1. Crash Test Dummy

    Crash Test Dummy New Member

    Aug 27, 2007
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    Hey Gang!

    Discussion in 'New Member Introductions' started by Crash Test Dummy, Aug 27, 2007.

    Well, I was just browsing around, and saw this place, and thought it might be a good place to crash for a while!

    I should probably tell you a bit about myself to start with. My name's 801194452300, but you can just call me 80119445. Or Crash, whichever is easiest.

    I was built in 1947, and spent most of my younger years working with the US air force in Groom lake, Nevada as a test pilot dummy. It was quite a dull job, really.

    In 1952 I was damaged quite severely in a little incident involving a rocket-propelled Lockheed D-21 drone. I came out second best, and was left in three storerooms for some time.

    Then, in 1957, this nice man came to see me, Werner was his name. He spoke at length of his increasing frustrations at the Air forces' non-cooperation with his rocket program, his family troubles, and the poor quality saki the USAF kept on base.

    A little while later, he came to see me again, he seemed much happier this time. Apparently, he had been given a great job at a place called NASA. He was really excited. So much so, that he offered me a job, his way of thanking me for sticking by him all this time. I now had a new purpose, a spacecraft test dummy.

    It was a fantastic job, although my first assignment didn't go so well. I was supposed to act as human-shaped ballast for an experimental craft called the X-20 Dyna-Soar. All was going well, untill they started the engines. These plutonium/hydrogen engines were never a good idea. I was getting pretty toasty by mile 10 000.

    It was around the point when I soared past the moon that I realized I was moving at a fairly good clip, and still accellerating exponentially. At mile 100 000 000, I noticed that we were approaching light speed frighteningly quickly. And just as quickly, the spacecraft kind of backflipped, and began to slow down, then stopped, and sped up once again, this time pointing directly at the earth.

    Atmospheric reentry was... Hot. And loud. I have to admit, I screamed like a little girl the whole time. During my panic, it occured to me that this was the first time I had screamed. It was also the first time that something had occured to me. I gasped, also for the first time. My legs kicked and my hand clenched. I was alive. I may have been an irradiated, time-travelling, and somewhat cowardly crash-test dummy, but I WAS ALIVE!

    Oh yes, the time travel thing. During my research following my crash landing in Western Australia. I discovered a little tidbit of research by a nice fellow named Albert. Basically, he said that time is relative, and that the faster one object moves in relation to annother, the slower it's personal time goes. This, I assumed, was why my 11 hour flight began in 1959, and ended in 1998.

    So technically, thought I was built 100 years ago, I'm only 21 years old. Pretty cool huh? Well, I thought so anyway.

    So, that's my story in brief. I look forward to working with all of you in the future. Or present, depending on your perspective.
  2. Charisma

    Charisma Transposon Contributor

    Jul 23, 2007
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    Lahore, Pakistan
    Welcome to the Writing forums, Crash. I'm anthraxx and am happy to learn that you are ready to...launch. We hope your past will not hinder your performance and we can a few...tips from you.

    Here's a basic welcome from all of us. It shoudl be obvious, but incase it isn't, let me explain. The Writing Problems Area is exclusively where opinions on different ways to write, blockages in writing styles and similar problems can be discussed. In the Review Rom, you can get critical appreciation and/or analysis of your written material. Behold, you must first review two pieces of writing before postign your own. This is ensure the pieces are evaluated to the most. Other than this, we have Writing Cotnests, weekly and monthly, where you can submit your writing. We also have Word games, Book Discussion and so on, classified under Community interaction. It may interest you if you're just hanging around.

    adamant has been kind enoguh to put many of the things I have mentioned or missed out on in one comprehensive place. If you want to check it out, see the Newbie Packets:

    Enjoy it here, and don't feel shy to ask for help. We are all here to teach and learn in a mutual environment. And we hope you can do the same.

    Regards and Best Wishes!
  3. Cogito

    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

    May 19, 2007
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    Massachusetts, USA
    Hello Crash, Welcome to the Writing Forums.

    Thank you for your imaginative and entertaining introduction. The fact that you went to the effort to do so says much about your motivation to write, and also hints at an interest in science fiction.

    If you haven't explored the site yet, you should probably do so soon. Newcomers often gravitate to the Lounge, the Word Games, or the Review Room, but there is much more to be discovered if you poke in the corners.

    As for the Review Room, new joiners often wonder why we do things a bit differently on this site than on other writing sites. We emphasize reviewing as a critical writing skill. Training your eye by reviewing other people's work helps you improve your own writing even before you present it for others to see. Therefore, we ask members to review other people's writing before posting work of their own. The Review Room on this site, therefore, is a true workshop, not just a bulletin board for displaying your work. See this post, Why Write Reviews Before Posting My Work? for more information.

    Enjoy your stay here, and have fun!
  4. Torana

    Torana Contributor Contributor

    Mar 13, 2007
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    Hello and welcome to the forum. I hope youhave a great time here with all of us.
    You should check out the weekly writing group. There are short story and poetry contests in there and I run them so I do hope that I see you enter at some stage inthe very near future.
    Any questions feel free to ask.
    Have fun and I shall see you around there boards.

  5. Budhabee

    Budhabee New Member

    Jul 29, 2007
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    Right now in Grand Junction, Colo.
    Hi Crash,
    Yes that was a pretty good introduction. Welcome to the forum.
  6. shadow tiger x

    shadow tiger x New Member

    Aug 12, 2007
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    The Australian funny farm. More than 5 minutes fro
    Welcome Crash to wf great to see more new members here with us i also was a new member about 2 weeks ago and i am still exploring the forum lots to see and read great fun to be had. Well i will look foward to reading your pieces. Have a good time here and i will see you around.

    shadow tiger x
  7. Gannon

    Gannon Contributor Contributor

    Jan 15, 2007
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    Manchester, England
    Once again absent for the wknd and voilĂ  an influx of new talented members - I hope all is to your liking. If you have any questions, let us have them, and we'll see what we can do. Thanks for you intro - a see a major new wf.org talent in the making! - for now, see you around the site!
  8. pyrox91992

    pyrox91992 New Member

    Dec 20, 2006
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    a place known only to those as dark as i
    happy belated welcome
  9. Kit

    Kit Contributor Contributor

    Apr 14, 2007
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    Hey there! Another belated welcome but here it goes anyways...

    Welcome to the forums! Hope you settle in ok and that you find what you're looking for here. Judging from your fantastic introduction though, i'm sure you'll have no trouble at all! If you have any questions or anything just PM me and i'd be happy to help. Look forward to seeing you around.

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