue your part in the inevitable escalation, potentially resulting in "accidental death by suicide". Part of becoming an adult is learning to say "no". Take a hard stand . . . for your own benefit as much as hers. I wish you the best.
I'm sorry guys, but I really don't think it's wise to be giving out advice on whether she should break off the friendship considering that none of us are experts on the subject and that is a very serious decision to be making. Having been through a similar situation yourself doesn't make a person qualified, neither does having read up on it. We don't have the whole story, we don't know the person, and we don't know if Lucy is being an enabler or a stabilizer in their relationship without even having met either one of them. Lucy, you've heard some intelligent opinions, but in the end that is all they are. I would do everything you can to find someone who deals with this sort of thing professionally and ask that person. See if your parents will help out. I don't think that would be too much of a streatch considering what effect this can have on you. Good luck.
