I know that, and I don't see where that mistake was made. The only point I mention Tulkan is that he was disemboweled, which is albeit a little bit of an understatement from my reading of your writing. In your section it states " It blinked from position to position, pulling and twisting the maddened form of Tulkan as it strobed this way and that, turning the rabid vepser’s body inside out and then back in on itself again, and again, and again. " I thought this meant that the lurker was literally folding his body inside and out, thus the disemboweling, and that in its destruction of him the creature was taking some control of the flesh,or the madness kept it alive enough to attack Laysmither. I guess I was a little confused there. If i made a mistake, can you please point it out so I can correct. Thank you.
It’s not a big deal. I thought you were referring to Oosh literally cutting Blessi from head to crotch.
I’m probably not going to get this done this week. Fly VERY early Thursday morning. I wasn’t expecting to take on the role of the girl ... have a good opening idea just need to see where I can take it. I think Some Guy will have a tough job. Oh! Did I just have an idea ...?
Back from holiday now. Should get the thing out this week. Delay due to unexpected shift in character and commitment to nano thingy (which I haven’t started yet, and 4 days in already!)
Honestly, maybe I expected a little too much. Next time - if I try again - I’ll make the instructions clearer. I could continue, but I fell like I’ve already made too many concessions and because of this only partially got what I wanted out of the experience. For what it’s worth I was thinking about having the two entities be part of the same creature - so the thing that was in the girl would morph with the creature they were hunting rather jump around different bodies (kind of a mind-body play that would tie into the whole ascension thing and system of the ‘Hunt’ and interplanetary species ascension/godhood). If it panned out I was going to have the girl and Arbiter combine - also a duel bodied creature - and slaughter Laysmither at the end, and/or bring the heritage of the girl into play in another way. The duality would also have played into the whole ‘implant’ business somehow. I’m happy to discuss with those that took part their thoughts and experiences of this exercise. What was learned and/or where they were hoping to take the story etc.,.
I would love to discuss the development of the evolving relationship between the girl and Rocky. It would be great to understand how the dynamics for characters play out in a clearer setting and definition of Implants, lurkers, and technology. Very curious to know what was your overall vision for storyline playing out.
I didn’t have one. I literally just wrote the opening without any idea of where it was going. As I went along the voice of the character became stronger and he was my main tether. I did imagine it as more sci-fi yet in a more ‘primitive’ setting from the get go, but was willing to steer it which ever way other parts took it. I also wanted to build up the role of the Arbiter and have him come in and kill Laysmither off somehow and render the girl as the ‘hero’ of the story. What were you thinking?
The girl as a pivot or nexus point where snap decisions and actions lead to unpredictable outcomes that coalesce into a possible predetermined state with Arbiter, Girl, and Rocky, who is a pass-through character with a higher order of business and purpose. The girl would be considered as both non-threat and ultimate power, subject to the nature and whim of humanity (bi-peds, as it were.) Yeah, Laysmither's ass is toast! Is he wearing a red shirt?
I was also thinking of Oosh as ex-Arbiter having a clash with other Arbiter. His beef being with members of the opposing Hunters too. I don’t know if you’ve ever read Shogun but I was kind of thinking of Oosh in term of that novel - basically throughout the novel you follow some foreigner in Japan and believe the story is about him ... it isn’t. It as fun coming up with weird alien creatures and weapons. I was still trying to figure out who Laysmither was exactly. I had him pegged as partially sociopathic, seemingly pompous yet acutely vicious and unforgiving. I was going to portray his death as an event of curiosity from his perspective - mortality didn’t bother him other than as an item of curiosity. I wouldn’t call him ‘evil’ or ‘good’, just someone out of place and disconnected - hence the ‘sociopathic’ feel.
Hmm. I had no idea of anything other than a bit of the worldbuilding. I chose Waysome Thing because I thought he was left for dead. Lol. Rocky was going to be a transitory character that could appear or leave without affecting the others, but then the girl came along... I saw the Shogun series long ago, so all I remember is the Samurai leader, his daughter, and the English captain.
