Thanks to being stuck in the middle of my main WIP, and having an active thought process to just keep writing. I started a Choose Your Own Adventure type story to work on. Though I have a concern about whether the beginning is a bit too vague, or something else. I have never written one before, but I want to keep it open enough that the reader can insert themselves into the story, without them being the stand-in for an already decided upon character for them to control. Beginning bit: You have been considering your options for a good while now. And you have concluded that the best course of action is to find that ‘guy’. You know the one that will be there for you and will be a ton of fun to be with. And hopefully make you feel sexy again. With a steaming cup of coffee in hand you head to the one place you feel you will have the best shot of finding your future hunk of burning love; the internet. But it is a massive place, and you understand that having a bit of patience is going to be key in finding what you seek. Staring blankly at the laptop screen for a short while, sipping from your cup from time to time. Savoring the nutty flavor washing over your tongue as you contemplate how you want to go about finding such a man. The one thing you are sure of is that this new man should be a definite upgrade from that jerk who left you for that 20 something skank, and his pride and joy sports car. Even the thought of them together makes you shudder in disgust and anger. At the present though you have had time to realize you are worth it, and he was just an ass. You giggle at the thought of him getting his just punishment in the form of an STI. Putting your thoughts aside, and your cup of coffee down. Your fingers begin to dance over the keys. The search engine drops a list of suggestions for you. You mull over the 8 or 9 options it has presented you with, and your fingers freeze mid typing. Sorry for this being a bit long, but I am wondering. If you were the reader would this seem a little too vague for a story directed at you the reader? Or do you think that it should be more dictated out with a 'stand-in' character that you direct? Thanks for your thoughts, and opinions. (Be gentle, 2nd POV is not my bread and butter, and this is my first attempt at CYOA style story telling.)
I'd say it's the opposite as far as "you" the character is concerned. You've set "me" up as a straight woman looking to find a hunky dude on the internet. Whether a prospective reader wants to play that role or not is another question, but as it stands the role feels pretty specific. I'm not sure how the CYOA choices develop from here, but if I were reading I would assume that picking dudes from the internet and setting up dates would be first logical fork. I could be wrong about that, but that route looks to be fairly specific as well. Looking at it another way--and this is just an example--having your character sitting down at a computer to look for jobs instead of dates might be more inclusive.
English not being my native language - "At the present though you have had time to realize you are worth it" make it sound like "I'm" worth being cheated on by the jerk. I'm guessing that you mean being worth that hot new guy that I'm totally going to find over the interwebz, but... yeah. Anyway. I've never read a CYOA, have thought to try it at one occasion or the other. I don't think it's vague, it's just not interesting. And it's quite messy. I feel like this would be something that a magazine like Cosmopolitan would have as a give-away during the summer vacation, maybe...
@Homer Potvin I think I see where you are going. Make the dating aspect an option, from something that would be a bit more 'important' and integral to the protag. Then It could divide off depending on the path the reader chooses. Makes sense. Yes I got the lovely bit of advice from Tenderiser, that it would behoove me to write 4 separate stories for gender and sexual preference. Seems a bit easier than trying to throw way too much option wise into one giant lump. @Lemie yeah, this is the rough draft phase of this misadventure. I am sure it will not be so screwed up after editing. Like all stories they all start of rough. That second point of yours is quite amusing. I have never read Cosmo, and I highly doubt they would ever touch anything that is intended for this story with a ten foot pole. Vanilla is not my speed, and it is just for fun anyway.
@Lemie yeah, this is the rough draft phase of this misadventure. I am sure it will not be so screwed up after editing. Like all stories they all start of rough. That second point of yours is quite amusing. I have never read Cosmo, and I highly doubt they would ever touch anything that is intended for this story with a ten foot pole. Vanilla is not my speed, and it is just for fun anyway. [/QUOTE] Yeah, I just never feel good enough to hand around at the workshop, so I guess I just felt a slight triumph to be able to correct someone And Fifty Shades made it, so don't be to sure! Though I'm guessing the character will be able to choose between a doctor, a dentist and a mad scientist in this adventure, yes?
Its all good. The workshop is not so bad. Just takes time to get comfortable with it is all. I had planned on taking a more open approach in this one. Have a bit more diversity when it comes down to the elements within it. Unlike 50 Shades, I have a much better understanding of how BDSM works in a relationship. The plan is for it to be grounded in a more realistic fashion, than in that bit of obscene and offensive dribble. (Mini spoiler I am sure that one of those could show up as an option further in.)
I'm not kinky in the least (at least that's what I tell strangers over the internet), but I'm sure even I'd make BDSM more juste than Fifty Shades. Though, go for it. For fun or for the dollars I've heard you can make out of sexy, sexy writing! Just don't act all surprised when Cosmo calls! And if it's the mad scientist, I'd totally read it
@Lemie Well that is up to you. Anybody could that spent more than 5 minutes on wikipedia. I am not sure how I would feel if Cosmo called me. That I will take under advisory. (But that just means more research, which is something I do enjoy. )
