hi! To give you a bit of background, two dating and in love characters are currently in the hospital. One character is getting surgery due to the other fainting into their arms, and they both fell down a set of concrete stairs. The character who fainted is feeling SUPER guilty for landing their S/o in the hospital, and along with a bunch of other stuff is feeling horrible about dragging the other along on the trip, even though the other didn’t mind and isn’t angry. So the fainter is going to go into the hospital room after surgery, and then break up with the other so they don’t hurt them again. I’ll get them back together in the sequal though of course! But what would the best way for maximum amount of tears for one to part ways with the other? I rather not write what happens after the line,”I’m breaking up with you” and simply end the book there, so how could I make it extra sad before they break it off? Thanks so much!
Thing is, when you're breaking up with someone, the words "I'm breaking up with you" aren't the sad part. The sad part is the words and actions that come immediately after, when the two people realize the impact of what's just been said and that they won't be together anymore. The sad words are the "I wish things were different"s and the "I'll always love you"s and the "Take care of yourself"s. Or if the breakup isn't on good terms, the "How could you?"
It will be 'super sad' if your readers are invested in these two characters, convinced they love each other, and definitely WANT them to be together. And if the reason for the breakup is truly compelling. The situation itself, as you described it, could range from 'sad' to 'silly,' really—depending on circumstances. "I dragged you along on this trip, even though you didn't want to come ...even though you did ...and we had an accident, so now I'm breaking up with you so it won't happen again," might be a bit of an overreaction. At least it seems that way to me. Especially, as they are both in love and you intend to get them back together again. This breakup might feel somewhat artificial, unless you make the reason for it something that truly feels inescapable. To the character AND the reader. Something you start building into the story from the very beginning. (I'm assuming male/female characters here, just for the ease of writing he and she to differentiate between them, but the same principle would apply to a same-sex relationship.) Is this a character who is chronically negative? The kind who constantly blames himself for everything that goes wrong in his life? Does he often set himself up for failure because he feels he deserves no less? These can make an interesting character, and if the girl loves him anyway—which is totally possible—then this breakup WILL feel inevitable to him and believable to the reader. But you'll need to set this up beforehand. The fact that he is (once again, maybe) wrecking his chance at happiness because he can't overcome his own personality IS sad. It will be especially sad if the girl finally DOES give up on him. (At least for 'now.') If you work that sort of angle, you can pull this off. But the sadness won't be the breakup itself, it will be his inability to be happy, and to accept that life has its ups and downs, and isn't always perfect. If you engineer a breakup out of the blue, for plot reasons, just so you can get them back together again later on, the whole thing may well feel like a setup. (Or a soap opera.) And it won't be sad at all. It will be annoying. By the way, there is another little trick. Floods of tears, weeping, wailing, breast-beating, etc, doesn't always work when it comes to making a scene feel 'sad.' Sad is often best portrayed very low key. People force themselves to act normally, not to cry—maybe even to pretend they 'don't care' when they obviously do. That way they come across as characters who aren't drama queens. The line between sad and drama queen can be thin indeed.
