Yeah, I feel as though the internet simply acts as a tool to meet people you might not have seen otherwise. We integrate the web into so many other aspects. It all just seems natural to me. Personally, I have yet to meet anyone from a dating site, but I did make a few short-term friends. My winter break would have been hell without them. Although, there was a case where I went to eat with a girl I shared these long passing glances with, then messaged her on Facebook. I wasn't sure how long it would be until I saw her again, and didn't have a way to contact her otherwise. She is always busy though, so not too much happened from that. I think it is a bit like shopping online, actually. While it can be convenient, there is an absence of "feeling" what you're going to purchase, so you have to rely more heavily on instincts to lessen the chance of buyer's remorse. If only you could get reviews...
Consider the days when preople would get to know one amother though correspondence. Internet introduction is no different - only quicker. Now compare thet to meetingsomeone in a noisy bar, both of you buzzed or worse. Most of your assessment of one another id based on visual and tactile, filtered through "beer goggles". What could possibly go worong wit that. Sure, either way, people can lie, or only let you see their most attractive side. But through corresopndence or Internet, the aspects being showcased are thoughts, interests, creativity. People do meet at work or in school. Meeting at work introduces new complications - mixing a work relationship with a love relationship is hazardous. What I;m getting at is that meeting through the Internet is probably at least as good as most traditional means.
I totally agree. Great point Cogito (hey, were you intoxicated while you were composing that?) LOL. Carmina and Ashleigh: I'm the same way! I think I make friends more easily because it's harder to blurt out something stupid when you've had time to compose and think it through, edit it and click 'post'. In person, the only time I open my mouth is to switch feet. Hey, where'd the Bard of Wigan go? What's your answer in all of this?
I think it's possible to form friendships with people online... One of my closest friends is best friends with a girl who lives in melbourne.. they've never met before.. but they seem to feel comfortable with each other enough for her to be cool with the idea of him flying over there in August to stay for a couple of months. I don't think it's possible to fall in love online however.. friendship involves a sense of detachment, so the importance of physical contact and interaction isn't as paramount as say, verbal or written communication (imo). Falling in love, yeah it requires friendship, however for it to grow and develop in complexity it needs the two people in question to be in physical contact with another, and, on a regular basis.. or at least.. in however amount suffices for both people. This is just my opinion from my experience. I like meeting new people, in real life and online. I find the internet to be a cool medium like that because it allows for a sort of, freedom, in communication that I wouldn't otherwise have. Chances of me being able to afford to travel the world and meet people from different places is pretty slim at the moment, lol, so the internet is the next best thing for me. I understand that it is restricting.. but I accept that.. I also accept the opinion that to some a 'friendship' with someone online is never a proper 'friendship' because you've never physically met them before. I don't know. I guess how two people feel when they communicate is completely circumstantial, like in the case with my close friend- it's always going to be different, so the criteria in which constitutes a 'friendship' will also always be different.
I forgot to mention that my friend's current fiance is someone she had an online relationship with for over a year. They live together now.
i never tried dating online.....and not want to.. .. well i don't think "always answering their thread" is considered as ways of getting hitched... i find it funny..with this online "dating".....web cams and voice chats....uh! i would prefer the non-virtual way....
I know what you mean In my experience, the *only* way to make it work for real is to take the relationship OFF the internet as soon as possible, otherwise talking online becomes a habit and the relationship never really exists. Matt and I met on WF.org! Matt and I clicked immediately - we loved the same hobbies, tv shows, etc - he helped me with univeristy (i have him to thank for the fact i'm even going) and both our grandad's are sick, so we both had somebody to talk to about it. He called everyday after that. Matt being matt he gave me his number which i thought was rather flirtacious, but according to him he likes to be there for people because he's a christian and he believes in helping people. If you know matt -you'll know he doesnt lie, he's honestly that caring. So we spoke on the phone to hear eachothers accents and we ended up talking for hours! We laughed so much...i remember the whole conversation. So then it became obvious to eachother that there were feelings there - we just got on so well. HOWEVER! We didn't commit to anything, or have any *online* relationship before meeting in person. I think that's crucial - try and keep it relaxed and friendly until it's possible for you to meet eachother physically. Otherwise, if one backs out, it ends in heartbreak. You'll be left a fool, and nobody wants that. Lets face it- alot of people think they're in love, but they actually fall in love with that person on the internet - if they meet in person, they lose that, and it's all too real, so they back out. So matt and I met up as friends just after christmas, Kissed at the station, spent the day together - half of which was us discussing if a relationship would work -well, the kissing sorted that out haha. and the rest we just had fun out together. I was so amazed that he'd travelled all that way for me. I never imagined that i could meet somebody online and make it *work* but it has - he comes down to me during the week and stays with me all weekend, I spent a week with him at uni and i'm visiting his family in easter. I was with him just last night, and i'll be with him again saturday. Online can work as a good way of finding someone who really suits you -but whether it works afterwards as a real relationship is up to the two of you. Just dont let anybody string you along on an online relationship for a year with no intention of meeting you. Stay realistic, and sure - It can work. look at me and matt!
I never tried online dating, but don't have anything against it (2 really good friends of mine met their future spouses through online dating). For me, personally, I use machines so much for work that I don't want to feel I have to depend on one for my social life. That, and the fact that online dating reminds me of too much of looking for a job (entering all that personal data, salary, job description, etc.)
I've met several close friends online, as well as my first boyfriend. Come to think of it, I talk more to some of my online friends than the friends I have where I live...
I've never been part of a site with the express purpose of dating. There have been a few connections through social networking sites, but just friendships. Some lasting, some not so lasting. I don't know that I could ever date someone online. I could only use it as an intial meeting. There would have to be in person dates that followed. My last boyfriend, I knew from work, but we spent most of our time communicating online and got to know each other, but once we started hanging out, I learned he's not the same person. Even now, I'll talkt o him online and he comes off as a completely different person through MSN than face-to-face. So in conclusion (I seemed to have gone off topic here) I don't think I could date online if online was all there was. And I would never specifically look for someone through the internet. If it happened, it happened, but there would definitely have to be real life interaction.
Well, Dan and myself were basically on-line dating for quite a while and he then made the move from England to Australia and we are now happy and living together. A friend of mine also met her partner online and they are really happy and living together as well. I don't have anything against it, I just think that if you choose that option, you need to be careful as it is easier for predators to victimize people online. But you can have a happily ever after, just be damn careful with details you give out and if you meet the person... be extra careful!
well yah, there was this guy I met on orkut, and we really clicked, and we made plans to meet, I was like, wow, Shaan's such a great person, and told my friends all about 'him' Only it turned out that the guy was a girl. lol. I felt like such a big fool.
