1. Andrew Brannan

    Andrew Brannan New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2016
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0

    need help getting the feel for the setting

    Discussion in 'Setting Development' started by Andrew Brannan, Dec 23, 2016.

    my story is set in modern time but with a twist I have the idea of how it would feel to be in my characters shoes, would like some advice about how I could get my readers to feel the same
     
  2. SethLoki

    SethLoki Retired Autodidact Contributor

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2011
    Messages:
    1,412
    Likes Received:
    1,492
    Location:
    Manchester UK
    Hello Andrew,
    are you writing your story in 1st person? Get that right (ie come in close and bring your reader with you) and you're most of the way there.
     
  3. Andrew Brannan

    Andrew Brannan New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2016
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    ye in 1st person any tips you can offer to get it right?
     
  4. MrIntensity

    MrIntensity Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2016
    Messages:
    71
    Likes Received:
    18
    Location:
    UK
    being relatable is the best and easiest method, the character should think and behave like any other normal pleb. However if you don't want them to be normal you must make them authentic and un-apologetic to their situation and mannerisms, because personally it would be a big turn off for me on any book that has somebody conquered by love or become good out of their own loving volition. Basically avoid cliches and authenticity is key regardless of the characters moral compass.
     
    pitviper likes this.
  5. jannert

    jannert Who? Whooo? Staff Supporter Contributor

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2013
    Messages:
    17,271
    Likes Received:
    19,010
    Location:
    Scotland
    If you're using first person POV, use it to its fullest extent.

    Don't just relate what your character does. I did this, then that, and waited for a few minutes and did something else. You're inside that character's head. In a sense, that person is telling the story directly to the reader. So make the character's thought process during the story VERY clear.

    He was sitting slumped in the soft armchair beside the bay window, staring at his folded hands. I wasn't sure if he'd seen me come in, so I said his name, but he didn't respond. Did he just want me to go away? I spoke his name again, and he turned his head to stare out the window. I went silent myself, heart pounding, waiting to see what he would do next. Had I crossed some line that couldn't be crossed back? He didn't move, so I finally said his name one more time. "Terry?" This time he did look at me. For a few seconds I felt only relief, then I realised his face was streaked with tears.


    The bits in black could stand alone, but I feel the bits in blue add another dimension of understanding to the reader as to what is going on. I know some writers like the unadorned style that doesn't give anything much away. However, I don't. I like the immersion that a first person POV character can give. Why use first person if you want to keep your readers at a distance? This isn't gospel, it's just my own slant on the subject.

    If you make the reader guess why the character does something, then you'll create distance between them and your reader. A first person POV gives you the tool to make your reader experience everything first hand. Including the character's thoughts and feelings as events unfold. Don't skimp on that aspect of the storytelling, and you should be fine.
     
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2016
    Elven Candy and Cave Troll like this.
  6. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

    Joined:
    May 1, 2008
    Messages:
    23,742
    Likes Received:
    20,539
    Location:
    El Tembloroso Caribe
    2p.png

    It's not a POV video game. Don't engage the story as though you are marionetting the character through every action, every lift of a finger, every exhalation. You don't do that in real life. Literally, you don't.

    Remember to observe the world around you. And for pity's sake, remember that you don't have to literally see, hear, feel, smell, think, notice everything. Those are filter verbs that, in the case of 1st person, attach more marionette strings to the POV character's senses that you then manipulate and the sum total becomes that amateurish 1st person pov sound everyone wants to avoid.

    I awoke and smelled bacon so I got up to run downstairs to be sure to get my share. I hoped there would be pancakes with syrup as well.

    vs.

    There was bacon cooking. Rub one out or bacon? Stupid question. Bacon, of course. Shirt? The only person who could be cooking in the house was my gay roommate Tommy and I was in way better shape than him, so fuck that shirt. He could look at my abs all he liked, the little perv, as long as there was bacon. Shit, if there's pancakes with syrup, today just might be his lucky day.
     
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2016
  7. Caveriver

    Caveriver Active Member

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2016
    Messages:
    182
    Likes Received:
    83
    Location:
    Missouri
    Lol. Now I want to read this.
     
    Cave Troll and Wreybies like this.
  8. Cave Troll

    Cave Troll Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2015
    Messages:
    17,383
    Likes Received:
    26,224
    Location:
    Where cushions are comfy, and straps hold firm.
    @Wreybies :superlaugh:
     
  9. Wreybies

    Wreybies Thrice Retired Supporter Contributor

    Joined:
    May 1, 2008
    Messages:
    23,742
    Likes Received:
    20,539
    Location:
    El Tembloroso Caribe
    Hahaha :rofl: What is it about bacon that makes us think about sex at the same time. :whistle: :-D
     
    Cave Troll likes this.
  10. Cave Troll

    Cave Troll Contributor Contributor

    Joined:
    Aug 8, 2015
    Messages:
    17,383
    Likes Received:
    26,224
    Location:
    Where cushions are comfy, and straps hold firm.
    @Wreybies they both bring pleasure in our lives? :supergrin:
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice