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  1. isaac223

    isaac223 Active Member

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    Illegal Actions?

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by isaac223, Dec 20, 2016.

    Following up on my previous thread on a fantasy/psychological thriller/murder mystery idea I had, I was wondering about how to handle "illegal actions." To clarify, a group are sent to an isolated "paradise"-esque environment on a private vacation sanctioned by their mutual employer. Not being known for his kindness towards them at all, the group are initially skeptical, but in the end accept the change. Of course, in time, the killings begin to start, and even though they're first suspicious that the aforementioned employer is the culprit, various clues point towards a completely separate individual...

    I suppose its a relatively basic set-up to a murder mystery -- I'd like to accredit that to the fact its still very much a rough draft. However, my issue is the very last part; I do want the clues pointing towards that person to be a red herring, however at the same time, I don't want it to be a twist as obvious as everything actually being masterminded by the employer. I thought an interesting idea could be deterring the audience away from suspecting who was initially thought to be the murder with them in turn being killed, but I felt it'd be too obvious as well. so my idea in the end was:

    There's only a single human who is a deliberate murderer. However, even if he is the killer, and dies very early on, clearly deliberate deaths still occur. The way I thought to explain this is "illegal actions." These are actions which trigger the person's death and are unique to each individual. My issue is a number of different things:

    How would I go about deciding each person's "illegal action"?
    How would I explain the presence of these "illegal actions"?
    How could there be deaths that're simultaneously caused by an external force of some kind but also paradoxically be the actions of a person in this isolated environment without a conclusion as tacky as "they were being controlled"?
    If characters don't know about the presence of these illegal actions, how would I go about foreshadowing their existence?
    How and why would these exactly be actions that trigger their death?

    I do have a faint idea about how these concepts will attribute to the overarching narrative I have in mind. I, however, merely have an issue with filling out the more finer details and the more absolute conceptualization.
     
  2. antlad

    antlad Banned

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    You could do the old horror movie thing (sinners die, virgin lives). If the boss sets them up, then he knows some of their secrets.
    If you have a 'slut' character, her bed could be fitted with a pressure plate that triggers over certain pounds pressure.

    They would be explained by the boss/whoever setting them up.

    Coincidence. The 'slut' is humping in bed while the alcoholic is down in the wine cellar, both die.

    You could also use 'storm is coming so they won't see drips from a punctured brake line.
     
    Cave Troll likes this.
  3. isaac223

    isaac223 Active Member

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    Oh, I see. I really do like this idea. The only problem is that I intended for some of the fantasy elements to more rear their head in the deaths, in that outside of being controlled, I was trying to find some way for the deaths to simultaneously be caused by some external force but also by someone in the isolated environment. While I would enjoy putting the spin on that old horror movie trope you suggested, I'd like to someone use fantasy elements to explain the paradox in some manner.
     
  4. Cave Troll

    Cave Troll It's Coffee O'clock everywhere. Contributor

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    Location:
    Where cushions are comfy, and straps hold firm.
    There goes another one falling into the Horror cliche pit...:supergrin:

    Well I am sure it was for all the best. But we kinda have to
    put that on your heasdtone when we bury ya. Can't let any
    fall through the cracks. That would just plain be rude and screw
    with the numbers and all that Jazz.

    Probably should stop while I is ahead, because the whole
    shebang goes minorities and sluts die first thing.
    Either kill the lot of em, or the guy that is messing
    with the company in the background. Add a twist
    into the mix, or be a cliche modern Horror writer. :p

    Bonus points awarded if the one(s) getting killed are not
    int the 'College Age', subcategory. :D
     
  5. Cave Troll

    Cave Troll It's Coffee O'clock everywhere. Contributor

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    There goes another one falling into the Horror cliche pit...:supergrin:

    Well I am sure it was for all the best. But we kinda have to
    put that on your heasdtone when we bury ya. Can't let any
    fall through the cracks. That would just plain be rude and screw
    with the numbers and all that Jazz.

    Probably should stop while I is ahead, because the whole
    shebang goes minorities and sluts die first thing.
    Either kill the lot of em, or the guy that is messing
    with the company in the background. Add a twist
    into the mix, or be a cliche modern Horror writer. :p

    Bonus points awarded if the one(s) getting killed are not
    int the 'College Age', subcategory. :D
     
  6. isaac223

    isaac223 Active Member

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    Ouch. I thought his idea of using the context I provided as a means to add a spin on the old cliche was a nice suggestion -- especially since the rest of the overarching narrative, with this included, would provide a story-relevant reason as to why this happens instead of it just happening for the sake of having her be killed for the sake of her being killed.
     
  7. Cave Troll

    Cave Troll It's Coffee O'clock everywhere. Contributor

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    @isaac223
    Don't listen to me. Though I am a big horror buff
    it would almost be a service to breaking down the
    subparr cliche. So go for it and put the idiots on
    their heads, it would be a nice change of pace from
    the old standard.

    Better to break the mold, than simply accept it as cannon. :supersmile:
     
  8. isaac223

    isaac223 Active Member

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    Still trying to fill out the more finer details. Since I need a way to explain the paradox I presented earlier while simultaneously fitting this in the world I planned out (I'm making this a murder mystery spinoff to a planned fantasy series I'm working on to fill in the details of what happened between one point in time and the next, since the series intends to use the effects history can have on later dates and the potential corruption of history as a means of world building, emphasizing this with the contrast between what facts the reader knows happened and the potentially corrupted facts presented to the inhabitants, with one or a few books taking place in one time period, and others in another, with overarching mysteries and novels carrying over and readers knowing more than the characters acting as a means of foreshadowing.
     
  9. antlad

    antlad Banned

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    What type of fantasy is it?
    Could you have an object that has been placed there on purpose because it contains a djinn or something?
     
  10. isaac223

    isaac223 Active Member

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    Supernatural creatures like demons, angels, djinns and stuff do not exist. I have notes for it, but its essentially fantasying various elements of metaphysics and creating a magic system built around it. When I finish refining the notes, I'll drop them in a private message for you to look over, I suppose. How does that sound?
     
  11. isaac223

    isaac223 Active Member

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    Just to make sure... I've been told to be protective of my stuff, even if I don't think its so good, so I'll create it on an un-copiable Google Doc just for some security. I apologize if I come off as distrusting.
     
  12. isaac223

    isaac223 Active Member

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    (DELETED)
     
    Last edited: Dec 21, 2016

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