1. Tingeling

    Tingeling New Member

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    Need some help

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by Tingeling, Aug 24, 2008.

    It feeles like I'm going nowhere and I would really need a kick forward. I've been working with this story for a long time. It's an epic story and I suppose it's a fantasy story. It takes place in our world, in our time. The most fantasy stories like that are often in USA or in England. I've never been in either of those countries, I've only been in Europe and I wanted to know the place the story is in so I took my country - Sweden. My main character lives in Stockholm, the capital. Her name is Alice, she's about fifteen to sixteen years old and to put it plain and simple - she's mean, spoiled and selfish. She lives with her aunt Bellona, called Bella, in a huge flat. Besides the flat they have a mansion in the archipelago. They belong to the world "inside" of our world. It's a world whose heart is three golden cities that are situated in diffrent places in our world. One is in north Brasilia, another one is in Italy and the "capital" is in the middle of the Atlantic. It's a world with magical creatures like unicorns, vampires, shapeshifters, sirens and well you get it. There are little villages all over the world with people who belong to this hidden world. It's a little bit simliar to the world in Harry Potter apart from that they're not wizards or witches. They are just as much magical as we, they just belong to another world with more knowledge about things we only see as legends and stories for children. These people take the subway in our world, they buy clothes and food in our shops so they melt in really. Alice and Bella are two of these "melting in" people. One thing I'm still working is why they have their world in secret, why they don't "come out" from the shadows. Any suggestions there? Okay, so to the plot now. The people in this world have known for centuries about that there is a thing in the universe that we would magic. Since I'm writing the story in swedish I'm not really sure
    how translate the word I use for what the people call this magic. I use the word "mystik" which in a way means mystery in swedish. Anyway this force is a bit like air. It's everywhere and it's invisible. Now suddenly there are people who gets power from this force. It's is like a new kind, very close to humans, have been created. I call them "mystiker" and they have powers that comes from within. They don't need a wand or something, most of them just use their eyes or their hands. None of these peoples powers are simliar to somebodyelses power. One power is unique. The diffrence between "mystiker" and humans are that "mystiker" lives a hundred to twohundred years more and the colour of their eyes are much more clearer than humans. And they don't just need food to survive they need something else. I really need some help here. I want humans to look at "mystiker" as something horrible and unnatural. I have been thinking they could drink blood, so that they are kind of vampire like magicians but I'm not really up to that idea. I don't what to be another vampire writer.
    I would like something else... Any ideas?
    So basiclly I need help with two things:
    1. Any ideas on why they live in secret? Why don't reveal their hidden world?
    2. Any suggestions to what the magical people could feed on besides food?
     
  2. Ungood

    Ungood New Member

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    The simple answer is that "Humans would ruin everything"

    What is wrong with food?
     
  3. Daisy

    Daisy New Member

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    Umm... if it doesn't have to be physical feeding, maybe they feed on wars and strife and bad feelings and engender to promote it in our world.

    Or youth or health or beauty... sucking it out of humans. Or the power of the sun or the moon... stealing our light...

    If physical, could be anything besides blood... hearts would be really disgusting and hateful, human skin, animals, crops, oil supplies, anything that the reader would find deplorable or that might throw our world into chaos.

    Sounds like a really good story BTW.:)
     
  4. Cogito

    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    A story concept means nothing. I can tell you now, it has been done before. What matters is how you write it, the characterization, the flow, the imagery, all of it.

    There's no point to asking what other people think of the concept! They'll either say,"Sounds great," or, "it sounds like a ripoff of..."

    If the idea stirs you, write it. Then ask people what they think of the final story. After they tell you what they don't like about it, revise it, usually several times, until you're happy with it or until you throw up your hands and say the hell with it.

    Please read this thread about What is Plot Creation and Development?

    (and yes, this is a template post, which should give you an idea of how often this comes up.)

    So make your best decision based on how you would most prefer to write it, and then put in your best efforts/

    What other people would choose to read, based on a sketch of a storyline, is irrelevant.
     
  5. ZionsRodeVos

    ZionsRodeVos New Member

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    The mystiker could feed on thoughts or memories and if it were memories you could use it to explain human forgetfulness. And of course if the humans knew they existed and that they were the reason they were always forgetting something they would definitely want to get rid of them so that they wouldn't forget anymore.
     
  6. Marcelo

    Marcelo Member

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    Cogito... Do you have that lecture saved in your PC or something? I hadn't noticed that it was always the same! :rolleyes:
     
  7. Leo

    Leo New Member

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    It is kind of annoying that you can't even be bothered to write an original response...

    I mean, you use it on everyone (I'm sure you'll use it on me someday) so it doesn't really mean much, does it? People aren't going to pay attention to things like "it has been done before" if they know you always say the exact same thing.

    And this person is asking very specific questions about her plot, in the "Plot Creation" forum, and is in no way asking you what you think of the concept.

    I'm sorry if this sounds like a rant, I don't mean it to.

    Anyway, I like the idea of feeding on memories. Or perhaps something like goodwill, or positive emotions. Or maybe something precious, like gold or money, so they always have to steal. Or perhaps objects of sentimental value, so they're always stealing people's most prized possessions, like wedding rings, photos of dead loved ones, etc. That could make things very interesting, because people can have sentimental value in pretty much anything.

    And if they come out of hiding, they know people will deprive them of this special "food", which they need to live.
     
  8. Cogito

    Cogito Former Mod, Retired Supporter Contributor

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    Marcelo, Leo, did you notice the line that says:
    There are reasons I made this a template post, and apply it whenever I see one of these threads.

    1. I feel it is an important point that needs to be made about this type of post.
    2. It is not what this forum on the site is for. It is not a place to slip in mini-review requests, especially on something not sufficiently developed to review.
    3. Although the post is repatitive to you, most of these threads are by people new to the site.

    Please nothe that the last couple of lines are specific to this person's questions. The direction to take aq story should be from the author, not from an opinion poll. The poster is not at a roadblock, she is having trouble deciding which of her owenb alternatives to follow. That decision really must come from her.
     
  9. Rapture

    Rapture New Member

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    Just a tad bit off topic guys, private messages would be a much better place to have this conversation as i am sure Tingeling doesn't want her (I'm assuming girl since everyone has been referring to her as such o_O) thread turn into a flame fest. If I sound uppity feel free to make jokes and snicker behind my back, I can take it! /flex

    As for Tingel's question, I get the feeling that you want your magical people to be misjudged. hated by humanity because of what they have to do to survive, but really not that bad of characters. I liked the idea of taking personal possessions of peoples, feeding off the good memories that are tied to it. Still it kind of gives me the feeling that they are doing something wicked by stealing those memories (hey maybe it works then =D). Perhaps they feed on something even more abstract, they feed off of dreams. A person coming into my bedroom at night to siphon energies away from my dreams does sound pretty scary but not exactly threatening.

    As to why they wish to remain hidden, again someone else pointed it out long before I did. Humanity has a tendency to destroy anything they are afraid of, and if we knew about these people sucking away at our dreams (or what have you) its more then likely we'd try and kill them.

    Or perhaps our knowledge of them would destroy what they feed off of, not exactly sure how that would work but it sounds interesting at least. Hope I haven't made to much of an ass' of myself =)
     
  10. tehuti88

    tehuti88 New Member

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    Aside from humanity possibly fearing the people from the inner world (in olden times they might have considered them witches, even if they practiced no magic), there's the all-too-common tendency to want to exploit new lands. Think of when various European cultures first set out for America. They were in search of all sorts of riches that in many cases turned out to not even be there, but that didn't stop the stories from spreading. What if some sort of rumor started that there is untold wealth in this inner world? That would certainly draw people toward it. In past times maybe people would have sought gold and furs; maybe today they'd even be seeking oil! This would be a good reason to keep it and its inhabitants secret.

    Regarding what these other people feed on, to make outer-world people fear them it should be something that would alarm us. Some good suggestions have been given, though sucking on people's good thoughts and life essence or what-have-you seems kind of overdone, shades of the Specters in the "His Dark Materials" books. Maybe they could also feed on something more physical, a scarce resource that humans need--the ozone layer, or oil maybe. *LOL*

    (I see someone actually mentioned oil supplies already so I'm not alone in believing this would throw humans into a panic! :D )
     
  11. Tingeling

    Tingeling New Member

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    thanks for all ideas, you've given me a lot of inspiration. And yes, by the way I'm a girl ^^
     

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