My name is Reece. I like to read fantasy, and I want to write fantasy. I am here to glean as much as I can and see what I can do to overcome my writing anxiety. Having perused a bit before posting this, thankfully it does not seem all that uncommon. But I find myself having a hard time reading what I have written for fear of cringing with the terribleness of it all. I keep telling myself I do not need to be an author or even a writer. I just need to be a storyteller. I am not trying to output literature. I just want to tell a story that I would want to read. I am far too realistic to be doing this with the intention of eventual monetary gain, but I really do very much hope that someone will read it and truly enjoy it. What do you do with the monkey on your shoulder who is telling you as you type that you suck and no one will want to read what you are writing? I fear that when I finish my WIP, I will be too terrified to ever let anyone read it.
Hi, Reece! Welcome. You're right, there are lots of people who struggle with that. I think one solution is to write mostly for yourself, at least at first? If you can think of the writing itself as being your end goal, it may take some pressure off in terms of worries about "finding an audience".
Absolutely. What @BayView said. Write for yourself. Tell yourself, right now, that NOBODY will see what you've written, until YOU are ready to show it around. Take the pressure off yourself. In fact, if you suffer anxiety, it's a good idea not to let friends, family or colleagues know that you are writing at all. They'll put pressure on you without meaning to ...how's it coming, when will it be done, what's it about, when can I read it ...and my favourite ...when is it going to be published. Just write for yourself, and, as you already said, write what you would like to read. Your goal of 'just being a storyteller' is the best writing goal I can think of. You're putting the story (and its effect on the audience) first. That's your writing authorial ego out of the way entirely. I think you have a great attitude. My one bit of caution. Don't try to go too quickly. Immerse yourself in your story's world via your characters, and let us share what the characters see, feel, think and do. It's a journey. Let us experience that journey, not just read about it afterwards. If that makes sense.
Thanks BayView! The writing really is my end goal. Even if no one ever reads it, I still want to get it out of my head. I'll try to keep this in mind when that self-doubt starts to creep up on me.
Thanks jannert! What you say about going too quickly speaks to me. This is probably the fourth iteration of this same general idea that I have started over the past 10 years or so. I seem to get about 30k words in before I either become completely overwhelmed with doubt or find that I have spat it out so fast, simply for the sake of getting it out there, that I really haven't done my world much justice. I'm currently ~35k into my current WIP, and I am determined to push through. I will keep in mind what you say about the journey. I need to stop settling for ideas that work and really focus on ideas that resonate, and I need to stop worrying about spitting it out so fast. I get these arbitrary time deadlines that I invent myself for no intrinsic purpose other than, it seems, I like to have deadlines.
Keep in mind, too, that story ideas are what get you going, but the book has to be more than just ideas, thrown at us. You have to bring the ideas to life, and that takes some slowing down. I'm just reading an EXCELLENT book right now, about constructing a story. It's called Beginnings, Middles and Ends, by Nancy Kress. It's been on my shelf a while, and I've only just been dipping into it. Now I'm reading it from cover to cover, and underlining like mad. She says lots about how to get a story written, admits to becoming 'stuck' in the middle of five of her six published novels, goes into why getting stuck happens and how to identify and overcome the problems, etc. Her focus is on how to get the story to work, and how to break the process down so it doesn't seem overwhelming.
I think that I am doing okay so far in terms of animating my ideas, but the writing itself is going to need several polishings, and the story likely several tweakings to un-suck itself, but I am not feeling entirely dismal and dejected about the whole thing, which is a positive. I will look into this excellent book! I can use all the help I can get. Thank you
