This is why, as much as these franchises are beloved by a certain generation, I feel like Harry Potter, Twilight, Percy Jackson, these franchises are founded on a base premise that is reprehensibly irresponsible on the part of the writer, knowing who the target audience is. These franchises sell the very notion that the now-expulsed OP mentions, that somehow, magically, without any effort on their part, awesomeness will drop into their laps while sitting in their mother's basement. At least Hunger Games paints a protag who earns her way, from the beginning, tooth and nail, through her issues.
It's not about following random dreams. It's about fulfilling your potential. There is also the American dream that they try to sell you on television, which entails buying the newest Volvo so you can make your neighbors jealous, working a desk job 50 + hours a week to get it, maybe taking on a few more loans. Avoid this dream, if you can, but don't avoid YOUR dream.
The thing that has jumped out at me in this thread is the relative youth of those expressing regrets. I mean, 21? If I ran into my 21-year-old self, I might recognize him, but he sure wouldn't recognize me! At 21, I had a plan - I'd go to law school, practice law, get into politics. But by the time I graduated, I'd changed my mind. Instead, I'd go for my masters and then my PhD, teach on the college level and write. So, I took a job I hated (HATED!!) in insurance and put myself through grad school. Got married. Got my MA. Bought a house. Halfway though my doctorate, I discovered that faculties were shrinking and even PhDs were scrambling for adjunct positions. Meanwhile, my wife and I wanted to have children. So, feeling like a failure, I chucked the PhD and went for an MBA in accounting, locking myself into the job I hated (HATED!!) for a few more years. Had a daughter. Got an accounting job at my company even before I got the degree (Wait. You mean someone actually respects me, here??). Had a son. Got passed over for a promotion. Felt like a failure again. Transferred within the company (still the same one) into tax. Really, really nice boss. Found out my daughter had autism. Began splitting my time between work and advocacy. Found out my son was also disabled. Felt like shit. But boss understood. Then boss left company. I got assigned to a project that allowed me to use everything I'd learned in that first job I hated (HATED!!). Led to a job offer from another company, which I took. More money, better title. Felt great. Boss turned out to be a sonofabitch. Career stalled. Felt like a failure, until I had to go advocate. Then old boss (nice one) offered new job at a new company, LOTS more money. Jumped. Felt great. Learned even more about insurance. Then she left, but replacement boss was even better. Many good years. The company got new CEO. Lots of downsizing. Fought a lot, managed to protect some jobs, but pressure became unbearable. So, I left and went to work with the government. Big (HUGE!!!) pay cut. But, funny thing. Ditched the second car and then I didn't miss the money. More time for writing. No pressure. Then, governor started pushing managed care for people with disabilities, forcing agencies to take on extra risk. Suddenly, everything I ever learned in the job I hated (HATED!!), and everything I learned in the jobs I got later because of the job I hated (HATED!!) allowed me to advocate a whole lot better and the state made changes because of it. So, at 21, you are way too young to know what to regret. And most of what you regret at 21 becomes irrelevant later. Same at 27. Or 30. Or 46. Or 58. Or at the ripe old age of 61. Make a difference in someone else's life. I guarantee, you won't regret it.
The difference between your account, and the OP's, is that yours sounds you were doing things. Whether the OP knows it or not, I think his main regret with his life thus far, is not so much what he hasn't achieved (his goals, while far from impossible, are not placed in a realistic context) but the fact that he wasn't trying to achieve.
Yes, but the OP is young enough so that whatever has gone before is irrelevant. He has no context in which to judge himself. And my point was that, though many of the years that I described, I felt like I had a whole lot to regret. And I was wrong.
One regret I have is not getting help for my mental health issues before I actually did. I didn't get help until I was in my early 20's. So for all my teen years, I was fighting my illness all by myself because I never told anyone how I was feeling.
My main regret is my cowardice. All through my life I needed courage, and I didn't have it. I mostly regret not coming out to my family years earlier than I did. That was a serious mistake and it was all about my lack of courage. I could have saved myself years of strife and self-hatred if I'd told my family that I was gay when I was younger, but I didn't. More than anything else, that was what forced me to move out of my hometown of Toronto and head to the west coast. I separated myself from my friends and family and I didn't need to. They accepted me when they finally knew. I underestimated them all, and we all suffered for it. My best advice to young people is to be brave. Have courage. Be yourselves. Take risks - you'll be a better, stronger, and happier person for it.
