I am working on a story. At one point in the story, one of the characters, a teenager, plays piano at an assisted living center. It is a snowy evening, and the dim light of the room is illuminating the faces of the old residents. I am trying to write something to the effect that the music is bringing out old memories on the faces of the residents, but I am having trouble conveying the idea in a couple of sentences. I would appreciate any help. Thank you in advance.
I think if you are a new member there is only a window of maybe a few minutes when you can edit a post, but after you've been a member a certain period it increases.
So you're trying to describe a moment of reflection in the faces of the old people? That's a cool idea, but it does seem like it would be a little difficult to materialize. The main point you want to keep in mind when describing any face of anyone in any piece of writing is that the face is THE main conveyer of emotion, especially if we're looking at characters who aren't really part of the narrative. So are you wanting the old people to think back on these memories fondly? Or do you want them to be sad about it? I'd also try and use words that could describe both the music and the faces at the same time, which would really intertwine the two. For example, you could say something like this, "The gentle piano brought back the melodies of their youth". That's super simple but you get the point.
Have a bit in there where the style of music or song that is being played. Music can evoke emotions, but not if you don't depict it in some form. Plinking on the keys will hardly be enough for the reader to put the music and the emotion displayed by the elderly people. Since they are old you can look for some old-school melodies or songs that would have been popular when they were younger.
I've fixed it for you, it's no editing on the first three posts and 15 minutes to edit while your a new member (20 posts and 2 weeks) - its an anti spam measure... once you aren't a new member any more you can edit with impunity) this also isn't really character development so I moved it to general writing where it will hopefully get a better response
I agree that you should describe the music. But since you've already mentioned it, maybe you can do something with the light as well? That was my first thought. When the light is dim, everything seems to be softer. I don't know your POV, but if it's the teenager, he maybe wonders if it's just the light or his music. So think of the face of an elder person and imagine the effect. Perhaps you can add something like a hesitant smile, closed eyes or a blush and there you are.
