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  1. Lone_Wolf

    Lone_Wolf Banned

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    Quick question about absent parents

    Discussion in 'Character Development' started by Lone_Wolf, Oct 31, 2017.

    I'm trying to write a story that's inspired by true events, and I'm kind of stuck on how I can make my two main characters interact without meeting each other's parents. The two persons in reality have never met each other's parents at all, so it feels rather weird to me to have the characters interact with them in the story. The deuteragonist's parents are busy with their careers; one of them is a nurse and works about twelve hours almost everyday. The other works the late night shift at a phone company and sometimes fixes computers during the day. The protagonist's parents, I am unsure. One parent also works during the late night and comes home at noon; the other parent works till late noon and sometimes goes on business trips.

    I'm not sure what else I can do to make both set of parents frequently absent so the two main characters can interact in either house. These characters go to school, so there's that. I'm trying to pan out a scene where the main characters and two mutual friends interact without the parents, but it's hard, since this scene is supposed to take place at the protagonist's house in the evening time. It seems a bit unrealistic to have the parents constantly go on business trips or fix on electronics whenever both main characters interact in whichever's house. Does anyone else have other ideas how I can make the parents be away at home?
     
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  2. ChickenFreak

    ChickenFreak Contributor Contributor

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    Why would it be bad for the characters to meet each other's parents? It sounds like you may be working harder to prevent it than it's worth.
     
  3. Shenanigator

    Shenanigator Has the Vocabulary of a Well-Educated Sailor. Contributor

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    If the parents are constantly working, not difficult at all. My parents both worked nights (11PM-7AM shift) when I was in high school, so my friends never saw them. They got home just as I was leaving for school and went to sleep around 8 or 8:30 AM. My mom's best friend lived across the street, so no other supervision.

    ETA: In thinking about this, I don't recall ever seeing any of my friend's parents at their houses after school, either. Everyone worked. I met my friend Todd's mom once, and she was a single parent. So if you're looking for ways to give your characters opportunities to get together or get into trouble or both, there are plenty of them, believe me.

    ETA: Just be sure if the parents work night shift, to remember that the kids have to keep the house quiet during the day. I couldn't play music until 10PM at night.
     
    Last edited: Oct 31, 2017
  4. The Dapper Hooligan

    The Dapper Hooligan (V) ( ;,,;) (v) Contributor

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    The parents could also do shift work, be on call, have long commutes, do book club, be taking night classes, be sequestering themselves for hours at a time trying to write a book, etc.
     
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  5. Shenanigator

    Shenanigator Has the Vocabulary of a Well-Educated Sailor. Contributor

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    "Be sequestering themselves for hours at a time trying to write a book"

    @The Dapper Hooligan Oh, come now, who would do that? Let's keep it real, people. o_O :D

    (Edited because the quote came out wrong the first time)
     
    Last edited: Oct 31, 2017
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  6. Lone_Wolf

    Lone_Wolf Banned

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    Like I said, the actual persons have never met each other's parents. At all. I can't see it happening, since I personally don't find it fitting if they did in the story, and I have no idea how to even make it work
     
  7. The Dapper Hooligan

    The Dapper Hooligan (V) ( ;,,;) (v) Contributor

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    I've had some friends for years that my parents have never met. It basically involves hanging out at some place that isn't where your parents are. My friends and I used to go to the beach and the theater and stuff like that and only went to any of our homes when our family weren't there because none of us really wanted to meet and hang out with each others parents. Also, my place was like half an hour out of town, so no one really wanted to make the drive if they didn't have to.
     
  8. LostThePlot

    LostThePlot Naysmith Contributor

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    Parents don't have to be literally absent to not be in the narrative.

    What I did in my last book, where the girl was pretending to have cancer and managed to keep that a secret, was to make her mother exhausted all the time. She was working two jobs to pay for the house post-divorce and while she was trying hard to be the best mum she could, she was just ground down and tired and when she was at home she was either asleep or too tired to ask difficult questions. If Beth says she's going out, her mum isn't going to ask. If Beth brings her boyfriend back then her mum think "Well, at least they can't get up to too much trouble" and left them to it so she could sleep and unwind a bit.

    Yes, it may be hard to set up a two parent family to be exactly like that but it's not so hard to come up with a situation that would suck up all (or at least most) of the parents time. For example; one of the parents could be working two jobs, while the other works and has a disabled family member that they help to look after. They could have serious financial problems from medical bills or a court case that they both are working to pay off, as well as having fall out from that to deal with as well. Their marriage could be on the rocks and one of them works late a lot because they don't want to come home and get shouted at but they stay together for the kids. The main character could have a sick younger sibling that the parents have no choice but to pay most of their attention to. In all of these situations; if the protagonist is a smart kid who can be independent they can look after themselves. The parents won't like that they can't be there but they will have a reason to do it. Or, you can come join the dark side (I make awesome cookies ;)) and make one of the parents abusive or drunk and the kids deliberately avoid them; thus the only time they can be in the house is when they know it's safe (yes, that's from one of my books too).

    I think this is a better idea than having the parents around to interact with; if the parents aren't doing anything for the story then they don't need to be there. And having this sad thing hovering over the house will give it the sheen of reality much more so than successful but very busy parents. The sense that the parents can't be there is better than the parents care about work than the kids. And this gives you something that you can play off, or not, with the kids, depending on the plot and how it works.

    It's good to play off of real events but you aren't writing a biography. You're writing fiction and you need to write whatever makes the best story. Having a little strand of plot that has the parents marriage breaking up, or grandad getting cancer will solve your need to have absentee parents while also giving you some pathos for the kid that will make them easy to sympathize with. Kids in normal families who don't see their parents come off a different way from kids who can't see their parents, you know?
     
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  9. Shenanigator

    Shenanigator Has the Vocabulary of a Well-Educated Sailor. Contributor

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    I can vouch for the dark side, as I have a character who avoids being at home in my WIP.
     
  10. LostThePlot

    LostThePlot Naysmith Contributor

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    Suffering leads to the dark side my dude :) And suffering is the best fiction.
     
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  11. The Dapper Hooligan

    The Dapper Hooligan (V) ( ;,,;) (v) Contributor

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    Or inversely you could have the highly concerned, overly friendly, photo album showing, multi-coloured mom vest and weird butt jean wearing mom that means well but is so obscenely embarrassing that they're hard to have any kind of social life around.
     
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  12. LostThePlot

    LostThePlot Naysmith Contributor

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    You think having the hyper Freudian all consuming, all controlling mother isn't a form of suffering?
     
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  13. The Dapper Hooligan

    The Dapper Hooligan (V) ( ;,,;) (v) Contributor

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    Yeah, I know better than to get into the 'my suffering is worse than your suffering' argument. :p
     
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  14. LostThePlot

    LostThePlot Naysmith Contributor

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    Hey, I'm not saying it's the worst thing in the world, just saying that suffering is suffering :p My present book is just stuffed full of exactly these mums and they are just... A joy to write. I love how nasty they can be. It's just... *licks lips* ... Delicious suffering dripping off every scene like butter on a cob of corn.
     
  15. Jason Govender

    Jason Govender Member

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    If you are constantly having scenes where the kids need to be alone then I would have one of kids in a serious financial situation where both parents have to work two jobs. Do all of those kinds of scenes at his/her house. Not sure what their constant interactions entail but if they require a 'base of operations' if you will then I think that would work perfectly
     
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