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  1. SkullCap

    SkullCap New Member

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    KaijuMonsterVirus V.S GoopyChemicalFallout

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by SkullCap, Jan 9, 2017.

    I wanted to ask a few questions concerning the basic setting of my work to you.

    *(Reference paragraph: This work of fiction takes place in the aftermath of an apocalyptic event that wiped out 90% of the Human race. The time of this plot would be taking place approximately 300 years after the event. Large corporations who placed investments into their survival also kept a wide range of technological advancements in their protected storage. After the event, surviving companies banded their resources together in order to make a super-city with massive amounts of technology. A Utopian world was born as the heart of humanity, while outside the city walls; not is all as it is told within.)

    My story features a group of entities called the Corrupted, who are infected with some sort of ailment that rewrites their DNA. The whole purpose of this concept is to counter a more robotic-parasite ailment known as Machina. After an entity is infected by the ailment, it begins to morph into a green fleshy creature.

    We are focusing on the origins of this ailment.

    Originally, the ailment derived from a massive creature in the shape of an island in earths ocean. The ailment was a virus that was introduced to the city by a silent carrier. This silent carrier may be a main character(There will be multiple).

    I got to revising and came up with an alternate rout to this origin. In this version, the massive creature and main character from the last version are completely scrapped. This time around the ailment is a radiation created by the apocalyptic event. The Radiation emanates from a green sludge, of which origins I haven't decided on. Possibilities for the origins currently consist of Chemical war fallout and natural mutation of viral cells.

    I was hoping I could get some feedback from you, and so I have a few questions to consider.

    -Is the original plot better than the revised plot?
    -In the case of plot #2, would it make sense to use a virus, or is it better to use war fallout as the origins
    -Do you have any criticism with the concepts I have used so far?
    -What might I do to make this plot flow more efficiently in a comprehensible way
     
  2. Seren

    Seren Writeaholic

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    Right, I don't have much knowledge about science or sci-fi, but I'll help out with what I can. If we're talking about literal radiation from nuclear warfare, doesn't that have a set list of symptoms/illnesses that it can cause? So if you want to add an effect to it that's made up, you need to make up a certain chemical or modify something further back in the process, like a new nuclear bomb or something along those lines. Your characters shouldn't turn into "green fleshy creatures" from radiation unless there is a cause for it. If the green sludge is supposed to be the cause, then THAT needs to have a cause, too. Because as far as I'm aware, radiation does not cause the production of green sludge that mutates our cells in such a way that means we might turn into these creatures.

    Having said that, I think your second plot idea is better - perhaps because I don't fully understand the first. It seems a little far-fetched to me.

    Introducing a made-up virus will probably be easier for you than getting behind the science of why the radiation would cause the effects you want, but it's up to you. Both have been done many, many times before, although that doesn't mean you can't do them brilliantly. I've used the idea of viruses in apocalyptic stories before.

    As I don't know the proper plot, I can't give much advice on how to make it flow. To help you plan it out, however, you could look up the eight-point arc to get you started on what events will happen, and then write the numbers 1 to 20 down on a large piece of paper and try to fill in each one with a different event so that you have a map of the incidences that lead you from start to finish.

    I hope I helped. :)
     
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  3. SkullCap

    SkullCap New Member

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    @Seren Thank you so much for your time. You have given me great feedback. I will be working on some revisions with your advice.
     
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  4. Seren

    Seren Writeaholic

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    It's no problem. :)
     
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  5. watermark

    watermark Member

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    I think this is a question of whether you want your story to be Superhero-fantastical scifi vs hardcore scifi. When you said "Green fleshy creature" it kinda put it in the first category for me. So your first ending would fit more with that. Your second plot is more traditional and hardcore sci-fi. It's believable and realistic, and has more of a modern thriller feel.

    I personally like the first one, although it's more wacky. :p

    Imho, there's nothing wrong with over the top scifi. Take for example, the movie Pacific Rim. We know logically it's totally stupid to make big robots to combat outer space monsters when simple missiles would do a much more efficient job, but it's so much fun watching it.

    And we can always make fun of Star Wars. Yeah, you should totally ditch all that fancy, high tech technology and should instead talk to ghosts and rely on some mystical, unseen force to solve your problems. And you should block laser beams with medieval swordplay. Again, it doesn't make logical sense, but so much fun.

    One last thing, your story kinda reminds me of that vampire virus show The Strain.

    So it really depends on what kind of story you want to tell.
     

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