Hey everyone o/ I wasnt sure if this was the right section, my apologies if this should be posted elsewhere. I have a friend who has just started writing, she is fairly young and has recently gone through something traumatic in her life. Writing seems to help her deal with things so i am trying my best to encourage her to continue however i have no experience in writing, i wasn't even that good at literature in school. She has just finished the first part of the book and asked me to take a look at it. So far the best i could say is that it was good, i feel unable to give her any constructive feedback. The best i can do is help with minor grammatical errors. That is what brings me here, i am looking for people who will actually be able to help and i could give something small in the way of compensation for their time. I see already that there is a workshop here with guides, i will direct her to the resources located on this website. Im not really sure what else i can do to help, is it possible to find some kind of instructor? someone with experience in writing who would be able to read over what she has done and give useful feedback. I figured this is a good place to ask she may even decide to interact with the community here after i direct her to this forum but for now im letting her get on with the writing and looking to support her any way i can. What resources would be good to link her to, i see many people on here are writing their own books what resources do you use to help? Well anyway, any help would be appreciated, shes a good kid and doesnt deserve to have to go through what she is going through, i feel compelled to assist her.
1. If she is good and you are not, then: Don't take any kind of upper position. If she is better in writing than you, you should respect that situation no matter if you are superior in some other way. 2. Give her emotional room to write. 3. Give her intellectual room to write. 4. Give her creative room to write. 5. She is the expert of her own situation. Ask her what she wants, what she needs, how she feels about different things... If you try to help without listening very carefully, there is a very big risk that you harm her, her writing an/or her text. 6. There is a lot of good books about writing. If she can't afford them and you can, you can always tell her that you are ready to help her get them. 7. If someone really is good in writing, then his/her thinking is probably much more multidimentional than others notice. Respect it. These people live in a world of very complex abstractions. Don't go there unless invited. And if invited - remember that you are a quest, not a landlord. 8. "Write what you know" means "write what you know emotionally". If she is doing that, then respect her expertise. In "traumawriting" the most important thing is the process of writing - not the text. If you disturb the process in order to get text better, you might disturb her entire life. And... Before you believe anything I said, you maybe should do this: Print this. Let her read it. Ask if she agrees. If she does not agree with something, think that something as bullshit. If she does, think it as very high level of knowledge. Don't believe or disbelieve me but her. She knows more about her life and writing than anyone here. She could find some peer support, peer interaction, beta readers, workshops, progress support... here. If she wants that, she is welcome here.
Thank you kindly for your reply, it is very insightful. Im certainly not looking to assume a superior role, dont worry about that! I have told her that i have no experience in writing and so cant really help her improve by giving advice on writing. All i have to offer her in this regard is my own time researching possible avenues where she can get support from people with experience. Could you perhaps elaborate on what it means to give her emotional, intellectual and creative room to write? My apologies if this is a newbie question. After i told her the work was good i also told her about my lack of experience in writing, she said she could do with people to proof read it for grammatical errors which i can do to a small degree, i then offered to search around for a bit to find someone with experience and she very much welcomed the idea, she said she would love someone to give her feedback. Thats what brought me here I like the idea about books on writing! i will ask her what she thinks about this, i can purchase them if needs be. I definitely respect her intelligence, shes smarter than me when it comes to writing thats for sure! I will always be a guest in her world never a landlord Its interesting what you say about traumawriting, it makes sense to me that the most helpful thing for her would be the process. She is seeking to improve on her own i am not encouraging or discouraging this, she is worried about her work being "garbage" as she puts it! Perhaps with a book or two and some of her own correspondence with this forum she will have the confidence to continue, though she seems to be doing quite well so far perhaps she doesnt need it! she seems pretty dedicated. I will let her know what kind of support she may find here. Thank you for your time and thoughtful reply.
1. This is hard. "Emotional, intellectual and creative room..." it is something so self-evident that I can't explain it. Ask her if she needs those. If she does, she'll tell you what she needs. If not, you don't need to worry about this. 2. I have read about 4 books about writing, thinking and things connected to them in less than a year. (Reading for fun is not in this number.) It has given me a lot. There is also a lot of good video lecture material in Youtube. For instance Brandon Sanderson lecture series. This... ...is 12 lectures. I have found combination of reading and tubing good for me. 3. Writing is thinking and feeling in a way that organises both cognitive and emotional part of us. It is good way to process things. 4. Some of us do that and need that. I'm a "my way or no way" -person myself so that it is easy to understand that need. If she seeks to improve/process/grow/heal on her own, then we others just respect that. If and when she is ready to share her inner world, she'll do that. She sets timetables, agendas and expectations.
