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  1. jakeybum

    jakeybum Active Member

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    My edits look okay?

    Discussion in 'Word Mechanics' started by jakeybum, Jun 12, 2017.

    a 2%–7% annual savings

    an industry with annual revenues of $150 million–$200 million

    I think my edits above (for a business report) are much better than the originals below. Do you agree?

    a 2%- to 7%-per-year savings

    a $150 million- to $200 million-a-year industry

    Thank you.
     
    Seven Crowns likes this.
  2. big soft moose

    big soft moose All killer, no filler. Contributor Community Volunteer

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    in the first line if its ' a'... it's singular so either

    "a 2%-7% saving," or "2%-7% savings"
     
  3. Komposten

    Komposten Insanitary pile of rotten fruit Staff Supporter Contributor

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    Both are easier to read the way you've written them. Your version of the second one might sound a little less compact and formal, but I still think it is better.

    Also, I would probably clean it up a little further and write:
    2-7 % annual savings
    annual savings of 2-7 %​
    and
    an industry with annual revenues of $150-$200 million
    an industry with revenues of $150-$200 million annually​
     
  4. jakeybum

    jakeybum Active Member

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    I'm thinking that $150–$200 million could cause a momentary miscue; the reader may interpret $150 as one hundred fifty dollars, even if for a millisecond.

    I think the en-dash signals true fastidiousness. Lol.
     
    Last edited: Jun 12, 2017
  5. jakeybum

    jakeybum Active Member

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    Thanks, everyone—appreciated.
     
  6. Seven Crowns

    Seven Crowns Member Supporter

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    I'm impressed you used the en dash, which is correct for ranges. I think you nailed it.

    -dash
    –en dash
    —em dash

    Dash envy . . .
     
  7. jakeybum

    jakeybum Active Member

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    Thank you, Seven Crowns.
     

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