These are the basic traits of the five main/central characters of my semi-novel. Any critique would be greatly appreciated. Bear in mind that these are just the very basic traits of their being (introduced within the prologue and first chapter) and do not represent them as a whole. David: David Addison Born November 5, 1970 (mid-thirties) in North Carolina Lived in California and then New York, has lived in other places as well. In love with Caroline Everett Haint, a married woman Came to Mecklenburg looking for work before traveling on to the next town. Decided to live there after the quarry broke and needed to be repaired because the railway lines were destroyed. Current employment is as crew supervisor for the quarry rebuild, and then later as a crew supervisor for Nicholson Construction. A writer by choice. Lives in a newish apartment complex Frequents the diner that Caroline is a waitress at. Disliked by Alderman Eventually marries Percy, Caroline’s sister Has two dead daughters, Jill and Becky. Caroline: Caroline Everett Haint Has lived in Mecklenburg her whole life Married to Alderman Haint, an auto parts store owner A waitress at a diner, though Alderman doesn’t want her working. Comes from a rich family who lost money in a stock market crash Had a miscarriage a ‘couple of months ago’, and she and Alderman have been trying to have a baby since then. They see a doctor in Charlotte for ‘woman troubles’. Has one sister, Percy Everett. Lives in a house on a hill. It is unclear if she shares David’s feelings, or is just naturally flirty. Has dark hair. Named for her grandmother. Older than Percy. Dislikes Rose. Has a warm, friendly smile. Percy: Percy Everett. Has lived in Mecklenburg her whole life Younger than Caroline. Named for her grandfather. Works at the diner when Caroline is in Charlotte. Dislikes Rose. Visits Alderman and Caroline every Sunday for supper. Also has dark hair. Has a smile that is similar to Caroline’s in some way. Has two dead daughters, Becky and Jill Alderman: Alderman Haint. Has lived in Mecklenburg his whole life and has never left. Dislikes outsiders Forty-six years old. Owns an auto parts store. Loves Caroline with his ‘whole heart’. Helps on projects such as the quarry and David’s apartment building. Dislikes David because of the way he looks at Caroline. Thinks Rose is a “vicious bitch” due to an incident they had when they were children. His father, Jeffrey, was a drunk. His family was somewhat looked down on by the residents of Mecklenburg, but he worked his way up to the ‘top’ of the social ladder, presumably by marrying Caroline. Was named because his father thought the only way a Haint could be an alderman was if that was his name. Rose: Rose Connors Her family is from Raleigh, she has lived in Mecklenburg since she was six years old. A nosy gossip, presumably cannot keep out of other people’s business. Universally disliked by the populace of Mecklenburg, but especially by Alderman, Caroline, and Percy. Has red hair, is short and plump A cook at the diner where Percy and Caroline work (presumably a good one, although she is ‘useless in every other aspect of her life’) Thank you.
First, I will point you to a similar recent thread. Basically, I don't believe in creating character profiles, because of their tendency to box you in. However, a couple ofyour profiles are based more on defining events than on descriptive generalizations, leaving more freedom for growth. Still, there are several constraining or oversimplifying comments (disliked by Alderman, dislikes Rose, dislikes outsiders) that may flatten their development if you hold to them too tightly. Is Rose simply vindictive, or is her gossipping an attempt to reach out for friendship? In order to gossip, someone must be listening as well - do some of the other characters resent her when she talks about them, but listen eagerly if it's about someone else? The likes and dislikes become a lot more comples, more human, if you ask yourself these questions. Here's another link, to a post that sums it up quite succinctly
These aren't complete character profiles--they're just the traits they possessed by the prologue and first chapter of the story, in hopes that I could develop them into being more 3-dimensional while still not turning them into whole different people by 100 pages in without cause. I've never done character profiles before or since, because they don't leave any room for change. But this isn't a character profile so much as a regroup of their traits and i thought it would be helpful to go alongside my other thread.
I'm not sure that I like character profiles or not. These seem a bit too vague and general - but that might actually be a good thing. I know they're not completed ones, but I don't see anything that makes them stand out (I suppose the genre would make this more or less important). Personally, I like to concentrate less on history (who knowns who, what they do) but more on who they are. What are their morals and ambitions. Just my thoughts on the issue.
@johnnyhopkins34 This thread is from 2008. Why in the world would you resurrect it? Hell, OP's last post on this forum was in April of 2008, so she's obviously not going to read it.
