Some feedback on my novel outline if you will. I'm good with criticism so go for it, I'm really trying to plan this one nicely. Edit: refined the outline a little more. Still a rough outline, but the story flows more nicely IMO. Again, critique please! SERENITY BLUE (Outline) I.Exposition 1.Welcome to Serenity City The city of Serenity is a dark, brooding place, where the police track down and kill elementals. 2.SinCon, the special tactical unit of Serenity The mercernaries of SinCon are elementals, but they are called in on assignments that the police refuse to handle. Holly Whims, the “negotiator” keeps their records tied up and their asses covered. 3.Meet Ezra and his brother, and the infamous Shades Ezra and Issac are elemental brothers. Ezra can control fire, and Issac can control electricity. Shades is much older and more experienced in his powers, and he has a dream of becoming the “night”. To be majestic and all-consuming. 4.Divix, the center of fear The boys at Divix research facility are looking for the next big thing in elemental destruction. They may just have found it in element “s”, affectionately named “Serenity blue.” II. Rising Action 1.The Grapevine The boys at SinCon are a little jealous and want to know what Divix has under wraps. What is all of this about an “element 'S'” anyways? 2.Mission Impossible The mercernaries are sent into Divix to take a sample of the element for SinCon's research team. Shades comes, or rather, doesn't come, in contact with the element and forms his own ideas. 3.Possibilities What would you do if you could have everything you ever wanted? Shades decides that Issac is his key to manipulating the element. 4.Journey into the belly of the beast, again Shades sneaks Issac back out to the research facility to turn himself into darkness. Issac sees Shades in full power and is convinced to join him and use the element on himself to go fully electrical and become stronger than his brother. 1.Where's Issac? Ezra goes to the Divix building to find his brother, only to realize that Issac has become a full elemental, and completely insane. III. Climax 1. Balance of Powers Issac blames Ezra for being so weak and challenges Ezra's ideas with Shades'. He wants to stay elemental. Ezra tries to calm him down, and Issac attacks. 2.Electrifying The brothers face off, and Issac overpowers Ezra fully. Ezra manages to incapacitate his brother long enough to expose himself to the element himself. 3.Showdown Issac and Ezra face off in elemental form as Shades slips away. Holly comes rushing to the Divix research building with back-up to stop the two. Ezra trys to show Issac who he really is when Issac overloads and the building comes crashing down. IV.Falling Action 1.Enough is enough! Issac drags himself out of the rubble only to discover that Holly is dead, having been crushed by the falling debri. Issac realizes he's dangerous and decides it would be better to get himself under control. V.Resolution 1.Goodbye, Brother Issac decides he would be better off trying to control himself in the stormy clouds that float above Serenity City. Ezra decides to go after Shades and plot his revenge. With the SinCon building in dissaray, he takes to the streets on his own.
